[Fic] (What Should Be Kept) Behind Locked Doors
Title: (What Should Be Kept) Behind Locked Doors
Rating: PG13, M
Category: Romance/General
Pairing(s): HikaruKaoru centric
Warnings: Yaoi (slash), incest (of the twin-cest variety), minor sexual content, and a lot of bad writing. Not beta read.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. If they were, they would be porn stars... believe me.
Author’s Notes: This fic was written just after Episode 10 of the anime. I have not read, or seen, any further, so bear with any inaccuracies. I warn you-this has not been beta read. I did, however, go back and add a small translation key at the end when I realized I’d worked in some random Japanese.
Summary: They never expected misunderstandings and miscommunication between identical minds. Sometimes you know you’re being unreasonable, but you just can’t stop. Twincest. HikaruKaoru.
X-posted on ouran_fanfics, ouranhostclub, hikaruxkaoru, and FFN.
-=+=-
It didn’t really matter how it had started. It was just very, very hard to stop.
One of the customers mentioned what Kaoru had said during their ‘fight’ several times, recalling his accusation that Hikaru liked Haruhi. They had been playing the twin-love game long enough to know a cue when they saw one, and Kaoru fell into the role of torn lover without a thought.
“I... I just want him to be happy,” he said, his voice thin as he lowered his gaze. The girls squealed, whispering about how wonderful their love for each other was, theories about how Haruhi played into it all bursting to life, “even if... if it’s not with me...”
Hikaru did not disappoint him, pulling him to his feet before anyone could figure out how and when he’d gotten around the table. Hikaru held his twin up with one arm, resting his fingers against his brother’s hip, the other hand balancing him at the small of his back.
“Kaoru no baka(1)... Haruhi is just a friend... I like him, but... not the way I love you...” Kaoru flushed as his brother’s fingers traveled up his spine, coming to rest on the back of his head, forcing him to look up at him, “I thought you knew that...”
“Hikaru...”
And, much to Haruhi’s chagrin, it became the twins’ new theme.
-=+=-
Why they were so persistent on the topic, Haruhi could not figure out. Usually the twins grew bored of things quickly, yet it had been three weeks and they were still playing off of the ‘triangle relationship’. She decided to try to bear it, though, because her designations were on the rise thanks to the rumors, many of the girls making appointments with Haruhi just to ask about the twins. Renge-chan and Kyoya-sempai also seemed to encourage their behavior, the former saying that conflict was wonderful, and Kyoya-sempai… just smiling in a scary manner as he scribbled away on his clipboard.
The only one that was in strong opposition, of course... was Tamaki.
“Mommy! How can you let these lewd rumors continue about our daughter? We can’t let her be paired off with those devils!” He said on a daily basis, drawing less and less response as the days passed. Even with the King’s constant nagging, the twins persisted.
“Kaoru...? What’s wrong?” Today they’d been sitting next to each other, across from their customers, and Hikaru’s arms were around his twin before the younger redhead had finished sighing.
“It’s nothing...” He had a light tint to his cheeks, avoiding his twin’s gaze as he started to pull away. Hikaru did not let him get far, holding his chin between his thumb and forefinger, making him look up at him as his free arm pulled their chests together.
“I can tell something’s wrong, Kaoru... please, tell me?” A chestnut haired girl across the table gulped, looking about two minutes away from exploding with screams. The twins, though, paid no mind to her. Hikaru had drawn his younger brother so close that he’d forced him to nearly straddle him, holding him firmly, refusing to let go or look away.
“...you were... were looking at Haruhi again...” Just like the bashful, hurt lover, Kaoru glanced away immediately, his voice wavering as he spoke. The cross dressing girl in question rolled her eyes at it all, but had to smile as her own designation asked how she felt about the twins.
“I never looked away from your beautiful face, Kaoru...” it was a wonder that so few people caught onto the fact that... whenever Hikaru praised his twin’s face... he was basically complimenting himself, “why won’t you believe me?”
Kaoru flushed, his eyes watering, the very epitome of a troubled love.
It didn’t really matter how it had started. It was just very, very hard to stop... in, or outside of the host game.
“Datte(2)...” he whispered, the word accusing in itself. Kaoru tried to turn his face away, making the girls sigh at their tragic romance.
-=+=-
Hikaru had heard once that it was impossible to please a woman. Say one thing and they cry; say the opposite and they scream. Recently, he’d been getting the feeling that there was, indeed, a reason that Kaoru played the uke(3) in their game.
“Kaoru...” they weren’t even at school and his twin seemed to be playing the host game. He sighed, looking down where Kaoru was reading a manga, his back to him.
“Kaoru-kun...” he said in a slightly more playful way, getting on his knees next to the bed so he could rest his arms on the mattress, leaning in close to him, “Kaoru-chann...”
Nothing.
At least at school Kaoru would talk to him and act the way the Hitachiin twins were known to.
“Come on! You’ve been ignoring me for four hours...” He pulled himself halfway onto the bed with his arms, laying on his side so he could face his brother and stare at him. Kaoru, though, was having none of it. His eyes were set firmly on the book, and Hikaru felt something restless in himself at that.
It was happening more and more. His twin would ignore him, and he felt some tugging sensation in his veins.
“Kaoruuu... I’m boreddd...” He reached up and flicked Kaoru’s bangs out of his eyes, not even getting a blink. He just couldn’t figure out what he’d done to piss his twin off. He’d never not-known what his brother was thinking, and suddenly he was up against his verbal, physical, and mental block.
“Kaoruuuu.. .”
Hikaru had never been very good at reading between the lines.
Math, as once mentioned, was really more his style.
-=+=-
“Hima(4)...” he muttered, chin resting on his crossed arms, settled in over his desk.
“What?” Haruhi didn’t quite hear what Hikaru had said and blinked at him. The twins were on both sides of her. For the last few days, Kaoru would wait for Hikaru to take a seat before choosing a desk away from him. At first she’d thought it was weird, and then she figured that it was probably Phase Two of their ‘Triangle’ game.
