'Place your needle to the record stab it down. It feels good to be the one to break the skin now'
Spent the day ushering for the CYO. More confusing feelings... WTF, right? Right. Uhm, the ushering was fine, got to see Becky whom I haven't seen really since Phase II. At the first show we ushered, sat in front of Brett and it hurt to look at him with Beth Reil sitting right next to him, but it hurt not to look at him... Damn emotions. After the first show I was talking to Brett and his basement flooded, so I offered to help him clean his room (which is in the basement) after work tomorrow. Anyways, after we cleaned we went to lunch (me and Becky) then headed back to the Stadium. Started collecting tickets for the next show and Brett came by so I claimed the seat next to him and he said that if someone else took the seat there was nothing he could do. Well we got to sit and I sat next to him. Of course this event was about 3 hrs long and began with a concert. By the end of the concert, I was feeling pretty sleepy. He was tired too after about 4 hours of sleep. So by the end of the concert and the begining of the speaker who was right after her, he and I were just like whatever, talking really quietly, falling asleep. I kept laying my head on his shoulder and just fell asleep a few times, and he fell asleep at points too. Someone asked me if he was comfy and I said yeah, and he replied 'I know I'm comfy, I sleep with myself every night' That brought on the giggles from me and the other girl. I just enjoyed being near him, and sitting with my head on his shoulder I wasn't as cold and his scent and steady breathing just calmed me, made me feel safe, elated. After the talk it took so much effort to not cry. I really do love him, don't I? After that, he hung around til we were done cleaning and we kept hugging, and I gave him candy which made him happy. Each time we hugged, I didn't want to let go, just wanted to stay like that and just tell him how I feel again, even though he alread knows. We finally split when he had to go back to the CYO and I had to walk home in the rain with no umbrella. He said 'If I had a car I'd give you a ride no problem.' But he dosen't so I left and he headed back to the center. On my way home I got drenched and this guy offered me a ride, kept offering me one and wouldn't leave me alone. I had noo clue who the hell he was, but I was glad he left me alone. Round 5 called Brett to tell him I made it home so he wouldn't worry, and to talk. He... was like, good you got home, bad you almost got kidnapped, yay you're dry now. But I called him and he's like 'I'm not eating yet. You called me in the middle of changing. I felt really bad, he's like don't be sorry. He has to always tell me to not worry or not be sorry. And I listen... and I believe him when he makes a promise to me. God I'm such a school girl and I'm so over myself with love it's not funny. What do I do....?