AHHHHH

[patruck151]

Tonight seriously makes me feel as though someone is just sitting in a room planning out my life and making as crappy as possible. But whatever I'll get over most of the stuff in my life but one thing I can never figure out is my relationships with girls. Like is it that I just suck at being a guy, why does every girl I've ever been interested in first off turn me down, then say its not the right time or i just wanna keep the friendship the way it is. And then those same girls will be interested in a new guy and it suddenly is no longer the wrong time, just when I ask apparently, but what should I expect i mean look at me. Or those girls will decide that with another friend its ok to take a chance, I just don't understand. I mean I still hope that something will change but it looks like I'm gonna have to change me before anything else will happen. I never thought that I would have to change who I am or do I think I should but apparently the way I am is just not good enough for certain people....Well other than that life hasn't been too bad recently!!

http://www.stwing.upenn.edu/~jenf/writing/rant04.html This is something that makes a lil sense!!

You know I wrote all this because its honestly how I feel but at the same time i need to say that I love all these girls or I am growing to love them so the most important thing to me is that they are all happy and just content with their life. Even if I have to be hurt to make that happen I'll live with it because I care more about them than I do about myself. I just wish it wasn't so confusing.