“I’m bored! ” He said more clearly, a bit too loudly. The teacher’s sharp eyes honed in on the miserable looking redhead.
“Hitachiin-san... while I am terribly sorry that my class... bores you... I would appreciate if you kept your comments to yourself... but if you insist on interrupting me, we can have a nice chat after class...”
-=+=-
Not only did Tachibana-sensei give him a lecture... but when he arrived late to the club, Kyoya had given him a viciously passive tongue lashing for being an embarrassment to the host club. Hikaru’s day was proving to be more than unpleasant, and it didn’t help that, it seemed, Kaoru had been earnestly flirting with the girls in lieu of their twin act. He felt his stomach convulse and his body heat in an unpleasant way, finding himself strangely annoyed with how his twin’s arm was draped over Minamino-san’s shoulder. He blamed it on his less than perfect day.
It wasn’t fair, after all, that his mirror image be having such a good day while he was miserable.
If Kaoru hadn’t been such a good host, he probably would have allowed personal matters to get in the way of their game. As it was, though, he was a pro through and through.
“Hikaru!” Basketball meant quick feet, and if the school team were to ever get wind of the lightning speed those feet could move at... they would no doubt try to recruit the twins. Kaoru was at his brother’s side, fingers clinging to the front of his uniform, the very embodiment of desperate worry, “are... are you okay? Was Tachibana-sensei... hard on you?”
Hikaru almost wanted to throw the towel in. He wanted to tell him that yes, the damn woman had been nothing short of a bitch... but his body had other ideas. He found his arm wrapping itself firmly around Kaoru’s body, the niggling feeling in his stomach abating a little. One hand lost itself in his little brother’s hair, amber eyes closing dramatically as he buried his nose against red locks.
“She...” he let a little tremor go through him, at which Kaoru’s grasp on his shirt tightened, “...it was okay... I... I just kept thinking about... about you...”
“Hikaru...!”
They were just acting, just playing, he knew that. It was what they always did, and when they got home Kaoru would probably stop talking to him again for reasons he still didn’t know. But with his twin so close to him and whispering nonsense at him, even if it was just to make the girls hyperventilate, he felt his body relax. He could breathe a little easier, and his breaths carried to him the scent of something citrus and something that was just his brother.
-=+=-
Weeks. Weeks. Not just a week. But weeks. Kaoru had been giving him the silent treatment at home for weeks now. The servants, mother, and even father had noticed. When mother asked why they weren’t speaking, his twin had given an answer that had made Hikaru’s stomach jump, drop, and hurt like hell for hours.
“We’re just separating naturally, I guess.”
Naturally? Ignoring your other half’s existence was natural? Hikaru felt absolutely dejected the rest of the day and did not even try to cajole his brother into speaking to him.
The next day, however, was completely different. Shock had worn off and now he was... well, he couldn’t pinpoint what it was, but he felt a mixture of annoyance and anger and hurt.
But even like that, they acted the same at school. It would be a lie to say that their game hadn’t gotten more intense; their exchanges were a bit more personal now and went far less smoothly.
“Well... mother’s always said we should make other friends...” Kaoru said, his voice very soft, “and... I wouldn’t want to keep Hikaru from being happy...”
“Oh, Kaoru-kun! You’re so sweet! Your love for your brother is so...” before, they would have just let the girls go on. They would have played it all out gracefully, but Hikaru was on edge lately.
“Demo(5) ... Kaoru... I need you with me to be happy...” Before any of them could take a breath, Kaoru had been swept to his feet, held tightly within his twin’s arms. Though he’d interrupted the girls, it seemed that their more passionate plays were even more popular.
“Kyaaa!(6) They’re both so cute... such wonderful love between brothers...” Miyako-san and Andou-san were too far into fan girl mode to notice the slightly uncomfortable way Kaoru fidgeted against his brother.
-=+=-
It was a Wednesday when it happened. The tension between the twins had been growing like some parasite on the club, annoying Kyoya to no end and infuriating Tamaki in that they perpetually involved Haruhi. It grew almost painful to watch how insistent Kaoru was that Hikaru should move on and be happy, and sort of scary watching Hikaru insist differently.
“But you would be happier with him!”
“No I wouldn’t! ”
The part of it that was visually terrifying was that they still clung to each other as tradition ordained. Hikaru’s fingers cupped his twin’s face, his arms holding him close, and Kaoru was still clutching at his brother. Yet as the argument continued, Kaoru’s grasp would tighten to the point that his knuckles looked white. Hunny-sempai’s eyes wobbled as he said he was afraid Hikaru was going to break Kaoru’s back, he was holding him so harshly. When they separated, the younger twin often had fingerprints on his face, and Hikaru’s uniform had wrinkles in the shapes of hands.
“Kowai(7)...” the customers started to whisper, a little blue in the face. The twins actually started to drive customers away because they started to involve the girls more and more often. After they’d separate, Kaoru would often ‘seek comfort’ in one of the girls... who would quickly be faced with a very, very unhappy Hikaru.
“Hitachiin!” Kyoya’s voice was nearly a growl, his glasses glinting in a way that signified that he was glaring at them from beyond the glass, “I’m charging you with how many customers you’re costing us...”
But no matter how Kyoya threatened...
It was just very, very hard to stop.
But, on Wednesday, there was a definite screeching pause.
-=+=-
“You were looking at Haruhi again,” Kaoru muttered, his tone nonchalant but his fingers flipping the pages to a fashion magazine callously. It had become a most unpleasant pattern, and Hikaru was positive that he hadn’t been looking at Haruhi, because he’d made sure not to.
It was Wednesday, and Hikaru hadn’t gotten a good night’s sleep in a month. Without his twin’s comfortable warmth against him, he always woke up feeling groggy, and with the tension between them, the rest of his day felt sluggish. He’d spent the last few days adamantly ignoring Haruhi’s existence-not because he was mad at her, no, but because he’d thought that maybe there was merit to what his twin was saying. But no. No, he was sure that he hadn’t been looking at her today.
