i just wanna show you what i know
i forgot to talk about visiting the pet crematory on tuesday night. so, i visited a pet crematory on tuesday night. working at the vet clinic has made me sort of glib about the deaths of pets. so i'll put the rest behind a cut:
first of all, a lot of people from work went as the owner of the place is trying to fuck my boss so she keeps inviting us out so she can build up the business relationship. anyway, we were promised snacks and beer, so i said i'd go. the actual place is just like any other funeral home i've ever been to. very clean and homey. it was decorated with lots of cat and dog art. the only oddities were all the urns lining the walls. on the coffee table in the main room, there were a dozen kids books about how little fluffy has gone to cat heaven.
the owner, l, gave us a tour, and we saw the cremation chamber. there wasn't anything grim or dark about it. it's was a lot like those huge professional pizza ovens. complete with brick stone inside and the long-handled spatulas.
i learned one thing about cremation - that once your body comes out of the oven, there are bones, not ashes. they take the bones, and put them in a "cremated remains processor," or bone blender, and the crunched up bones are what you get in your urn. l explained to us that things like the metal pins they put in hips or other broken bones and the metal plates they use to repair skull fractures don't burn either. she also told us that a pacemakers explode in the cremation chamber, so we have to make sure we tell her if any of our clients' pets have them in.
other fun facts: it takes about 45 minutes to cremate a 10 lb cat but it take 4 hours to cremate a 250 lb boar and that boar will smell like a roasting ham when you do it.
kathleen asked me if i were planning to cremate pippin and keep his little fattycat ashes, and right now i really think i would. not all of them, but maybe some in a pendant or something. she seemed pretty appalled, but i think you'd have to be a pet owner to understand that.
FIVE THINGS THAT AREN'T WRETCH
1. lesser evil black & white chocolatey kettle corn
2. travis from gym class heroes.
3. [the hush sounds - don't wake me up] from like vines.
4. ham on the street on food network.
5. downloading new rings tones to my phone. last downloaded there's a good reason these tables are numbered, honey, you just haven't thought of it yet by panic! at the disco.
first of all, a lot of people from work went as the owner of the place is trying to fuck my boss so she keeps inviting us out so she can build up the business relationship. anyway, we were promised snacks and beer, so i said i'd go. the actual place is just like any other funeral home i've ever been to. very clean and homey. it was decorated with lots of cat and dog art. the only oddities were all the urns lining the walls. on the coffee table in the main room, there were a dozen kids books about how little fluffy has gone to cat heaven.
the owner, l, gave us a tour, and we saw the cremation chamber. there wasn't anything grim or dark about it. it's was a lot like those huge professional pizza ovens. complete with brick stone inside and the long-handled spatulas.
i learned one thing about cremation - that once your body comes out of the oven, there are bones, not ashes. they take the bones, and put them in a "cremated remains processor," or bone blender, and the crunched up bones are what you get in your urn. l explained to us that things like the metal pins they put in hips or other broken bones and the metal plates they use to repair skull fractures don't burn either. she also told us that a pacemakers explode in the cremation chamber, so we have to make sure we tell her if any of our clients' pets have them in.
other fun facts: it takes about 45 minutes to cremate a 10 lb cat but it take 4 hours to cremate a 250 lb boar and that boar will smell like a roasting ham when you do it.
kathleen asked me if i were planning to cremate pippin and keep his little fattycat ashes, and right now i really think i would. not all of them, but maybe some in a pendant or something. she seemed pretty appalled, but i think you'd have to be a pet owner to understand that.
FIVE THINGS THAT AREN'T WRETCH
1. lesser evil black & white chocolatey kettle corn
2. travis from gym class heroes.
3. [the hush sounds - don't wake me up] from like vines.
4. ham on the street on food network.
5. downloading new rings tones to my phone. last downloaded there's a good reason these tables are numbered, honey, you just haven't thought of it yet by panic! at the disco.