(no subject)
I'm pulling what amounts to an all-nighter on the application for what's basically a dream internship for after graduation. My chances are about one in a million.
As a way of prepping myself for failure and disappointment, I'm telling myself that there is something worthy about trying this hard for something that could be so special, no matter what the expected consequences might be. That I am building an important virtue of being able to throw myself at a cause and follow through with it, to do my dharma for it's own sake.
I can't tell whether I am actually doing it out of hope or just because I'm stubborn and already put myself on this road.
As a way of prepping myself for failure and disappointment, I'm telling myself that there is something worthy about trying this hard for something that could be so special, no matter what the expected consequences might be. That I am building an important virtue of being able to throw myself at a cause and follow through with it, to do my dharma for it's own sake.
I can't tell whether I am actually doing it out of hope or just because I'm stubborn and already put myself on this road.