His eye twitched, and an anime style symbol of pure anger appeared just over his brow. That gnawing, clenching feeling in his stomach was back tenfold, his veins itching, his muscles tensing.
“You should just go talk to him already,” Kaoru continued, not noticing the look his twin was shooting him, “instead of pretending to ignore him... it’s pathetic, reall-”
Wednesday, April 20th, in Yamauchi-sensei’s homeroom class, at exactly 7:42:12AM, Room 2-B, Kaoru Hitachiin pushed just a little too hard.
7:42:14AM-fashion magazine flying to the ground.
7:42:15AM- ignoring physical limitations, Hikaru Hitachiin pins his brother to his desk.
7:42:17AM-a deafening, deafening silence.
7:44:03AM-gasps.
7:45:22AM-screams.
-=+=-
“You... you harlots! You floozy, shameless twins! What were you thinking? You-you-” Tamaki pointed his finger wildly, his face red, eyes wide in disbelief, “and in front of Haruhi! You unethical-you devils! Mommy, tell them-” Tamaki attached himself to Kyoya, eyes watery as one hand continued pointing in the general direction of the twins.
“Actually, their little scene has already earned back what they’ve been losing us over the weeks, plus some... in fact, the bidding for their erasers just jumped by 100,000 yen, and is still rising...”
“But... demo... they’re... they’re brothers-twins! ”
“Yes, that has been their selling point for two years now...”
“De... demo! They never... did that!”
“Hey-” Kaoru, blushing like mad, glared at the King, “it wasn’t my idea-don’t blame me!”
“Aa(8), so you didn’t plan it out,” Haruhi observed, not seeming to be phased at all.
Hikaru, meanwhile, seemed to be trying to hide behind one hand. He was colored red up to his ears, periodically shaking his head as though in denial.
“Nee (9),” Hunny-sempai tugged on Haruhi’s sleeve, tilting his head adorably, “was Hika-chan really the seme (10)?”
“Seme?”
“Etto (11)...” to the horror of everyone else, except maybe Mori, Hunny continued, “was Hika-chan the one that was on top?”
“Aa...” Haruhi tapped her pointer finger on her chin, looking up at the ceiling, “yes, he did have Kaoru pinned to the desk.”
“You prostitutes! You attention whores! Look what you’ve done! You’ve tainted Haruhi with your... your vulgar-vulgar... that... your... when you... your dirty, inappropriate...”
“Kiss,” Kyoya inserted, “is the word you are looking for, I believe.”
-=+=-
They didn’t talk about it on Wednesday. In fact, Kaoru locked himself in a separate room altogether, and left for school early on Thursday. By the time that Hikaru had dragged himself to the classroom, his twin was already practically plastered to the wall, cornered by a mob of girls asking, yelling, screaming, at such a degree and frequency that the foundation of the building seemed to shake around them.
“Yabe (12)!” The older redhead muttered, dropping his bag as the girls noticed him, their eyes glinting, terrifying him with just a glance. They were worse than Kyoya.
It was a physical reaction for him, honed through catching Kaoru just a hair before he fell, or protecting him from flying objects in gym class... he lunged forward, grabbed his twin’s arm, and parted the sea of girls as though he were Moses.
Then he ran like hell, sweating in terror as the mob followed them, Kaoru basically dragged behind him as he just ran.
-=+=-
The rest of the day consisted, surprisingly, of more running. They lunged. They dashed. They sprinted. They scrambled. At one point, they even jumped from the top of the building to a lower floor balcony. They were sweaty, tired, and paranoid by third hour, hiding in the back of a spare auditorium.
“This...” Kaoru panted, “is all... your fault...”
Hikaru was trying to push his damp hair out of his face, his back pressed to the wall, trying to regain his breath, “shut... up... if you hadn’t... provoked me...”
There were footsteps outside and both of them tried to breathe as silently as possible, eyes wide in fear as shadows passed across the sliver of light under the door. By some stroke of luck, some smile of the deity above them, the doorknob did not budge.
“Provoked? ” Kaoru continued, though in a quieter hiss this time, “I didn’t do anything! You’re the one-”
“Well maybe if you... had just let the Haruhi thing go...” Hikaru glared, though he was too tired to put much venom behind it.
“Me? I only brought it up because you kept staring at her!”
“For the last/ time-I was not staring at her! ”
“Oh please! You chase her with your eyes every chance you can get!”
“Are you blind? Or just stupid?” This wasn’t the direction Hikaru wanted to go in at all. It was just that, now that they were in this line of argument, it was neigh impossible to change the topic. It annoyed him that this was the only kind of conversation they’d been having for weeks down, made the pit of his stomach squirm and flip and churn.
“I was just trying to help you out, because you seemed too dense to do anything on your own!”
“Oh, to help me act naturally? Like, I don’t know... our ‘natural separation’?”
“Maybe if you just admit to yourself that you like Haruhi-”
“What is with you? Yes, I think she’s nice. Yes, I like her, but not the way you make it seem!”
“You’ve never liked a girl like you like her!”
“Because I’ve never had a female friend, you-you-”
“I haven’t, either, but I’m not drooling over her...”
“It’s not like that! Why are you so...”
“Well, then what is it?” If it weren’t so dark in the room, Hikaru would have noticed that, without teardrops, his twin’s eyes were moist. But as it was, all he could tell was that Kaoru’s voice was shaking, and he assumed it was out of anger.
“It’s... I don’t... I don’t like her like I like you-” at that, Kaoru glared at him and the little light that crept in from under the door glinted off his eyes.
“Don’t feed me the same lines you sold to our customers!”
“I’m not! I was being honest! You wouldn’t even talk to me outside of school, so I...”
