(no subject)
For the past month or so - minus a few days beween the 28th and the 31st - I have had very memorable dreams. This rarely happens to me. Some of them I may call nightmares. Like the one last night for sure. Some seem fairly pleasant. Or at least, they are suspenseful and I do not want to wake up from them. Those may be nightmares too. It is difficult to say.
I assumed that these were mostly the result of essay stress. Essays are done - as of the 28th - but I have since learned (on the 31st) that I was not accepted for any major scholarships for next year. Thus, a lot of very difficult questions are finally coming to surface.
I have begun the job hunt--either working in some literary or artistic capacity at a theatre or else getting a job in education which does not require me to be certified. Both are difficult tasks, but I have begun to fish already. If neither of those bite, I feel that it would be more productive for me to stay here and go into debt rather than return home and-----whatever.
I don't know. What was that line from Sade? "No sooner have I discovered something than I begin to doubt it"... Every other day I come to the conclusion of 'fuck it all' let's just stay. Or go. I have strongly felt both ways about things.
I am escaping a lot, still. Just got some more comics from the library. Playing The Legend of Zelda on my DS finally. (Oh, Katie? I need to send Mike back his games... can you remind me of your house/apt number?)
I haven't been to the theatre in a while. My Gmail just popped with a letter from my editor. Guess I have two shows coming up now. That will be nice. I still haven't decided if I will participate in Paradok's next gig. I'm leaning towards...not. If anyone doubts me, they're free to read a copy of this script.
Alright. This is too sad. I'm stopping. Later.
I assumed that these were mostly the result of essay stress. Essays are done - as of the 28th - but I have since learned (on the 31st) that I was not accepted for any major scholarships for next year. Thus, a lot of very difficult questions are finally coming to surface.
I have begun the job hunt--either working in some literary or artistic capacity at a theatre or else getting a job in education which does not require me to be certified. Both are difficult tasks, but I have begun to fish already. If neither of those bite, I feel that it would be more productive for me to stay here and go into debt rather than return home and-----whatever.
I don't know. What was that line from Sade? "No sooner have I discovered something than I begin to doubt it"... Every other day I come to the conclusion of 'fuck it all' let's just stay. Or go. I have strongly felt both ways about things.
I am escaping a lot, still. Just got some more comics from the library. Playing The Legend of Zelda on my DS finally. (Oh, Katie? I need to send Mike back his games... can you remind me of your house/apt number?)
I haven't been to the theatre in a while. My Gmail just popped with a letter from my editor. Guess I have two shows coming up now. That will be nice. I still haven't decided if I will participate in Paradok's next gig. I'm leaning towards...not. If anyone doubts me, they're free to read a copy of this script.
Alright. This is too sad. I'm stopping. Later.