Snuggle (part B)
Title: Snuggle part B
Series: Love hurts
Written by: Parishs
Rating: pg
Summary: we're looking in two different heads this chapter, first we see Reg's thoughts and after that we focus on Scott's confusion
Prompt: Fun Fic Friday prompt of Snuggle (09-19-2014)
Disclaimer: I own nothing
Warning: English is not my native language, unbeta-ed.
Snuggle part A
Their soft voices outside woke me up. Luke was talking to Reid and although I couldn’t hear what they were saying, it sounded good, relaxed. Luke didn’t shout. Good boy.
Scott’s hand was laying on my chest and it burned a hole in my skin. It made a mess in my head. Because why did he do that? Why was he the first person I felt so sucked to, except from Luke of course, but that was different. Why did I suddenly need someone?
My life had been perfect. My work was exactly what I wanted, I earned a lot of money and I liked the role I had in the development of the new hospital wing. And when I needed a man I just opened my Grinder app and made contact with gorgeous guys.
But slowly Scott had made his entrance in our lives, first as Luke’s intern, and later as a friend in Dolly. As an authority on the design of the wing. Slowly he slipped into the routine Luke and I had for years.
And now and then he asked me about my relationship with Luke. Why was it his business? But he made me think about the subject. What was Luke to me? Why wasn’t he my boyfriend if we were so close?
I could think of so many reasons for that. The most important one was that I never wanted to commit. And Luke and I together as partners…I loved him and we had a click, but not in that way.
Not the way I was lusting after Scott. The young guy asked me things I had never been thinking of. He challenged me. Despite his age he wanted to be taken seriously. He did a great job with the wing when Luke had a break down. He was discrete, he never asked Luke what was wrong, he just tried to save his ass when necessary. He was good looking.
And I had fallen for him, fuck. I needed his hand to move, and his lips on mine, he got me impatient. All I could do was look away from him, ignore him, force my dick to relax. Was this a punishment from a higher force? Feeling his hand on me was almost unbearable.
I stood up and walked to the window when I heard Luke start his car. Where were the going? Did they need their privacy or did he want to give me some alone time with Scott? What was I supposed to do here with him?
I looked at the couch and saw that he was awake. He looked at me. His sleepy eyes ignited a flame in me I couldn’t ignore, but I couldn’t act on it like I was used to, so I said hi and walked to the small shower.
With my head against the tiles I enjoyed the warm water on my back. I wanted to jerk off but I didn’t dare, afraid that he would hear me, or come inside to piss. Straight guys didn’t want to see that from another guy. I could understand that.
So I stayed there, cursing , miserable, till he knocked on the door.
****************
This had been the weirdest night of my life, by far. While Reg was sleeping I had rolled over to him and I had touched his face, softly, afraid to wake him up. A man’s skin was so different from a woman’s, his stubbles scratched against my finger.
How would it feel to kiss him? Would it be as arousing as it was when I kissed Melanie? Would I ever give myself permission to try it?
I felt so save next to him, close to his solid body. I inhaled his scent for a while and tried to feel what it did to me, to smell a musky instead of flowery one.
In the darkness of the night, I listened to the reflexes of my body. I didn’t have to answer to anyone but myself, and for the first time I wanted to know, how his being made my body react. With my nose close to his neck I carefully caressed his chest, picturing myself with him, kissing him. Pulling him on top of me. He would show me the way, he knew what to do, I wasn’t uncertain about our first time, I knew that my curiosity would be enough.
When I touched his torso he made a sound and rolled my way. He was still sleeping so I could continue my journey, and my hand went lower till I touched the part of his body I was a little afraid of. Did I want to see another man’s penis? I loved my own but did I want him to touch it?
I didn’t have the answers, still a little ashamed and flabbergasted by my own awakening gay feelings. Maybe I was going a bit too fast, the first thing I needed to get clear was if I liked his body, and the answer was yes. His scent was arousing, my dick grew harder while I was breathing it in. My fingers touching his underwear wanted to touch flesh, wanted to see what they were capable of, I wanted to see Reg squirm. Could I do that, could I make him feel good? If I just did to him what I liked myself I would see it.
