"Lord, What Fools These Mortals Be!" [Complete]
Character(s): Kadaj & Lorie
Content: After this conversation, Kadaj decides to get some answers by pestering Lorie via IM.
Setting: PIMP
Time: Um... after this conversation? 8D
Warnings: .... Lies, lies, lies, and more lies.
[16:15] Argent Poison: So, tell me about Jenova.
[16:15] princess shotgun: Uhm, she's an alien?
[16:15] Argent Poison: Yes, I know that part.
[16:16] princess shotgun: Oh! Okay.
[16:16] Argent Poison: Where is she?
[16:16] princess shotgun: Uh...
[16:16] princess shotgun: I don't know.
[16:16] Argent Poison: ....
[16:16] Argent Poison: Then why did you apologize?
[16:18] princess shotgun: Someone has stolen some important files that I know had to do with her! And they--well, obviously, if they took those, they had to know where she is located, as the files were kept near her. And I suppose that means she's in danger...
[16:20] Argent Poison: That doesn't make sense...
[16:20] princess shotgun: What?
[16:23] Argent Poison: Her location wouldn't be on file, unless the President had done more searching than I thought...
[16:24] princess shotgun: But she's with us...
[16:24] Argent Poison: So you did get to her before me.
[16:24] Argent Poison: Where is she?
[16:24] princess shotgun: ..What exactly is it you want with her?
[16:25] Argent Poison: Reunion.
[16:25] princess shotgun: What?
[16:25] Argent Poison: The Reunion.
[16:25] princess shotgun: What's the Reunion?
[16:26] Argent Poison: Your president really tells you nothing, doesn't he?
[16:26] princess shotgun: I don't ever speak to Mr. ShinRa directly.
[16:26] Argent Poison: I suppose that means you're useless then.
[16:26] princess shotgun: I'm not useless!!
[16:27] Argent Poison: Really~?
[16:27] princess shotgun: There's a reason I'm in this position! I would have been happy to help you, too, but it seems like you're just a... uh... a big meanie!
[16:28] Argent Poison: ... You really are useless.
[16:29] Argent Poison: Are you sure you're not some secretary or something? I thought I was speaking with a Turk.
[16:29] princess shotgun: I am a Turk!
[16:29] Argent Poison: I don't believe you~
[16:30] princess shotgun: Just because I don't know what 'Reunion' is?
[16:30] Argent Poison: Well, after what happened two years ago...
[16:30] Argent Poison: I would assume the President would at least want his Turks briefed.
[16:30] princess shotgun: What happened two years ago?
[16:31] Argent Poison: .... You really are useless.
[16:31] princess shotgun: Tell me!
[16:31] Argent Poison: Were you living under a rock?
[16:31] Argent Poison: ... Hm, maybe not the best question.
[16:32] princess shotgun: Tell me what happened.
[16:32] Argent Poison: Did you go that entire time without looking up at the sky at least once?
[16:32] princess shotgun: What does the sky have anything to do with this?
[16:33] Argent Poison: Only everything.
[16:33] princess shotgun: I don't understand. Nothing's happened... we found Jenova, and have been studying her for years... that's it...
[16:34] Argent Poison: ... Something's not right here...
[16:34] Argent Poison: You don't know about Meteor.
[16:34] Argent Poison: You say you've been studying Mother for years.
[16:34] Argent Poison: You say you have her...
[16:34] princess shotgun: ...what's Meteor?
[16:34] Argent Poison: Useless.
[16:35] princess shotgun: We do have her!
[16:35] Argent Poison: Meteor is the ultimate destructive magic, for your information.
[16:35] Argent Poison: And I really don't think I believe you about that.
[16:35] princess shotgun: Well, something's screwed up!
[16:36] princess shotgun: Because... well, another Turk I know, she was on a mission in Midgar and I was no where in Midgar. But somehow we both ended up in this place! And I was doing was walking. It's like... some kind of... I dunno!
[16:36] Argent Poison: ... Midgar was destroyed two years ago.
[16:36] princess shotgun: And now you're saying all this weird stuff about things I don't know about...
[16:37] princess shotgun: ...No?
[16:37] Argent Poison: It's nothing but a ruin now.
