Lullabies For The Lost, Smallville, Chloe & Lana, Lossall_you_wantedApril 9 2007, 13:52:01 UTC
She felt numb. Empty inside.
She had felt this way ever since waking up in the hospital and learning she had lost her baby.
"Lana?"
Her back was too her, but Lana heard Chloe tentatively call from the doorway of her bedroom.
Lex was worried about her and seemed to not understand the weight of her grief.
Just like he didn't understand why she refused to eat and why sleep would never come for her.
Night after night she did try to sleep, but when she closed her eyes, all she saw was that tiny blurry face staring back at her.
She was also beginning to feel the outline of her ribs beneath her shirt.
Lana had known it would only be a matter of time before Lex called in the 'best friend' reinforcements.
The bed dipped as she climbed in behind her.
"Lex told me about the miscarriage." Chloe spoke to the back of her head, her hand gently stroking her hair. "I'm sorry."
Lana didn't reply, her own hand running over the fuzzy nap of the fabric covering the small bear in her grasp. The bear had once sat in the crib in the nursery.
It was the last reminder in the house of the baby. When she gone into the nursery this morning it was once again another empty room in the castle filled with old things once owned by famous dead people. Lex had had the toys and clothes and furniture removed during the night and the walls painted.
He thought 'out of sight, out of mind', was better, though it never left her mind.
"Lex tells me I've got to let go and get over this, but I don't think I can." She rolled over to face her friend.
Chloe lay beside her, head on pillow. It reminded Lana of simpler times, of sneaking into each others bed late at night to talk in hushed tones about their dreams or gossip about boys and schools, or rather one boy in particular.
Only their lives were far from the simple and carefree of 16 anymore and they never talked about that boy anymore.
"Come're" Chloe lay back and motioned for Lana to come into her outstretched arms. She did, laying her head against her warm body and letting Chloe wrap her arms around her in a loving embrace. She combed out the ratted dark lengths of hair with her fingers, making Lana sigh at the simple comfort of being touched.
Lana had often wondered if it was because Chloe had lived with mother longer than her, that made her excel at being the more maternal of the two of them.
For all her business suits and ambition, Lana always knew that Chloe would make a good mom. She had the instinct and the heart to be like a Martha Kent, or like her own mother had been.
A kind of mother she had hoped to be.
"Do you think..." Lana whispered quietly. "...It's possible I lost my baby because I didn't love it enough?"
The hand in her hair stilled.
"No."
Lana released the breath she had been holding waiting for her response and the hand began moving again. "I think that some times bad things just happen in the world and it's no ones fault."
"I loved my baby." She sniffled and crying, turned her head into Chloe's chest. "I really did."
"I know you did." Lana felt the stirring of air against her head as Chloe placed a kiss in her hair.
"I know you did."
* * *
Lex watched from the door way the two women entwined on his bed.
"Half of what I say is meaningless."
He recalled hearing his mother singing the familiar song to his brother, once upon a different life.
But I say it just to reach you..."
Any other time, he would have laughed at the idea of Miss Hard Nosed Journalist, Chloe Sullivan singing a lullaby.
"...Ocean child, calls me."
But with his wife currently laying curled around her, Lex was thankful and silent.
"Seashell eye, windy smile, calls me."
For the first time in a week, Lana looked at peace.
Re: Lullabies For The Lost, Smallville, Chloe & Lana, Lossellie06April 9 2007, 22:22:00 UTC
*Wipes away tear* That was lovely. Although I'm not a Lana fan or even much of a Chlana friendship fan, I do see the potential. And this was a wonderful piece highlighting what I wish we could see more of on the show.
She had felt this way ever since waking up in the hospital and learning she had lost her baby.
"Lana?"
Her back was too her, but Lana heard Chloe tentatively call from the doorway of her bedroom.
Lex was worried about her and seemed to not understand the weight of her grief.
Just like he didn't understand why she refused to eat and why sleep would never come for her.
Night after night she did try to sleep, but when she closed her eyes, all she saw was that tiny blurry face staring back at her.
She was also beginning to feel the outline of her ribs beneath her shirt.
Lana had known it would only be a matter of time before Lex called in the 'best friend' reinforcements.
The bed dipped as she climbed in behind her.
"Lex told me about the miscarriage." Chloe spoke to the back of her head, her hand gently stroking her hair. "I'm sorry."
Lana didn't reply, her own hand running over the fuzzy nap of the fabric covering the small bear in her grasp. The bear had once sat in the crib in the nursery.
It was the last reminder in the house of the baby. When she gone into the nursery this morning it was once again another empty room in the castle filled with old things once owned by famous dead people. Lex had had the toys and clothes and furniture removed during the night and the walls painted.
He thought 'out of sight, out of mind', was better, though it never left her mind.
"Lex tells me I've got to let go and get over this, but I don't think I can." She rolled over to face her friend.
Chloe lay beside her, head on pillow. It reminded Lana of simpler times, of sneaking into each others bed late at night to talk in hushed tones about their dreams or gossip about boys and schools, or rather one boy in particular.
Only their lives were far from the simple and carefree of 16 anymore and they never talked about that boy anymore.
"Come're" Chloe lay back and motioned for Lana to come into her outstretched arms. She did, laying her head against her warm body and letting Chloe wrap her arms around her in a loving embrace. She combed out the ratted dark lengths of hair with her fingers, making Lana sigh at the simple comfort of being touched.
Lana had often wondered if it was because Chloe had lived with mother longer than her, that made her excel at being the more maternal of the two of them.
For all her business suits and ambition, Lana always knew that Chloe would make a good mom. She had the instinct and the heart to be like a Martha Kent, or like her own mother had been.
A kind of mother she had hoped to be.
"Do you think..." Lana whispered quietly. "...It's possible I lost my baby because I didn't love it enough?"
The hand in her hair stilled.
"No."
Lana released the breath she had been holding waiting for her response and the hand began moving again. "I think that some times bad things just happen in the world and it's no ones fault."
"I loved my baby." She sniffled and crying, turned her head into Chloe's chest. "I really did."
"I know you did." Lana felt the stirring of air against her head as Chloe placed a kiss in her hair.
"I know you did."
* * *
Lex watched from the door way the two women entwined on his bed.
"Half of what I say is meaningless."
He recalled hearing his mother singing the familiar song to his brother, once upon a different life.
But I say it just to reach you..."
Any other time, he would have laughed at the idea of Miss Hard Nosed Journalist, Chloe Sullivan singing a lullaby.
"...Ocean child, calls me."
But with his wife currently laying curled around her, Lex was thankful and silent.
"Seashell eye, windy smile, calls me."
For the first time in a week, Lana looked at peace.
"So I sing a song of love for, Julia."
...And to be asleep.
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Kewl! :D
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Great job :D
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Thanks.
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