(no subject)
sometimes i really wonder why i stuck around here? why didnt i just go away to florida or san diego like i planned. im an idiot. i dont regret staying here. i really dont. i had so much fun-but like i need a big change in my life. i always planned on leaving after high school. why did i stick around? im so fucking lame. why didnt i go to art school like i ALWAYS wanted? and why did i give up on everything i was good at? now im stuck. doing hair. which i love-but have lost my passion for. and it feels too much like work. and i promised myself i would never have a job where it felt like work. im going to this huge hair show end of march...and i think im going to talk to the rusk representatives to see what my career choices are. idk..i think im looking too hard. im just not feeling anything latley. the cool thing is both my eng. and fashiion teachers are awesome. and inspire the fuck out of me. in english we're doing all poetry, and im in love with it. i used to never get it, but i realized you dont have to get it-you just have to apreciate it. and in fashion my teacher says she sees something in me and that i have a good eye. she inspires me to do what i love and not let anyone stand in my way. next year im going to new york with my fashion class and her. maybe paris too, but idk if i'll have the money for paris. i found an awesome girl for brax shes in my fashion class. and i love her. chads parents are gone all this week. im going over there right now to let roxanne out. hes at isu scheduling his class with brian and mauter. its snowing real bad today. i hope that i see nikki tonite. she might go by chads. i miss my cosmo girls. sooooo much. i miss the drama, and i miss the crazness. i miss everything