[16:37] Argent Poison: Why would that Turk be sent there if there's nothing...?
[16:38] princess shotgun: ShinRa's headquarters are there. I work and live there! It's not destroyed.
[16:38] Argent Poison: Yes it is.
[16:38] princess shotgun: No... I was there just yesterday!
[16:39] Argent Poison: Now I know you're lying.
[16:39] princess shotgun: I am not, you're crazy!
[16:39] Argent Poison: Hahaha!
[16:39] Argent Poison: What an awful thing to say!
[16:39] princess shotgun: My friend just posted on the message board thing about being in Midgar. Why would she lie too? You can go look if you want!
[16:42] Argent Poison: ... Assuming the two of you aren't lying, and you really were in Midgar...
[16:42] princess shotgun: Which is true...
[16:43] Argent Poison: I'll be the judge of that, thank you.
[16:44] Argent Poison: Assuming it's true, that doesn't explain how I...
[16:44] princess shotgun: What?
[16:44] Argent Poison: What a ridiculous idea.
[16:44] princess shotgun: ...?
[16:44] Argent Poison: You two, from the past. Silly, isn't it?
[16:44] Argent Poison: You have to be lying.
[16:45] princess shotgun: Why would she talk about Midgar for no reason at all? We have no one to impress, and no one here even knows what Midgar is...
[16:46] Argent Poison: I know what it is.
[16:46] princess shotgun: Except you! But we didn't know you existed... well, she still doesn't.
[16:46] Argent Poison: Maybe this is some ploy the President came up with...
[16:46] princess shotgun: Let's test that past idea.
[16:46] princess shotgun: Who is the President?
[16:47] Argent Poison: Rufus ShinRa.
[16:47] princess shotgun: ....
[16:47] princess shotgun: No he's not..
[16:47] Argent Poison: Yes he is...
[16:47] princess shotgun: No, he's Mr. ShinRa's son. And he's hardly ever here, and hardly has anything to do with the company. He doesn't like the way Mr. ShinRa runs it.
[16:48] princess shotgun: And I'm going to get in big trouble for telling you all this to prove a point so you better not say I'm useless again!
[16:49] Argent Poison: Hehe. Then I won't.
[16:49] princess shotgun: Well, it's your loss if you don't believe me.
[16:49] Argent Poison: I think I do.
[16:49] Argent Poison: However, that really does make you useless.
[16:50] Argent Poison: If you're from Gaia's past, you have no idea where Mother is.
[16:50] princess shotgun: ...Mother?
[16:50] Argent Poison: Yes, Mother. Jenova.
[16:50] princess shotgun: Jenova's in our labs!
[16:50] Argent Poison: She was, in your time. Not in mine.
[16:51] princess shotgun: Oh... I guess you're right--but... how do I know YOU aren't lying?
[16:51] Argent Poison: Hee. That's for you to wonder.
[16:51] princess shotgun: You tricked me!!
[16:51] Argent Poison: Did I~?
[16:51] Argent Poison: What a shame.
[16:51] princess shotgun: Argh! I'm going to get in so much trouble now! Stupid stupid stupid!!!
[16:52] Argent Poison: Hehe. Well, you've been very helpful, in your own little way. I'm through with talking to you.
[16:52] Argent Poison: Goodbye.
[16:53] princess shotgun: I'm going to notify all of ShinRa about you! You're in big trouble!!
[16:54] Argent Poison: I really don't care.
[16:54] princess shotgun: I have orders to kill on sight. Watch it.
[16:54] Argent Poison: Oh, please.
[16:54] Argent Poison: You don't even know what I look like, do you?
[16:55] princess shotgun: We have enchances images from our surveillance cameras, of course I do!
[16:55] Argent Poison: Surveillance cameras?
[16:56] princess shotgun: From when you stole our files!
[16:56] Argent Poison: Oh no! What will I do?
[16:57] princess shotgun: I'm going to find you!
[16:57] Argent Poison: I'd better look out!
[16:57] princess shotgun: You should!! I'm dangerous!
[16:58] Argent Poison: It looks like I chose the wrong people to mess with.