And the idea of his hands touching me….it made me fucking hard. His full lips sucking me, o my god, I had to know if the rumors were true, that guys could blow better than girls. Melanie didn’t do it much, she didn’t like it.
Why was I only thinking about sex, laying so close to Reg? I knew it wasn’t the only thing that drew me to him. I liked the guy he was, his overwhelming concern for Luke’s wellbeing was a little feminine maybe but it was also so sweet. He cared about his friends and he wasn’t afraid to show that.
Snuggled close to the man who had turned my world upside down I slowly became aware of all the stereotypes that were coloring my view. I had an image of how men had to act obviously, and how love should be.
It had been safe, but now things slowly seemed to change, they were not appropriate anymore. Some day, when I had the courage to show him what I felt, I would step into a world I didn’t know. It was both exciting and scary to think about that day. Would I ever express to him what I felt? Or would he be able to read it in my eyes? Would he make the first move?
No, he wouldn’t. He knew I had a girlfriend, he was a very loyal guy, he would never try something with me if I didn’t show him what I needed.
In the dark, I tried to think of places I could give him a hint. Not at work, that would be so awkward. Maybe at Dolly, Friday night, maybe if we had had a few beers and it was my turn to ride the bull, I could ask him to help me, or I could fall off the bull and pretend I was hurt.
If I did that, Reid would come to my rescue and I didn’t need that. Maybe I had to ask him something he knew a lot about, like financial stuff. I could ask him to explain the budget plans to me.
I sighed and rolled on my back. If I was so sure I was going to make a move on him, I could also do that now. But in a way I wasn’t ready yet. It felt wrong to cheat on Melanie, although in a way this had nothing to do with her, I still loved her. Maybe it was just a physical thing I wanted to try.
I closed my eyes and tried to slow my heartbeat down. “Breathe” I told myself over and over in my head like a kind of mantra.
Next chapter
Series: Love hurts
Written by: Parishs
Rating: pg
Summary: we're looking in two different heads this chapter, first we see Reg's thoughts and after that we focus on Scott's confusion
Prompt: Fun Fic Friday prompt of Snuggle (09-19-2014)
Disclaimer: I own nothing
Warning: English is not my native language, unbeta-ed.
Snuggle part A
Their soft voices outside woke me up. Luke was talking to Reid and although I couldn’t hear what they were saying, it sounded good, relaxed. Luke didn’t shout. Good boy.
Scott’s hand was laying on my chest and it burned a hole in my skin. It made a mess in my head. Because why did he do that? Why was he the first person I felt so sucked to, except from Luke of course, but that was different. Why did I suddenly need someone?
My life had been perfect. My work was exactly what I wanted, I earned a lot of money and I liked the role I had in the development of the new hospital wing. And when I needed a man I just opened my Grinder app and made contact with gorgeous guys.
But slowly Scott had made his entrance in our lives, first as Luke’s intern, and later as a friend in Dolly. As an authority on the design of the wing. Slowly he slipped into the routine Luke and I had for years.
And now and then he asked me about my relationship with Luke. Why was it his business? But he made me think about the subject. What was Luke to me? Why wasn’t he my boyfriend if we were so close?
I could think of so many reasons for that. The most important one was that I never wanted to commit. And Luke and I together as partners…I loved him and we had a click, but not in that way.
Not the way I was lusting after Scott. The young guy asked me things I had never been thinking of. He challenged me. Despite his age he wanted to be taken seriously. He did a great job with the wing when Luke had a break down. He was discrete, he never asked Luke what was wrong, he just tried to save his ass when necessary. He was good looking.
And I had fallen for him, fuck. I needed his hand to move, and his lips on mine, he got me impatient. All I could do was look away from him, ignore him, force my dick to relax. Was this a punishment from a higher force? Feeling his hand on me was almost unbearable.
