Regulars, the bane of my existence
I work at a fairly large bakery cafe chain and there are a ton of regulars that come in every single day. For the most part, these are some of the sweetest people. They know our names (and we know theirs) and they're fairly awesome. But there is a handful of them that think because they come in every day, they own the place and have every right to complain, bitch, be rude and belittle us. I'll cut all the stories, since they get a bit lengthy.
1. There's Margaret, the tiny old lady who comes in every day for a cup of coffee and a bear claw. Every day we get to hear the tale of how the Hazelnut coffee has lost it's flavor, and that our company is just going down the shitter. The bear claws are ALWAYS too flat, the coffee is ALWAYS too cold, and there's always the "YOU SAW ME COMING IN THE DOOR WHY IS MY FOOD NOT READY NOOOOOW!?!?"
Well, when you drink Hazelnut coffee every day for six years, you're going to get used to the taste. The bear claws are baked overnight, and guess what? They are also subject to gravity and will not be as big and as fluffy as they are at 6am when you order one at 11am. Oh, and see those 900 people in line waiting to get breakfast? You don't get to skip all of them because you come in every day and spend 4 bucks. Also, if we suck that much, stop coming in. I know I'd be happy.
2. Then there's Lloyd, who is a total jerk. All he ever gets is a large coffee and some times a sandwich to go. Your chances of getting cussed out by him (for no reason, really) is about 60%. I got told I was a "fucking moron" because the first time I rang him up, all he ordered was a coffee. I guess I was supposed to telepathically know he wanted a Large. Sorry that my powers aren't up to par, Lloyd.
3. And now, The Law Dude. Nobody knows his name because we don't give a fuck about this guy. I could write hundreds of stories about him, but I don't want to waste my time. He's in law school, so we like to think he's practicing being a douche bag. All of the cashiers have been called names, cussed out, yelled at... you name it he's done it. Our manager asked him to leave once because he was being so rude to the dining room attendant. THEN he had the nerve to come in the next day and be even more of a jerk ass. Fuck you, law dude.
4. And Fay, I've written about you in this community before, you fucking bitch. She always tries to cheat the system by ordering a small latte, and actually wanting extra espresso, extra coffee, extra whip cream OH YEAH AND FROZEN. Grrrr, I hate her.
5. And saving the last (but not least) is Joyce. Joyce has a standing bagel order for every Friday morning at 6am. She is a nurse, and arrives at the store at 5:45 every week. At 5:45, we're still setting out pastries, making OJ and prettifying the place. Joyce is such a bitch, she just stands at the door giving laser death eyes to the openers until we let her in. She always complains about how we should let her in early so she can leave, and Sophia (the manager) always tells her "I would get fired if I let you in earlier than 6am." Joyce literally says "I don't care, don't you appreciate my business?"
I have had two altercations with Joyce. The first, when I made her order, I forgot to put the ONE everything bagel in a separate. I should have done this, but to be fair it was only my third or fourth week and I didn't know that we ALWAYS put the Everything bagel in a separate bag. I just thought we did it if someone asked. So anyway, she gets her order and flips a fucking lid. I am cashing out other people, so poor Lori got the brunt of her huffing and puffing. She demanded a whole new order, then bitched Lori out for taking too long to slice and pack another 13 bagels.
The second time was the first time I had ever opened by myself on a Friday morning. Shannon brought out the call in orders, and there were three. The third one said "Joyce" on it. I thought to myself "Oh, Shannon brought out Joyce's too. Awesome!" You can tell where this is going... it was a different Joyce. So when the mean nasty Joyce came in, she flipped her lid and started cussing and screaming. She went to Shannon while I was making her bagel pack and told her how much of an incompetent human being I was, and that Shannon must hire idiots because shit like that always happens, and that we'll be lucky if she even comes back and that (I QUOTE) "If you don't give me my bagel pack for free today, I am calling the police on this establishment."
Anyway, Shannon gave it to her that day and Joyce has been back every Friday for the past two months since that happened. She is a fucking bitch and I so want to just spit on all her bagels... just once!
1. There's Margaret, the tiny old lady who comes in every day for a cup of coffee and a bear claw. Every day we get to hear the tale of how the Hazelnut coffee has lost it's flavor, and that our company is just going down the shitter. The bear claws are ALWAYS too flat, the coffee is ALWAYS too cold, and there's always the "YOU SAW ME COMING IN THE DOOR WHY IS MY FOOD NOT READY NOOOOOW!?!?"
Well, when you drink Hazelnut coffee every day for six years, you're going to get used to the taste. The bear claws are baked overnight, and guess what? They are also subject to gravity and will not be as big and as fluffy as they are at 6am when you order one at 11am. Oh, and see those 900 people in line waiting to get breakfast? You don't get to skip all of them because you come in every day and spend 4 bucks. Also, if we suck that much, stop coming in. I know I'd be happy.
2. Then there's Lloyd, who is a total jerk. All he ever gets is a large coffee and some times a sandwich to go. Your chances of getting cussed out by him (for no reason, really) is about 60%. I got told I was a "fucking moron" because the first time I rang him up, all he ordered was a coffee. I guess I was supposed to telepathically know he wanted a Large. Sorry that my powers aren't up to par, Lloyd.
3. And now, The Law Dude. Nobody knows his name because we don't give a fuck about this guy. I could write hundreds of stories about him, but I don't want to waste my time. He's in law school, so we like to think he's practicing being a douche bag. All of the cashiers have been called names, cussed out, yelled at... you name it he's done it. Our manager asked him to leave once because he was being so rude to the dining room attendant. THEN he had the nerve to come in the next day and be even more of a jerk ass. Fuck you, law dude.
4. And Fay, I've written about you in this community before, you fucking bitch. She always tries to cheat the system by ordering a small latte, and actually wanting extra espresso, extra coffee, extra whip cream OH YEAH AND FROZEN. Grrrr, I hate her.
5. And saving the last (but not least) is Joyce. Joyce has a standing bagel order for every Friday morning at 6am. She is a nurse, and arrives at the store at 5:45 every week. At 5:45, we're still setting out pastries, making OJ and prettifying the place. Joyce is such a bitch, she just stands at the door giving laser death eyes to the openers until we let her in. She always complains about how we should let her in early so she can leave, and Sophia (the manager) always tells her "I would get fired if I let you in earlier than 6am." Joyce literally says "I don't care, don't you appreciate my business?"
I have had two altercations with Joyce. The first, when I made her order, I forgot to put the ONE everything bagel in a separate. I should have done this, but to be fair it was only my third or fourth week and I didn't know that we ALWAYS put the Everything bagel in a separate bag. I just thought we did it if someone asked. So anyway, she gets her order and flips a fucking lid. I am cashing out other people, so poor Lori got the brunt of her huffing and puffing. She demanded a whole new order, then bitched Lori out for taking too long to slice and pack another 13 bagels.
The second time was the first time I had ever opened by myself on a Friday morning. Shannon brought out the call in orders, and there were three. The third one said "Joyce" on it. I thought to myself "Oh, Shannon brought out Joyce's too. Awesome!" You can tell where this is going... it was a different Joyce. So when the mean nasty Joyce came in, she flipped her lid and started cussing and screaming. She went to Shannon while I was making her bagel pack and told her how much of an incompetent human being I was, and that Shannon must hire idiots because shit like that always happens, and that we'll be lucky if she even comes back and that (I QUOTE) "If you don't give me my bagel pack for free today, I am calling the police on this establishment."
Anyway, Shannon gave it to her that day and Joyce has been back every Friday for the past two months since that happened. She is a fucking bitch and I so want to just spit on all her bagels... just once!