(no subject)
things change way too much around here.
of course, change is usually a good thing.
but not when you're changing your mind every 30 seconds.
is it possible for me to want one thing at a time?
one thing for a length of time reasonable enough for me to get it.
that's all I want.
I think...
Torrie has been in and out again lately.
part of me wants to just go with it;
enjoy the short amount of time when she is around.
but the better part, the weaker part of me,
just wants her to disappear.
I don't want to deal with this roller coaster anymore.
don't know when I'm graduating anymore.
fucked up my classes and lost all motivation.
it's nights like these where giving up just feels so easy.
I really don't want to do anything anymore.
they say it's depression, bipolar, borderline personality disorder, schizophrenic tendencies, deviant behavior, growing up, lashing out, PMS, withdrawals.
truth is, it's just me.
I am who I am and I manage the best I can.
the only time I'm sober is when I'm teaching.
I know it makes me happy, but I fucking hate it.
I hate that I'm so insecure.
of course, change is usually a good thing.
but not when you're changing your mind every 30 seconds.
is it possible for me to want one thing at a time?
one thing for a length of time reasonable enough for me to get it.
that's all I want.
I think...
Torrie has been in and out again lately.
part of me wants to just go with it;
enjoy the short amount of time when she is around.
but the better part, the weaker part of me,
just wants her to disappear.
I don't want to deal with this roller coaster anymore.
don't know when I'm graduating anymore.
fucked up my classes and lost all motivation.
it's nights like these where giving up just feels so easy.
I really don't want to do anything anymore.
they say it's depression, bipolar, borderline personality disorder, schizophrenic tendencies, deviant behavior, growing up, lashing out, PMS, withdrawals.
truth is, it's just me.
I am who I am and I manage the best I can.
the only time I'm sober is when I'm teaching.
I know it makes me happy, but I fucking hate it.
I hate that I'm so insecure.