I stood up and walked to the window when I heard Luke start his car. Where were the going? Did they need their privacy or did he want to give me some alone time with Scott? What was I supposed to do here with him?
I looked at the couch and saw that he was awake. He looked at me. His sleepy eyes ignited a flame in me I couldn’t ignore, but I couldn’t act on it like I was used to, so I said hi and walked to the small shower.
With my head against the tiles I enjoyed the warm water on my back. I wanted to jerk off but I didn’t dare, afraid that he would hear me, or come inside to piss. Straight guys didn’t want to see that from another guy. I could understand that.
So I stayed there, cursing , miserable, till he knocked on the door.
****************
This had been the weirdest night of my life, by far. While Reg was sleeping I had rolled over to him and I had touched his face, softly, afraid to wake him up. A man’s skin was so different from a woman’s, his stubbles scratched against my finger.
How would it feel to kiss him? Would it be as arousing as it was when I kissed Melanie? Would I ever give myself permission to try it?
I felt so save next to him, close to his solid body. I inhaled his scent for a while and tried to feel what it did to me, to smell a musky instead of flowery one.
In the darkness of the night, I listened to the reflexes of my body. I didn’t have to answer to anyone but myself, and for the first time I wanted to know, how his being made my body react. With my nose close to his neck I carefully caressed his chest, picturing myself with him, kissing him. Pulling him on top of me. He would show me the way, he knew what to do, I wasn’t uncertain about our first time, I knew that my curiosity would be enough.
When I touched his torso he made a sound and rolled my way. He was still sleeping so I could continue my journey, and my hand went lower till I touched the part of his body I was a little afraid of. Did I want to see another man’s penis? I loved my own but did I want him to touch it?
I didn’t have the answers, still a little ashamed and flabbergasted by my own awakening gay feelings. Maybe I was going a bit too fast, the first thing I needed to get clear was if I liked his body, and the answer was yes. His scent was arousing, my dick grew harder while I was breathing it in. My fingers touching his underwear wanted to touch flesh, wanted to see what they were capable of, I wanted to see Reg squirm. Could I do that, could I make him feel good? If I just did to him what I liked myself I would see it.
And the idea of his hands touching me….it made me fucking hard. His full lips sucking me, o my god, I had to know if the rumors were true, that guys could blow better than girls. Melanie didn’t do it much, she didn’t like it.
Why was I only thinking about sex, laying so close to Reg? I knew it wasn’t the only thing that drew me to him. I liked the guy he was, his overwhelming concern for Luke’s wellbeing was a little feminine maybe but it was also so sweet. He cared about his friends and he wasn’t afraid to show that.
Snuggled close to the man who had turned my world upside down I slowly became aware of all the stereotypes that were coloring my view. I had an image of how men had to act obviously, and how love should be.
It had been safe, but now things slowly seemed to change, they were not appropriate anymore. Some day, when I had the courage to show him what I felt, I would step into a world I didn’t know. It was both exciting and scary to think about that day. Would I ever express to him what I felt? Or would he be able to read it in my eyes? Would he make the first move?
No, he wouldn’t. He knew I had a girlfriend, he was a very loyal guy, he would never try something with me if I didn’t show him what I needed.
In the dark, I tried to think of places I could give him a hint. Not at work, that would be so awkward. Maybe at Dolly, Friday night, maybe if we had had a few beers and it was my turn to ride the bull, I could ask him to help me, or I could fall off the bull and pretend I was hurt.
If I did that, Reid would come to my rescue and I didn’t need that. Maybe I had to ask him something he knew a lot about, like financial stuff. I could ask him to explain the budget plans to me.
I sighed and rolled on my back. If I was so sure I was going to make a move on him, I could also do that now. But in a way I wasn’t ready yet. It felt wrong to cheat on Melanie, although in a way this had nothing to do with her, I still loved her. Maybe it was just a physical thing I wanted to try.
I closed my eyes and tried to slow my heartbeat down. “Breathe” I told myself over and over in my head like a kind of mantra.
Next chapter