[16:59] princess shotgun: You did! I'm an experienced hunter, it won't take me long to find you, you thief!
[16:59] Argent Poison: I'm terrified.
[16:59] princess shotgun: As you should be!!
[16:59] Argent Poison: Are we done yet? I have people to find.
[17:00] princess shotgun: You better start running!
[17:00] Argent Poison: Yes, running.
[17:00] princess shotgun: Hmph.... are you making fun of me?
[17:00] Argent Poison: Of course not. Whatever gave you that idea?
[17:01] princess shotgun: Argh! That's it, now you're REALLY in for it!!!
[17:01] Argent Poison: Yes, of course.
[17:01] princess shotgun: You are! What's your name?
[17:01] Argent Poison: Hmm...
[17:01] Argent Poison: Cloud Strife.
[17:02] princess shotgun: Well, Cloud, your days are numbered!
[17:02] Argent Poison: No argument there.
[17:03] princess shotgun: Your sarcasm will only make it worse!
[17:03] Argent Poison: Good!
[17:03] princess shotgun: ...Good?
[17:03] princess shotgun: Are you some kind of masochist?
[17:03] Argent Poison: Oh yes~
[17:04] princess shotgun: ...That's creepy!!
[17:04] Argent Poison: Hee. Isn't it?
[17:04] princess shotgun: How could you like pain? It's all... painful!
[17:04] Argent Poison: Do you really want me to explain masochism to you?
[17:04] princess shotgun: ...Spare me. You're gross.
[17:04] Argent Poison: Hehe. Thank you.
[17:05] princess shotgun: If you like pain, why don't you tell me where you are so we can get finished sooner?
[17:06] Argent Poison: Oh, please. You don't expect it to be that easy, do you?
[17:06] Argent Poison: Haven't you ever heard of "the thrill of the chase?"
[17:06] princess shotgun: ....All right.
[17:06] princess shotgun: I'll go hunting, then! Just like when my father takes me on hunts!
[17:07] Argent Poison: Have fun.
[17:07] princess shotgun: I will.
[17:07] Argent Poison: I have spiky blond hair and blue eyes. Happy hunting.
[17:08] princess shotgun: Right!
Content: After this conversation, Kadaj decides to get some answers by pestering Lorie via IM.
Setting: PIMP
Time: Um... after this conversation? 8D
Warnings: .... Lies, lies, lies, and more lies.
[16:15] Argent Poison: So, tell me about Jenova.
[16:15] princess shotgun: Uhm, she's an alien?
[16:15] Argent Poison: Yes, I know that part.
[16:16] princess shotgun: Oh! Okay.
[16:16] Argent Poison: Where is she?
[16:16] princess shotgun: Uh...
[16:16] princess shotgun: I don't know.
[16:16] Argent Poison: ....
[16:16] Argent Poison: Then why did you apologize?
[16:18] princess shotgun: Someone has stolen some important files that I know had to do with her! And they--well, obviously, if they took those, they had to know where she is located, as the files were kept near her. And I suppose that means she's in danger...
[16:20] Argent Poison: That doesn't make sense...
[16:20] princess shotgun: What?
[16:23] Argent Poison: Her location wouldn't be on file, unless the President had done more searching than I thought...
[16:24] princess shotgun: But she's with us...
[16:24] Argent Poison: So you did get to her before me.
[16:24] Argent Poison: Where is she?
[16:24] princess shotgun: ..What exactly is it you want with her?
[16:25] Argent Poison: Reunion.
[16:25] princess shotgun: What?
[16:25] Argent Poison: The Reunion.
[16:25] princess shotgun: What's the Reunion?
[16:26] Argent Poison: Your president really tells you nothing, doesn't he?
[16:26] princess shotgun: I don't ever speak to Mr. ShinRa directly.
[16:26] Argent Poison: I suppose that means you're useless then.
[16:26] princess shotgun: I'm not useless!!
[16:27] Argent Poison: Really~?
[16:27] princess shotgun: There's a reason I'm in this position! I would have been happy to help you, too, but it seems like you're just a... uh... a big meanie!
[16:28] Argent Poison: ... You really are useless.
[16:29] Argent Poison: Are you sure you're not some secretary or something? I thought I was speaking with a Turk.