But his twin wasn’t looking at him anymore. Hikaru felt his body ache, that burning feeling running through him as he just knew his brother didn’t believe him. He’d spent all night regretting it, berating himself for being so rash as to kiss his twin, but that didn’t stop him from doing it again.
With perfect timing, a throng of girls burst through the door to see Kaoru pushed back against the wall, his brother’s hands holding his head in place as he engaged them in a different battle of the tongues altogether.
After that, they didn’t even have time to talk... By the time they’d locked the gates to their mansion, they were both utterly exhausted, hiding in the back, back, back room of their home, panting to regain their breaths. They could still hear the phantom screams of girls ringing in their ears, and the sensation remained for a few minutes.
“...”
“...”
Hikaru glanced at his twin, feeling a bit embarrassed and uncertain of himself, expecting Kaoru to start yell him again.
“...you...” his younger brother started, and just as Hikaru braced himself for verbal abuse, Kaoru burst out laughing, “...have the worst timing.”
They stared at each other for a few moments before they both dissolved into laughter.
-=+=-
They still hadn’t really talked about it. At school, they decided to keep a low profile for a few weeks, until the initial insanity died down a little. At home, they spent hours just sitting next to each other, holding hands like they always did, though their fingers were unbearably tense.
Saying that they maintained a platonic relationship before figuring things out was expecting too much of two teenagers. They would start to say something, then find theirs lips busy otherwise. After a while, they’d developed designated looks that meant they’d be making out in a matter of seconds.
Their lips knew each other, yet their hands fumbled more than they’d ever expected, clumsy and embarrassingly uncertain. More than once, Kaoru had fallen back against the bed to be met with a yelp, discovering that he’d just collapsed his entire weight on one of Hikaru’s unprepared limbs.
After so many years of ‘practice’, of smooth, flawless acting... they really should have been better adapted.
“Hikaru...” the older twin had learned, with delight, that he could make his brother release the strangest sounds, little mewls he’d never heard before. He discovered that his name could be said in many more ways than he’d thought. But this time, Kaoru’s tone told him to stop, and his wandering hands did, eyes flickering up to his other half cautiously.
“Hikaru... should... we should...”
“...talk,” he agreed, though he still wasn’t sure what that meant.
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...so... we probably shouldn’t... um... tell mom about this,” he started with the obvious.
“...yeah... probably not.”
“...”
“...”
“...did... why did you... were you ignoring me?” It tumbled past his lips, having been on his mind for all of those tense moments and sometimes, if all of his blood hadn’t rushed out of his brain, when they were touching. Hikaru still had his twin caught against the bed and felt him tense a little, but felt secure in that Kaoru could not escape.
“...”
“Nee?”
“...I was mad at you.”
“...”
“...because you like Haruhi...”
“I don’t-”
“Yes you do!”
“Not...” he took his twin’s hand, staring at the fingertips that were identical to his own, trying to clear his mind so that he could explain himself, “look... maybe... maybe if we weren’t twins, this... I really would like Haruhi like that. Maybe if I just met her and you weren’t here,” he pushed on despite the hurt look Kaoru gave him, “I’d really like her. But... but I do have you and I don’t see how anyone else... how my love for anyone else could be anything like the way I care for you.”
Hikaru wished he was better with words. It seemed that, along with his coordination, his speech was also severely impeded when it came to this new situation.
Kaoru just watched him and he felt nervous that he hadn’t gotten it across. He started to open his mouth again when his little brother just smiled, eyes lightening in a fashion he’d never imagined, much less seen, before.
And although it was a beautiful, wonderful smile, Hikaru was not above destroying it for another kiss. He knew that they were going to have a problem being discrete as he nipped at Kaoru’s bottom lip, bruising it before tilting his head enough to taste him comfortably. He was like liquid heat against his tongue, his lips, and he could taste a hint of spices, chased his brother’s teasing tongue back into his mouth.
He’d always thought that the people in movies, the actors, were just stupid. He’d never understood why they always came apart gasping for breath when they could breathe through their noses. But in a matter of minutes, he had to pull away, could feel Kaoru’s fingers trying to push him away and pull him closer in the same movement, could feel their hearts racing and their chests shuddering with need for air. He wasn’t sure when he’d closed his eyes, but he opened them as they separated, his fingers ghosting gently over flushed cheeks.
Though they didn’t dwell on it as much lately, the twins had always locked their door, even at home, before the Host Club. In that time when ‘Their World’ was all they knew and cared for, even their parents had to knock and sometimes plead to be let in.
”...did you lock the door?” Kaoru murmured breathlessly, eying the door warily as he thought he heard footprints.
“Yeah.”
It didn’t really matter how it had started. It was just very, very hard to stop.
-=+=-
Finis!
There were originally four more pages to this... wherein I tried to get them to smut, but I found this ending to be more effective. I may work the cut out parts into something else. Tell me if you’re interested ;) or just tell me what you thought. On another random note- anyone interested in one-on-one HK roleplay (not RPG)? Tell me if you are ;)
Key:
Here are some pretty basic terms... you probably knew most of them, but here they are anyways:
(1)Baka: Translates basically to ‘Idiot’ in this situation.
(2)Datte: ‘But...’ or ‘Well...’ (IE: Well, it wasn’t my idea)
(3)Uke: The term designated for ‘bottom’, usually used for same-sex relationships where gender does not decide who tops and who bottoms.
(4)Hima: ‘(I’m) bored...’
(5)Demo: ‘But...’
(6)Kyaa!: The screeching, unpleasant sound of Japanese fangirls screaming
(7)Kowai: ‘Scary...’
(8)Aa: ‘Oh.’
(9)Nee: ‘Umm...’ or something like ‘Hey...’ imposed just before a question (Ex: Hey, do you know where the cafeteria is?)
(10)Seme: The term designated for the ‘top’ in a relationship.
(11)Etto: ‘Umm...’ or “Uh...’
(12)Yabe: ‘Oh crap’, ‘Oh shit’, or the like.
