Oh Lord.
The next two days following the Perkins showdown, I wore that gray Bishp Kenny Wrestling shirt. I've never felt so close to my past. I've never mourned with an object that in itself brought so much pain and anger yet so much comfort. I denied his love because I loved someone else. I now know what those nights are when he stayed up all night wondering what I was doing, ever so hurting for something as small as a call. I know what Christmas was like knowing he loved me and I fucked my ex who really wasn't. I now know how cold hearted I was because I knew what in the end I wanted. I'm so forgiving now. So understanding. I learn what compassion is. What it truley is like to not judge. To remain calm. To be mature.
To be stupid.
To be stupid.