Neurosis (noo-roh-sis)
1.Also called psychoneurosis. a functional disorder in which feelings of anxiety, obsessional thoughts, compulsive acts, and physical complaints without objective evidence of disease, in various degrees and patterns, dominate the personality.
2. A relatively mild personality disorder typified by excessive anxiety or indecision and a degree of social or interpersonal maladjustment.
I think I've been suffering from neurosis a couple days after the tragic earthquake + tsunami of a combination that wiped out a part of Japan.
I was seated in my classroom, taking my final exam for Constitutional Law 2 when I felt like someone was kicking my chair from behind. So I turned around to scold Margrein, only to see him seated about one meter away. It completely slipped my mind that seating arrangements during exam week was to situate chairs as far as possible to avoid the art of cheating. So then and there, it hit me.
OMG EARTHQUAKE. It was the strongest and longest earthquake I've felt in my lifetime. I was so scared that my heart was pounding out my chest and my hands were quivering like a wet dog. I honestly thought it was the end of the world. And images of the school building collapsing and students running for their lives flashed in my head. It didn't help either that students from the other sections were screaming. I think my classmates were too nerdy to give a damn and they went on with answering the test so I did the same. And I thought my "I'm going to die" ordeal was finished when the quake stopped after 10 seconds.
It never did.
Everytime I feel like my world is shaking, I panic. Like when a giant truck drives by and I'm standing on some rickety floor that shakes, I feel like I'm going to die.
It has gotten worse.
I conjure several kinds of illnesses that I might possibly possess like having diabetes or worms in my stomach with even just the slightest symptoms.
Everytime I hear things fall or crash in the next room, I immediately think someone has collapsed and have to rush that person to the hospital.
When airplanes fly low over the car I'm riding, or the roof I'm under, I believe it's going to crash ON me.
When family members aren't home when they're suppose to, I imagine all sorts of kidnapping or hold-up scenarios that might have happened.
I constantly scare myself and it's not funny at all.
I've turned out to become this completely neurotic freakshow.
And it sucks.
AUGH,