Halftime down.
Hey ho. It's been a little over a week (Friday) that I've been off work for the Olympics. I have started adjusting to Japanese time since the 19th and am fully in Olympic mode.
I'd love to go all "yay!" and tell you about my highlights, but I honestly don't really find time for anything while the Games are on. And that's pretty much OK, even though I have really struggled to find a good time to go grocery shopping because at the best times the shops are still closed. :0P
But now that the event is halfway through, I experience my first real down. I had difficulty falling asleep last night (pardon, afternoon/early evening for you) and woke up super tired. I pseudo napped a few times, but there's always this dilemma of napping vs. catching up on recordings, so yeah, I wasn't quite my usual self.
Until I was.
And then again I wasn't, and I've been slightly depressed ever since. One or two hours ago, a message popped up on my phone from my friend the actress. That was enough to bring my mood down. I didn't even have to open the message, I already knew what it would be about. It saddens me that receiving a message from one of my darest friends has that effect on me.
To fill you in, she first apologized for not reacting to the pics I sent her at her daughter's b-day back in May (MAY!), and then proceeded to ask if I would join them for her own birthday celebrations early next week.
On the one hand I was expecting this to happen, but frankly speaking I was hoping she wouldn't approach me. Because a) Olympics, and b) Covid cases rising again, Delta variant and all. Now I have to come up with a nice way to turn her down. Again. And while I have a really good excuse since what she has planned is in no way manageable for me anyway, I'm also getting a little peeved that she has the nerve to ask so casually. It's no secret that I've been taking vacations to watch the Olympics live for years, and it's been all over FB this time as well. (Like, the other day I posted a pic at 6:something a.m., stating that I've been up for 5 hours.)
The b-day event will be: eating out together at a restaurant at around 8 p.m.
That's 3 a.m. Japanese time. There's no way I'd join at that time even if I was willing to shift my priorities. That's deep in the night for me and I won't go back to adjusting time zones until after the events.
It's a restaurant. I actually had to google the current restrictions because I've had no plans to eat out, go shopping, visit museums or doing anything else of that sorts at least until I'm considered fully vaccinated. I am not, at this point. Which means I'd need a negative Covid test to enter a restaurnat. Outdoors seating would be fine without, but I don't even know that place, I don't know how crowded it might be, and nobody can predict the weather. Needless to say, I don't have the time or nerve to organize being tested that same day.
And lastly, I'm not really in the mood to meet people at this point of the pandemic. Especially not if I have no idea who these people are, where they have been, how they behaved during the pandemic, and whether they have tested themselves. And even less so if I'm this close to getting my second jab.
I'm probably one of the few people who still prefers to self-isolate and to keep a distance when I run into people outdoors. Yes, even outdoors.
Well, I'm trying no to be too hard on her. She has a life to take care of and a family and probably enough troubles of her own (she mentioned a group therapy that I will have to ask her about), so I never put any pressure on her despite the radio silence. She can't possibly know how I currently feel about the pandemic if we haven't been in touch for weeks. I still think she could at least have mentioned something along the lines of "if you're comfortable with that," "you may have to get a Covid test," "are you still awake at that time of day?" I was a little perplexed when I read the message that she expects me to find that appointment doable. I knew the instant the message popped up that it would be about her birthday, but I thought she'd maybe suggest a get-together at their place in the afternoon or something.
I had wanted to write just a teeny tiny post about the message because I can't go to sleep without getting this out of my systen. Look how I have vented, yet again.
Of course she doesn't have to anticipate all my thoughts and worries. Of course I'm making this about me when it's just a stupid birthday invitation for her big day, not mine. Of course I'm in no position to be mad or to complain.
Of course?
Hmm. Actually, if the pure thought of receiving an invitation shatters my well-being like it did today, I definitely am in a position to make this about me as well.
And with that, I'm signing off for today. It's already almost 1 a.m. in my little universe, which is way past my time.
PS: I have no idea when FFS I should take the time to message her back.
I'd love to go all "yay!" and tell you about my highlights, but I honestly don't really find time for anything while the Games are on. And that's pretty much OK, even though I have really struggled to find a good time to go grocery shopping because at the best times the shops are still closed. :0P
But now that the event is halfway through, I experience my first real down. I had difficulty falling asleep last night (pardon, afternoon/early evening for you) and woke up super tired. I pseudo napped a few times, but there's always this dilemma of napping vs. catching up on recordings, so yeah, I wasn't quite my usual self.
Until I was.
And then again I wasn't, and I've been slightly depressed ever since. One or two hours ago, a message popped up on my phone from my friend the actress. That was enough to bring my mood down. I didn't even have to open the message, I already knew what it would be about. It saddens me that receiving a message from one of my darest friends has that effect on me.
To fill you in, she first apologized for not reacting to the pics I sent her at her daughter's b-day back in May (MAY!), and then proceeded to ask if I would join them for her own birthday celebrations early next week.
On the one hand I was expecting this to happen, but frankly speaking I was hoping she wouldn't approach me. Because a) Olympics, and b) Covid cases rising again, Delta variant and all. Now I have to come up with a nice way to turn her down. Again. And while I have a really good excuse since what she has planned is in no way manageable for me anyway, I'm also getting a little peeved that she has the nerve to ask so casually. It's no secret that I've been taking vacations to watch the Olympics live for years, and it's been all over FB this time as well. (Like, the other day I posted a pic at 6:something a.m., stating that I've been up for 5 hours.)
The b-day event will be: eating out together at a restaurant at around 8 p.m.
That's 3 a.m. Japanese time. There's no way I'd join at that time even if I was willing to shift my priorities. That's deep in the night for me and I won't go back to adjusting time zones until after the events.
It's a restaurant. I actually had to google the current restrictions because I've had no plans to eat out, go shopping, visit museums or doing anything else of that sorts at least until I'm considered fully vaccinated. I am not, at this point. Which means I'd need a negative Covid test to enter a restaurnat. Outdoors seating would be fine without, but I don't even know that place, I don't know how crowded it might be, and nobody can predict the weather. Needless to say, I don't have the time or nerve to organize being tested that same day.
And lastly, I'm not really in the mood to meet people at this point of the pandemic. Especially not if I have no idea who these people are, where they have been, how they behaved during the pandemic, and whether they have tested themselves. And even less so if I'm this close to getting my second jab.
I'm probably one of the few people who still prefers to self-isolate and to keep a distance when I run into people outdoors. Yes, even outdoors.
Well, I'm trying no to be too hard on her. She has a life to take care of and a family and probably enough troubles of her own (she mentioned a group therapy that I will have to ask her about), so I never put any pressure on her despite the radio silence. She can't possibly know how I currently feel about the pandemic if we haven't been in touch for weeks. I still think she could at least have mentioned something along the lines of "if you're comfortable with that," "you may have to get a Covid test," "are you still awake at that time of day?" I was a little perplexed when I read the message that she expects me to find that appointment doable. I knew the instant the message popped up that it would be about her birthday, but I thought she'd maybe suggest a get-together at their place in the afternoon or something.
I had wanted to write just a teeny tiny post about the message because I can't go to sleep without getting this out of my systen. Look how I have vented, yet again.
Of course she doesn't have to anticipate all my thoughts and worries. Of course I'm making this about me when it's just a stupid birthday invitation for her big day, not mine. Of course I'm in no position to be mad or to complain.
Of course?
Hmm. Actually, if the pure thought of receiving an invitation shatters my well-being like it did today, I definitely am in a position to make this about me as well.
And with that, I'm signing off for today. It's already almost 1 a.m. in my little universe, which is way past my time.
PS: I have no idea when FFS I should take the time to message her back.