Rating: PG13, M
Category: Romance/General
Pairing(s): HikaruKaoru centric
Warnings: Yaoi (slash), incest (of the twin-cest variety), minor sexual content, and a lot of bad writing. Not beta read.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Not mine. Not mine. If they were, they would be porn stars... believe me.
Author’s Notes: This fic was written just after Episode 10 of the anime. I have not read, or seen, any further, so bear with any inaccuracies. I warn you-this has not been beta read. I did, however, go back and add a small translation key at the end when I realized I’d worked in some random Japanese.
Summary: They never expected misunderstandings and miscommunication between identical minds. Sometimes you know you’re being unreasonable, but you just can’t stop. Twincest. HikaruKaoru.
X-posted on ouran_fanfics, ouranhostclub, hikaruxkaoru, and FFN.
-=+=-
It didn’t really matter how it had started. It was just very, very hard to stop.
One of the customers mentioned what Kaoru had said during their ‘fight’ several times, recalling his accusation that Hikaru liked Haruhi. They had been playing the twin-love game long enough to know a cue when they saw one, and Kaoru fell into the role of torn lover without a thought.
“I... I just want him to be happy,” he said, his voice thin as he lowered his gaze. The girls squealed, whispering about how wonderful their love for each other was, theories about how Haruhi played into it all bursting to life, “even if... if it’s not with me...”
Hikaru did not disappoint him, pulling him to his feet before anyone could figure out how and when he’d gotten around the table. Hikaru held his twin up with one arm, resting his fingers against his brother’s hip, the other hand balancing him at the small of his back.
“Kaoru no baka(1)... Haruhi is just a friend... I like him, but... not the way I love you...” Kaoru flushed as his brother’s fingers traveled up his spine, coming to rest on the back of his head, forcing him to look up at him, “I thought you knew that...”
“Hikaru...”
And, much to Haruhi’s chagrin, it became the twins’ new theme.
-=+=-
Why they were so persistent on the topic, Haruhi could not figure out. Usually the twins grew bored of things quickly, yet it had been three weeks and they were still playing off of the ‘triangle relationship’. She decided to try to bear it, though, because her designations were on the rise thanks to the rumors, many of the girls making appointments with Haruhi just to ask about the twins. Renge-chan and Kyoya-sempai also seemed to encourage their behavior, the former saying that conflict was wonderful, and Kyoya-sempai… just smiling in a scary manner as he scribbled away on his clipboard.
The only one that was in strong opposition, of course... was Tamaki.
“Mommy! How can you let these lewd rumors continue about our daughter? We can’t let her be paired off with those devils!” He said on a daily basis, drawing less and less response as the days passed. Even with the King’s constant nagging, the twins persisted.
“Kaoru...? What’s wrong?” Today they’d been sitting next to each other, across from their customers, and Hikaru’s arms were around his twin before the younger redhead had finished sighing.
“It’s nothing...” He had a light tint to his cheeks, avoiding his twin’s gaze as he started to pull away. Hikaru did not let him get far, holding his chin between his thumb and forefinger, making him look up at him as his free arm pulled their chests together.
“I can tell something’s wrong, Kaoru... please, tell me?” A chestnut haired girl across the table gulped, looking about two minutes away from exploding with screams. The twins, though, paid no mind to her. Hikaru had drawn his younger brother so close that he’d forced him to nearly straddle him, holding him firmly, refusing to let go or look away.
“...you were... were looking at Haruhi again...” Just like the bashful, hurt lover, Kaoru glanced away immediately, his voice wavering as he spoke. The cross dressing girl in question rolled her eyes at it all, but had to smile as her own designation asked how she felt about the twins.
“I never looked away from your beautiful face, Kaoru...” it was a wonder that so few people caught onto the fact that... whenever Hikaru praised his twin’s face... he was basically complimenting himself, “why won’t you believe me?”
Kaoru flushed, his eyes watering, the very epitome of a troubled love.
It didn’t really matter how it had started. It was just very, very hard to stop... in, or outside of the host game.
“Datte(2)...” he whispered, the word accusing in itself. Kaoru tried to turn his face away, making the girls sigh at their tragic romance.
-=+=-
Hikaru had heard once that it was impossible to please a woman. Say one thing and they cry; say the opposite and they scream. Recently, he’d been getting the feeling that there was, indeed, a reason that Kaoru played the uke(3) in their game.
“Kaoru...” they weren’t even at school and his twin seemed to be playing the host game. He sighed, looking down where Kaoru was reading a manga, his back to him.
“Kaoru-kun...” he said in a slightly more playful way, getting on his knees next to the bed so he could rest his arms on the mattress, leaning in close to him, “Kaoru-chann...”
Nothing.
At least at school Kaoru would talk to him and act the way the Hitachiin twins were known to.
“Come on! You’ve been ignoring me for four hours...” He pulled himself halfway onto the bed with his arms, laying on his side so he could face his brother and stare at him. Kaoru, though, was having none of it. His eyes were set firmly on the book, and Hikaru felt something restless in himself at that.
It was happening more and more. His twin would ignore him, and he felt some tugging sensation in his veins.
“Kaoruuu... I’m boreddd...” He reached up and flicked Kaoru’s bangs out of his eyes, not even getting a blink. He just couldn’t figure out what he’d done to piss his twin off. He’d never not-known what his brother was thinking, and suddenly he was up against his verbal, physical, and mental block.
“Kaoruuuu.. .”
Hikaru had never been very good at reading between the lines.
Math, as once mentioned, was really more his style.
-=+=-
“Hima(4)...” he muttered, chin resting on his crossed arms, settled in over his desk.
“What?” Haruhi didn’t quite hear what Hikaru had said and blinked at him. The twins were on both sides of her. For the last few days, Kaoru would wait for Hikaru to take a seat before choosing a desk away from him. At first she’d thought it was weird, and then she figured that it was probably Phase Two of their ‘Triangle’ game.
