(Untitled)

[paripari]

describe one thought currently on your mind:
why on earth am i awake?

list two things in your bedroom:
bed (which is where i should be located but am not)
a hoard of meiji candy boxes which i have preserved for no particular reason.

name three songs that you like:deftones; no ordinary love

Comments

[heirloom]

huh i think my uniform was very, or at least quite comfortable because i couldnt stop sleeping in them. except for metal buttons. plotting to pour tea on my head is not a kind thing. it is not noble either. dont you get agitated looking at david thewlis' penis?

[paripari]

i found them to be the most repulsive things ever, and those buttons were quite bloodthirsty. pouring tea over another persons head is a sacred and divine thing to do in certain cultures. you ought to feel honoured, but here you are being ungrateful. and no, i do not get agitated at anyones privates, that would be impudent. you would do well to learn from me, young man.

[heirloom]

they were definitely repulsive to look at, but how does one explain the copious amounts of sleep i get while wearing the uniform?! in the last two years of school i estimate i spent about twice as much time sleeping in uniform than in any other rag.

your ways are truly wise, ancient sage. i admire you most when you get lost in orchard road.

[paripari]

your excessive sleeping can be attributed to the fact that you are a sloth in human form. they sleep about 20 hours a day. your observations and so-called inferences can hardly be trusted, as you are a sloth. i didnt know you wore rags, however. so i can imagine how comfortable you felt in the uniform, in comparison.
i do not get lost in orchard road. i simply stop to unhurriedly enjoy my surroundings. but i see how you could not possibly tell the difference, seeing as you are a sloth.

[heirloom]

i sleep much less than 20 hours a day, and certainly less than you, as you have witnessed. the accusations of me being a sloth in human guise is groundless, and my inferences are thus reliable. rag stands for REAL AGNES (B).

people stopping to unhurriedly enjoy the surroundings do not make desperate calls to walking road directories such as myself for assistance in getting from orchard mrt station to hilton hotel.

[paripari]

well, perhaps you are a lesser hispanolan ground sloth, then. i have yet to witness any occasion of you sleeping less than i have. (part of me is relieved that you did not really wear a rag, as i had half a mind to send you a sock next christmas.)
and perhaps, out of good will, i wanted to give my walking road directory a chance to feel helpful and therefore achieve a personal victory. i am so very noble and kind.

[heirloom]

you witnessed it just yesterday when i went to bed later than you and awoke about 2 minutes earlier than you. that is proof enough. if you do send a sock for christmas, make sure it's nothing less than dior homme. it would be excellent if you send a pair.

you are as noble and kind as a penguin.

[paripari]

you conveniently forgot to mention that you slept the rest of the day in school, while i, diligent student that i am, was wide awake and eagerly copying down notes. no, i do not think i shall send you a sock (or indeed, a pair of socks) after all.
it is well known that the king penguin is the most gracious of all creatures. i thank you for your comparison, though it is clearly a hyperbole.

[heirloom]

i no longer sleep in school, or at least not as often as before. while i used to sleep through all lessons but music, i only sleep for about half an hour each economics lesson these days. it is a remarkable improvement. i should be commended. perhaps it is because i no longer wear a school uniform. i am probably more diligent than you are because comets have an elliptical orbit.

the king penguin may be a gracious creature, but to say it is the most is blasphemy, for that title belongs to me. see how i willingly bear goods over 2400 kilometres for you; the king penguin does not come close, or even attempts, to top such nobility. nevertheless it is still a noble creature, as much as the merlion.

i think the comparison was less a hyperbole than a penguinification of you.

[paripari]

the only reason why you would be more diligent is because you have to work 10 times as hard as i do in order to produce my results. i sincerely wish i could help by donating some of my superior brain cells to you, but alas, technology is not that advanced.

your air-flown goods happen to be 1 squashed block of chocolate which i can eaily purchase in any local supermarket. i fail to see how that makes you selfless and giving. on the other hand, i purchase periodicals out of the kindness of my heart, just because you are too childishly impatient to wait for them to arrive on your side of the world. patience is a virtue, i say, one which i have plenty of (as evidenced for example by replying to your comments).

there is no such word as penguinification. certainly you are making things up for your personal benefit.

[heirloom]

i do not observe that to be true; many occassions i have seen you grousing continuously for weeks on your heavy workload, whereas i either not grouse or grouse for an evening. this is highly indicative of the amount of work we do. however no relationship can be formulated as my work is different from yours.

my air flown goods include TWO, read this, TWO LOTR pins, which in turn came from somewhere in the eastern states. the total distance covered by the two pins would be somewhere around twice the distance between singapore and perth. i could have easily forgotten all about them, as i frequently do with my wallets, but no, i am selfless and giving - i even give my wallets to strangers i do not know

[paripari]

i happen to grouse about schoolwork so that you will not feel too badly about your own state of affairs. it is just a simple act of thoughtfulness which comes naturally to me.

those pins were probably lurking at the bottom of your bag anyway. i am certain they did not add much to its overall weight seeing as your ibook is already significantly heavy (as compared to, say, my powerbook). in some parts of the world, we do not consider it wise to award random strangers with our valuble possessions, but perhaps your wallet was so worthless and your eyes so wonky that you mistook the stranger for a trash receptacle.

however, let it not be said that i am an ingrate. i do appreciate the great pains you have taken to remember my goods, as it is no doubt very taxing on your small brain.

i did not notice that i make braying noises. if i did so in the past, i am sorry to have impinged on your delicate sense of hearing. in the future, i will make sure to only bray loudly whenever you do not happen to have any kind of recording device at hand.

[heirloom]

i am glad to have such a thoughtful and simple friend, but i must sadly inform you your simple acts do not have any effect. simple as they are, i appreciate your effort, and understand different people have different capabilities.

my wallet was far from worthless, in fact, anything that has been touched by me cannot be worthless. i can be said to have some sort of midas touch. improbable, but true.

i say, you are such an ingrate.

old friends do not stand on ceremony; feel free to make braying noises even in the presence of some kind of recording device - i am more than willing to put up with your eccentricities.

[paripari]

truly, i thank you for recognising the immense lengths i go to just for you. your sweet and musical words certainly brighten up my day.

it is certainly not applicable to call me an ingrate now as i have already refuted this groundless accusation beforehand.

you seem to be more willing to put up a video documentary of my behaviour online, rather than to put up with my eccentricities themselves. (chortle at my witty wordplay now) rest assured that i will not allow you to operate any recording device when i am engaged in potentially embarassing activities.