What questions do Kiwis ask?
A few days ago I got a link from friend's LJ to a Russian community of childfree. Had been reading it, and well, all as everywhere, but there are interesting issues there. One of the typical complain is that parents, meaning mothers, and also other relatives, mostly female ones, poke their brains about "When are you gonna have babies?" Some people are driven mad by this, and looks like this community is pretty much the only place where they can get some sympathy. Russian society is very traditional, plus they speak there of the new government policy that encourages having babies, and 2008 is declared to be "the year of the family".
I wasn't surprised about all that, but it's quite interesting to read sometimes. However, I often thought: "How wonderful it is that there is no pressure like this in New Zealand!"
And just now I've read a thing... It's not a pressure, it's all very nice, but it was just very consistent with my thoughts in the meantime, that's probably why I reacted. (Note: I write it openly here as the original post was open to everyone, and half of you have already seen it anyway). A friend has posted in her LJ about 2 years anniversary with her boyfriend, and there was naturally a lot of squee, and then one of the ladies asked when are the babies due and when is the guy gonna make an honest woman out of his girlfriend. I didn't understand whether it was a joke or a serious question, but it made me curious. In the past years I started thinking Kiwis don't ask such questions at all, and whether or not you marry and have children is totally up to you. I have seen couples with several children and not being married, and I know at least one couple who's very married but looks like they are not gonna have children at all. So I got used to think it's totally normal in whatever option suits you best.
How is it in Kiwi culture? Do people ask you questions like this? Do they wonder when are you gonna have babies? Do they wonder for how much longer you are gonna be a "dishonest woman"? Some Russian seem to get in big conflicts with their own families and with many of their friends, because being childless they get constantly attacked by questions like "How is it that you are not planning to have children? You just don't understand what a happiness it is! You just need to try and give birth, and after that you'll see how much you will love it!"
Btw, my own personal experience makes me want for every "You just have to try it and you will see how much you will love it!" reply "Bugger off!". No matter what it is about.