“I’m bored! ” He said more clearly, a bit too loudly. The teacher’s sharp eyes honed in on the miserable looking redhead.
“Hitachiin-san... while I am terribly sorry that my class... bores you... I would appreciate if you kept your comments to yourself... but if you insist on interrupting me, we can have a nice chat after class...”
-=+=-
Not only did Tachibana-sensei give him a lecture... but when he arrived late to the club, Kyoya had given him a viciously passive tongue lashing for being an embarrassment to the host club. Hikaru’s day was proving to be more than unpleasant, and it didn’t help that, it seemed, Kaoru had been earnestly flirting with the girls in lieu of their twin act. He felt his stomach convulse and his body heat in an unpleasant way, finding himself strangely annoyed with how his twin’s arm was draped over Minamino-san’s shoulder. He blamed it on his less than perfect day.
It wasn’t fair, after all, that his mirror image be having such a good day while he was miserable.
If Kaoru hadn’t been such a good host, he probably would have allowed personal matters to get in the way of their game. As it was, though, he was a pro through and through.
“Hikaru!” Basketball meant quick feet, and if the school team were to ever get wind of the lightning speed those feet could move at... they would no doubt try to recruit the twins. Kaoru was at his brother’s side, fingers clinging to the front of his uniform, the very embodiment of desperate worry, “are... are you okay? Was Tachibana-sensei... hard on you?”
Hikaru almost wanted to throw the towel in. He wanted to tell him that yes, the damn woman had been nothing short of a bitch... but his body had other ideas. He found his arm wrapping itself firmly around Kaoru’s body, the niggling feeling in his stomach abating a little. One hand lost itself in his little brother’s hair, amber eyes closing dramatically as he buried his nose against red locks.
“She...” he let a little tremor go through him, at which Kaoru’s grasp on his shirt tightened, “...it was okay... I... I just kept thinking about... about you...”
“Hikaru...!”
They were just acting, just playing, he knew that. It was what they always did, and when they got home Kaoru would probably stop talking to him again for reasons he still didn’t know. But with his twin so close to him and whispering nonsense at him, even if it was just to make the girls hyperventilate, he felt his body relax. He could breathe a little easier, and his breaths carried to him the scent of something citrus and something that was just his brother.
-=+=-
Weeks. Weeks. Not just a week. But weeks. Kaoru had been giving him the silent treatment at home for weeks now. The servants, mother, and even father had noticed. When mother asked why they weren’t speaking, his twin had given an answer that had made Hikaru’s stomach jump, drop, and hurt like hell for hours.
“We’re just separating naturally, I guess.”
Naturally? Ignoring your other half’s existence was natural? Hikaru felt absolutely dejected the rest of the day and did not even try to cajole his brother into speaking to him.
The next day, however, was completely different. Shock had worn off and now he was... well, he couldn’t pinpoint what it was, but he felt a mixture of annoyance and anger and hurt.
But even like that, they acted the same at school. It would be a lie to say that their game hadn’t gotten more intense; their exchanges were a bit more personal now and went far less smoothly.
“Well... mother’s always said we should make other friends...” Kaoru said, his voice very soft, “and... I wouldn’t want to keep Hikaru from being happy...”
“Oh, Kaoru-kun! You’re so sweet! Your love for your brother is so...” before, they would have just let the girls go on. They would have played it all out gracefully, but Hikaru was on edge lately.
“Demo(5) ... Kaoru... I need you with me to be happy...” Before any of them could take a breath, Kaoru had been swept to his feet, held tightly within his twin’s arms. Though he’d interrupted the girls, it seemed that their more passionate plays were even more popular.
“Kyaaa!(6) They’re both so cute... such wonderful love between brothers...” Miyako-san and Andou-san were too far into fan girl mode to notice the slightly uncomfortable way Kaoru fidgeted against his brother.
-=+=-
It was a Wednesday when it happened. The tension between the twins had been growing like some parasite on the club, annoying Kyoya to no end and infuriating Tamaki in that they perpetually involved Haruhi. It grew almost painful to watch how insistent Kaoru was that Hikaru should move on and be happy, and sort of scary watching Hikaru insist differently.
“But you would be happier with him!”
“No I wouldn’t! ”
The part of it that was visually terrifying was that they still clung to each other as tradition ordained. Hikaru’s fingers cupped his twin’s face, his arms holding him close, and Kaoru was still clutching at his brother. Yet as the argument continued, Kaoru’s grasp would tighten to the point that his knuckles looked white. Hunny-sempai’s eyes wobbled as he said he was afraid Hikaru was going to break Kaoru’s back, he was holding him so harshly. When they separated, the younger twin often had fingerprints on his face, and Hikaru’s uniform had wrinkles in the shapes of hands.
“Kowai(7)...” the customers started to whisper, a little blue in the face. The twins actually started to drive customers away because they started to involve the girls more and more often. After they’d separate, Kaoru would often ‘seek comfort’ in one of the girls... who would quickly be faced with a very, very unhappy Hikaru.
“Hitachiin!” Kyoya’s voice was nearly a growl, his glasses glinting in a way that signified that he was glaring at them from beyond the glass, “I’m charging you with how many customers you’re costing us...”
But no matter how Kyoya threatened...
It was just very, very hard to stop.
But, on Wednesday, there was a definite screeching pause.
-=+=-
“You were looking at Haruhi again,” Kaoru muttered, his tone nonchalant but his fingers flipping the pages to a fashion magazine callously. It had become a most unpleasant pattern, and Hikaru was positive that he hadn’t been looking at Haruhi, because he’d made sure not to.
It was Wednesday, and Hikaru hadn’t gotten a good night’s sleep in a month. Without his twin’s comfortable warmth against him, he always woke up feeling groggy, and with the tension between them, the rest of his day felt sluggish. He’d spent the last few days adamantly ignoring Haruhi’s existence-not because he was mad at her, no, but because he’d thought that maybe there was merit to what his twin was saying. But no. No, he was sure that he hadn’t been looking at her today.