[16:29] princess shotgun: I am a Turk!
[16:29] Argent Poison: I don't believe you~
[16:30] princess shotgun: Just because I don't know what 'Reunion' is?
[16:30] Argent Poison: Well, after what happened two years ago...
[16:30] Argent Poison: I would assume the President would at least want his Turks briefed.
[16:30] princess shotgun: What happened two years ago?
[16:31] Argent Poison: .... You really are useless.
[16:31] princess shotgun: Tell me!
[16:31] Argent Poison: Were you living under a rock?
[16:31] Argent Poison: ... Hm, maybe not the best question.
[16:32] princess shotgun: Tell me what happened.
[16:32] Argent Poison: Did you go that entire time without looking up at the sky at least once?
[16:32] princess shotgun: What does the sky have anything to do with this?
[16:33] Argent Poison: Only everything.
[16:33] princess shotgun: I don't understand. Nothing's happened... we found Jenova, and have been studying her for years... that's it...
[16:34] Argent Poison: ... Something's not right here...
[16:34] Argent Poison: You don't know about Meteor.
[16:34] Argent Poison: You say you've been studying Mother for years.
[16:34] Argent Poison: You say you have her...
[16:34] princess shotgun: ...what's Meteor?
[16:34] Argent Poison: Useless.
[16:35] princess shotgun: We do have her!
[16:35] Argent Poison: Meteor is the ultimate destructive magic, for your information.
[16:35] Argent Poison: And I really don't think I believe you about that.
[16:35] princess shotgun: Well, something's screwed up!
[16:36] princess shotgun: Because... well, another Turk I know, she was on a mission in Midgar and I was no where in Midgar. But somehow we both ended up in this place! And I was doing was walking. It's like... some kind of... I dunno!
[16:36] Argent Poison: ... Midgar was destroyed two years ago.
[16:36] princess shotgun: And now you're saying all this weird stuff about things I don't know about...
[16:37] princess shotgun: ...No?
[16:37] Argent Poison: It's nothing but a ruin now.
[16:37] Argent Poison: Why would that Turk be sent there if there's nothing...?
[16:38] princess shotgun: ShinRa's headquarters are there. I work and live there! It's not destroyed.
[16:38] Argent Poison: Yes it is.
[16:38] princess shotgun: No... I was there just yesterday!
[16:39] Argent Poison: Now I know you're lying.
[16:39] princess shotgun: I am not, you're crazy!
[16:39] Argent Poison: Hahaha!
[16:39] Argent Poison: What an awful thing to say!
[16:39] princess shotgun: My friend just posted on the message board thing about being in Midgar. Why would she lie too? You can go look if you want!
[16:42] Argent Poison: ... Assuming the two of you aren't lying, and you really were in Midgar...
[16:42] princess shotgun: Which is true...
[16:43] Argent Poison: I'll be the judge of that, thank you.
[16:44] Argent Poison: Assuming it's true, that doesn't explain how I...
[16:44] princess shotgun: What?
[16:44] Argent Poison: What a ridiculous idea.
[16:44] princess shotgun: ...?
[16:44] Argent Poison: You two, from the past. Silly, isn't it?
[16:44] Argent Poison: You have to be lying.
[16:45] princess shotgun: Why would she talk about Midgar for no reason at all? We have no one to impress, and no one here even knows what Midgar is...
[16:46] Argent Poison: I know what it is.
[16:46] princess shotgun: Except you! But we didn't know you existed... well, she still doesn't.
[16:46] Argent Poison: Maybe this is some ploy the President came up with...
[16:46] princess shotgun: Let's test that past idea.
[16:46] princess shotgun: Who is the President?
[16:47] Argent Poison: Rufus ShinRa.
[16:47] princess shotgun: ....
[16:47] princess shotgun: No he's not..
[16:47] Argent Poison: Yes he is...
[16:47] princess shotgun: No, he's Mr. ShinRa's son. And he's hardly ever here, and hardly has anything to do with the company. He doesn't like the way Mr. ShinRa runs it.
[16:48] princess shotgun: And I'm going to get in big trouble for telling you all this to prove a point so you better not say I'm useless again!
