Lo! An Exception!
The author I'm posting about now is not one that offends me. I love her work. I love it so much that I won't even assign her a tag for this post. Due to the AU nature and supercomedy genre, I give this fic leeway and even if I didn't, there would be nothing to get mad at. There was one line in it that pulled me out of the story so completely and it was so perfect in that tutorial kind of way that I had to post about it:
"Slender, but nice looking, with a well-proportioned rack, tall, but not beastly tall, and a long sweep of porn-star looking blonde hair where some locks were curled, others straight."
Porn star? Porn star? Do you see why I had to post it now? There is no better way to throw someone out of a story than to use the term "porn star" to describe something, even hair.
This is how not to fanfic, people. Never use "porn star" to describe anything. That is a noun and should never be turned into an adjective. Think hard about your word choice. Are you going to use something that is normally not an adjective (and probably should not be) to describe something? If you are planning to use something like "porn-star-looking," don't do it. Similarly, don't use "dissect" to describe examining someone's face. Words have connotations and those connotations really matter. Think about them.
Now Busy Reading That Fic Again,
Paige
"Slender, but nice looking, with a well-proportioned rack, tall, but not beastly tall, and a long sweep of porn-star looking blonde hair where some locks were curled, others straight."
Porn star? Porn star? Do you see why I had to post it now? There is no better way to throw someone out of a story than to use the term "porn star" to describe something, even hair.
This is how not to fanfic, people. Never use "porn star" to describe anything. That is a noun and should never be turned into an adjective. Think hard about your word choice. Are you going to use something that is normally not an adjective (and probably should not be) to describe something? If you are planning to use something like "porn-star-looking," don't do it. Similarly, don't use "dissect" to describe examining someone's face. Words have connotations and those connotations really matter. Think about them.
Now Busy Reading That Fic Again,
Paige