His eye twitched, and an anime style symbol of pure anger appeared just over his brow. That gnawing, clenching feeling in his stomach was back tenfold, his veins itching, his muscles tensing.
“You should just go talk to him already,” Kaoru continued, not noticing the look his twin was shooting him, “instead of pretending to ignore him... it’s pathetic, reall-”
Wednesday, April 20th, in Yamauchi-sensei’s homeroom class, at exactly 7:42:12AM, Room 2-B, Kaoru Hitachiin pushed just a little too hard.
7:42:14AM-fashion magazine flying to the ground.
7:42:15AM- ignoring physical limitations, Hikaru Hitachiin pins his brother to his desk.
7:42:17AM-a deafening, deafening silence.
7:44:03AM-gasps.
7:45:22AM-screams.
-=+=-
“You... you harlots! You floozy, shameless twins! What were you thinking? You-you-” Tamaki pointed his finger wildly, his face red, eyes wide in disbelief, “and in front of Haruhi! You unethical-you devils! Mommy, tell them-” Tamaki attached himself to Kyoya, eyes watery as one hand continued pointing in the general direction of the twins.
“Actually, their little scene has already earned back what they’ve been losing us over the weeks, plus some... in fact, the bidding for their erasers just jumped by 100,000 yen, and is still rising...”
“But... demo... they’re... they’re brothers-twins! ”
“Yes, that has been their selling point for two years now...”
“De... demo! They never... did that!”
“Hey-” Kaoru, blushing like mad, glared at the King, “it wasn’t my idea-don’t blame me!”
“Aa(8), so you didn’t plan it out,” Haruhi observed, not seeming to be phased at all.
Hikaru, meanwhile, seemed to be trying to hide behind one hand. He was colored red up to his ears, periodically shaking his head as though in denial.
“Nee (9),” Hunny-sempai tugged on Haruhi’s sleeve, tilting his head adorably, “was Hika-chan really the seme (10)?”
“Seme?”
“Etto (11)...” to the horror of everyone else, except maybe Mori, Hunny continued, “was Hika-chan the one that was on top?”
“Aa...” Haruhi tapped her pointer finger on her chin, looking up at the ceiling, “yes, he did have Kaoru pinned to the desk.”
“You prostitutes! You attention whores! Look what you’ve done! You’ve tainted Haruhi with your... your vulgar-vulgar... that... your... when you... your dirty, inappropriate...”
“Kiss,” Kyoya inserted, “is the word you are looking for, I believe.”
-=+=-
They didn’t talk about it on Wednesday. In fact, Kaoru locked himself in a separate room altogether, and left for school early on Thursday. By the time that Hikaru had dragged himself to the classroom, his twin was already practically plastered to the wall, cornered by a mob of girls asking, yelling, screaming, at such a degree and frequency that the foundation of the building seemed to shake around them.
“Yabe (12)!” The older redhead muttered, dropping his bag as the girls noticed him, their eyes glinting, terrifying him with just a glance. They were worse than Kyoya.
It was a physical reaction for him, honed through catching Kaoru just a hair before he fell, or protecting him from flying objects in gym class... he lunged forward, grabbed his twin’s arm, and parted the sea of girls as though he were Moses.
Then he ran like hell, sweating in terror as the mob followed them, Kaoru basically dragged behind him as he just ran.
-=+=-
The rest of the day consisted, surprisingly, of more running. They lunged. They dashed. They sprinted. They scrambled. At one point, they even jumped from the top of the building to a lower floor balcony. They were sweaty, tired, and paranoid by third hour, hiding in the back of a spare auditorium.
“This...” Kaoru panted, “is all... your fault...”
Hikaru was trying to push his damp hair out of his face, his back pressed to the wall, trying to regain his breath, “shut... up... if you hadn’t... provoked me...”
There were footsteps outside and both of them tried to breathe as silently as possible, eyes wide in fear as shadows passed across the sliver of light under the door. By some stroke of luck, some smile of the deity above them, the doorknob did not budge.
“Provoked? ” Kaoru continued, though in a quieter hiss this time, “I didn’t do anything! You’re the one-”
“Well maybe if you... had just let the Haruhi thing go...” Hikaru glared, though he was too tired to put much venom behind it.
“Me? I only brought it up because you kept staring at her!”
“For the last/ time-I was not staring at her! ”
“Oh please! You chase her with your eyes every chance you can get!”
“Are you blind? Or just stupid?” This wasn’t the direction Hikaru wanted to go in at all. It was just that, now that they were in this line of argument, it was neigh impossible to change the topic. It annoyed him that this was the only kind of conversation they’d been having for weeks down, made the pit of his stomach squirm and flip and churn.
“I was just trying to help you out, because you seemed too dense to do anything on your own!”
“Oh, to help me act naturally? Like, I don’t know... our ‘natural separation’?”
“Maybe if you just admit to yourself that you like Haruhi-”
“What is with you? Yes, I think she’s nice. Yes, I like her, but not the way you make it seem!”
“You’ve never liked a girl like you like her!”
“Because I’ve never had a female friend, you-you-”
“I haven’t, either, but I’m not drooling over her...”
“It’s not like that! Why are you so...”
“Well, then what is it?” If it weren’t so dark in the room, Hikaru would have noticed that, without teardrops, his twin’s eyes were moist. But as it was, all he could tell was that Kaoru’s voice was shaking, and he assumed it was out of anger.
“It’s... I don’t... I don’t like her like I like you-” at that, Kaoru glared at him and the little light that crept in from under the door glinted off his eyes.
“Don’t feed me the same lines you sold to our customers!”
“I’m not! I was being honest! You wouldn’t even talk to me outside of school, so I...”