[16:49] Argent Poison: Hehe. Then I won't.
[16:49] princess shotgun: Well, it's your loss if you don't believe me.
[16:49] Argent Poison: I think I do.
[16:49] Argent Poison: However, that really does make you useless.
[16:50] Argent Poison: If you're from Gaia's past, you have no idea where Mother is.
[16:50] princess shotgun: ...Mother?
[16:50] Argent Poison: Yes, Mother. Jenova.
[16:50] princess shotgun: Jenova's in our labs!
[16:50] Argent Poison: She was, in your time. Not in mine.
[16:51] princess shotgun: Oh... I guess you're right--but... how do I know YOU aren't lying?
[16:51] Argent Poison: Hee. That's for you to wonder.
[16:51] princess shotgun: You tricked me!!
[16:51] Argent Poison: Did I~?
[16:51] Argent Poison: What a shame.
[16:51] princess shotgun: Argh! I'm going to get in so much trouble now! Stupid stupid stupid!!!
[16:52] Argent Poison: Hehe. Well, you've been very helpful, in your own little way. I'm through with talking to you.
[16:52] Argent Poison: Goodbye.
[16:53] princess shotgun: I'm going to notify all of ShinRa about you! You're in big trouble!!
[16:54] Argent Poison: I really don't care.
[16:54] princess shotgun: I have orders to kill on sight. Watch it.
[16:54] Argent Poison: Oh, please.
[16:54] Argent Poison: You don't even know what I look like, do you?
[16:55] princess shotgun: We have enchances images from our surveillance cameras, of course I do!
[16:55] Argent Poison: Surveillance cameras?
[16:56] princess shotgun: From when you stole our files!
[16:56] Argent Poison: Oh no! What will I do?
[16:57] princess shotgun: I'm going to find you!
[16:57] Argent Poison: I'd better look out!
[16:57] princess shotgun: You should!! I'm dangerous!
[16:58] Argent Poison: It looks like I chose the wrong people to mess with.
[16:59] princess shotgun: You did! I'm an experienced hunter, it won't take me long to find you, you thief!
[16:59] Argent Poison: I'm terrified.
[16:59] princess shotgun: As you should be!!
[16:59] Argent Poison: Are we done yet? I have people to find.
[17:00] princess shotgun: You better start running!
[17:00] Argent Poison: Yes, running.
[17:00] princess shotgun: Hmph.... are you making fun of me?
[17:00] Argent Poison: Of course not. Whatever gave you that idea?
[17:01] princess shotgun: Argh! That's it, now you're REALLY in for it!!!
[17:01] Argent Poison: Yes, of course.
[17:01] princess shotgun: You are! What's your name?
[17:01] Argent Poison: Hmm...
[17:01] Argent Poison: Cloud Strife.
[17:02] princess shotgun: Well, Cloud, your days are numbered!
[17:02] Argent Poison: No argument there.
[17:03] princess shotgun: Your sarcasm will only make it worse!
[17:03] Argent Poison: Good!
[17:03] princess shotgun: ...Good?
[17:03] princess shotgun: Are you some kind of masochist?
[17:03] Argent Poison: Oh yes~
[17:04] princess shotgun: ...That's creepy!!
[17:04] Argent Poison: Hee. Isn't it?
[17:04] princess shotgun: How could you like pain? It's all... painful!
[17:04] Argent Poison: Do you really want me to explain masochism to you?
[17:04] princess shotgun: ...Spare me. You're gross.
[17:04] Argent Poison: Hehe. Thank you.
[17:05] princess shotgun: If you like pain, why don't you tell me where you are so we can get finished sooner?
[17:06] Argent Poison: Oh, please. You don't expect it to be that easy, do you?
[17:06] Argent Poison: Haven't you ever heard of "the thrill of the chase?"
[17:06] princess shotgun: ....All right.
[17:06] princess shotgun: I'll go hunting, then! Just like when my father takes me on hunts!
[17:07] Argent Poison: Have fun.
[17:07] princess shotgun: I will.
[17:07] Argent Poison: I have spiky blond hair and blue eyes. Happy hunting.
[17:08] princess shotgun: Right!