But his twin wasn’t looking at him anymore. Hikaru felt his body ache, that burning feeling running through him as he just knew his brother didn’t believe him. He’d spent all night regretting it, berating himself for being so rash as to kiss his twin, but that didn’t stop him from doing it again.
With perfect timing, a throng of girls burst through the door to see Kaoru pushed back against the wall, his brother’s hands holding his head in place as he engaged them in a different battle of the tongues altogether.
After that, they didn’t even have time to talk... By the time they’d locked the gates to their mansion, they were both utterly exhausted, hiding in the back, back, back room of their home, panting to regain their breaths. They could still hear the phantom screams of girls ringing in their ears, and the sensation remained for a few minutes.
“...”
“...”
Hikaru glanced at his twin, feeling a bit embarrassed and uncertain of himself, expecting Kaoru to start yell him again.
“...you...” his younger brother started, and just as Hikaru braced himself for verbal abuse, Kaoru burst out laughing, “...have the worst timing.”
They stared at each other for a few moments before they both dissolved into laughter.
-=+=-
They still hadn’t really talked about it. At school, they decided to keep a low profile for a few weeks, until the initial insanity died down a little. At home, they spent hours just sitting next to each other, holding hands like they always did, though their fingers were unbearably tense.
Saying that they maintained a platonic relationship before figuring things out was expecting too much of two teenagers. They would start to say something, then find theirs lips busy otherwise. After a while, they’d developed designated looks that meant they’d be making out in a matter of seconds.
Their lips knew each other, yet their hands fumbled more than they’d ever expected, clumsy and embarrassingly uncertain. More than once, Kaoru had fallen back against the bed to be met with a yelp, discovering that he’d just collapsed his entire weight on one of Hikaru’s unprepared limbs.
After so many years of ‘practice’, of smooth, flawless acting... they really should have been better adapted.
“Hikaru...” the older twin had learned, with delight, that he could make his brother release the strangest sounds, little mewls he’d never heard before. He discovered that his name could be said in many more ways than he’d thought. But this time, Kaoru’s tone told him to stop, and his wandering hands did, eyes flickering up to his other half cautiously.
“Hikaru... should... we should...”
“...talk,” he agreed, though he still wasn’t sure what that meant.
“...”
“...”
“...”
“...so... we probably shouldn’t... um... tell mom about this,” he started with the obvious.
“...yeah... probably not.”
“...”
“...”
“...did... why did you... were you ignoring me?” It tumbled past his lips, having been on his mind for all of those tense moments and sometimes, if all of his blood hadn’t rushed out of his brain, when they were touching. Hikaru still had his twin caught against the bed and felt him tense a little, but felt secure in that Kaoru could not escape.
“...”
“Nee?”
“...I was mad at you.”
“...”
“...because you like Haruhi...”
“I don’t-”
“Yes you do!”
“Not...” he took his twin’s hand, staring at the fingertips that were identical to his own, trying to clear his mind so that he could explain himself, “look... maybe... maybe if we weren’t twins, this... I really would like Haruhi like that. Maybe if I just met her and you weren’t here,” he pushed on despite the hurt look Kaoru gave him, “I’d really like her. But... but I do have you and I don’t see how anyone else... how my love for anyone else could be anything like the way I care for you.”
Hikaru wished he was better with words. It seemed that, along with his coordination, his speech was also severely impeded when it came to this new situation.
Kaoru just watched him and he felt nervous that he hadn’t gotten it across. He started to open his mouth again when his little brother just smiled, eyes lightening in a fashion he’d never imagined, much less seen, before.
And although it was a beautiful, wonderful smile, Hikaru was not above destroying it for another kiss. He knew that they were going to have a problem being discrete as he nipped at Kaoru’s bottom lip, bruising it before tilting his head enough to taste him comfortably. He was like liquid heat against his tongue, his lips, and he could taste a hint of spices, chased his brother’s teasing tongue back into his mouth.
He’d always thought that the people in movies, the actors, were just stupid. He’d never understood why they always came apart gasping for breath when they could breathe through their noses. But in a matter of minutes, he had to pull away, could feel Kaoru’s fingers trying to push him away and pull him closer in the same movement, could feel their hearts racing and their chests shuddering with need for air. He wasn’t sure when he’d closed his eyes, but he opened them as they separated, his fingers ghosting gently over flushed cheeks.
Though they didn’t dwell on it as much lately, the twins had always locked their door, even at home, before the Host Club. In that time when ‘Their World’ was all they knew and cared for, even their parents had to knock and sometimes plead to be let in.
”...did you lock the door?” Kaoru murmured breathlessly, eying the door warily as he thought he heard footprints.
“Yeah.”
It didn’t really matter how it had started. It was just very, very hard to stop.
-=+=-
Finis!
There were originally four more pages to this... wherein I tried to get them to smut, but I found this ending to be more effective. I may work the cut out parts into something else. Tell me if you’re interested ;) or just tell me what you thought. On another random note- anyone interested in one-on-one HK roleplay (not RPG)? Tell me if you are ;)
Key:
Here are some pretty basic terms... you probably knew most of them, but here they are anyways:
(1)Baka: Translates basically to ‘Idiot’ in this situation.
(2)Datte: ‘But...’ or ‘Well...’ (IE: Well, it wasn’t my idea)
(3)Uke: The term designated for ‘bottom’, usually used for same-sex relationships where gender does not decide who tops and who bottoms.
(4)Hima: ‘(I’m) bored...’
(5)Demo: ‘But...’
(6)Kyaa!: The screeching, unpleasant sound of Japanese fangirls screaming
(7)Kowai: ‘Scary...’
(8)Aa: ‘Oh.’
(9)Nee: ‘Umm...’ or something like ‘Hey...’ imposed just before a question (Ex: Hey, do you know where the cafeteria is?)
(10)Seme: The term designated for the ‘top’ in a relationship.
(11)Etto: ‘Umm...’ or “Uh...’
(12)Yabe: ‘Oh crap’, ‘Oh shit’, or the like.