(no subject)
sooooo this habit of staying up late is getting to me...i am officially feeling guilty about my new friend.....lol sigh... new i would do something that would warrant that...lol he has to get up early and ya...im keeping him up so late...i feel bad...OH! just got a web cam today...lol ya...sigh....ooo look a kitty...lol ya ya i know i know, but im to tired to care how choppy this is. going to get my hair done...kelli says that it would be a good improvement...but anything about hair, clothes or makeup is an improvement for me to kelli lol....it makes me kinda sad...im changing but do i like who im changing into...when i didnt care about how i looked or about stuff like that, i had time to just sit...just think....about all sorts of things...like how amazing a soft warm breeze is on a late spring day...sigh...how fresh and clear the air is in the country on a day like that...how perfect everything is....so calm, so peaceful...so....wonderful. no i think about how cute a shirt is....sigh...it makes me sad...i just want things to be simple again...i want at least three things to make sense in my life....lol i dont want to be a kid again but there were some perks......
then i wonder if my car can make it through a road trip....lol ya......"oooo look a kitty" i cant take a road trip....there is no way....i would need someone to go with me....and yes yes this is not just any road trip, this is one to see a boy...yes yes i know i know....its kinda scary tho...i mean not scary but...im wary...seeing this guy....i dont know.....its kinda quick....well ok...maybe im just kinda slow....HA! ok so thats not it.....lol this guy seems so cool....god please let him be what he seems....oh please lord.....lol im only half joking.....i really was praying...lol i can just see it being sooooo great till something happens.......sigh......i guess what im trying to say(and failing miserably) is that its so great talking to this guy, it so,...almost perfect.....and anytime anything ever starts that way...it makes me wary... tho i believe that i have good reason(smiles) "mr i believe in communication"my ass.......humf lol well he screwed me over....kind like chris...but oh well....im not bitter *cousunofabitchgh* sigh....lol im always so wary anymore...so hesitant...what happened to the hey what the heck sure i'll do it, i'll try it....hmmmmm oh ya thats right im sick of failing and falling....till i hit face first with no cushion. gee how could i forget
OWWWWWWWWW I just banged my knee on the stupid desk..........dang it that hurt!.....ow....lol
im wasting my time....sigh what a great song....thanks to kool people who have kool websites, who play kool music, who are kool enough to know how/put up kool music on their kool websites cuz they're kool.........lol
oh...where is my staind cd when i want it....."cuz its always raining in my head" as the rain keeps pouring down, down on my window down on my life, if only it could soak me, fill me let it take me as i drift away down deep and peace finally comes and quiet is all around and sleep finds a home...thats when i'll be whole again...........ya....feeling a bit poetic tonight...it is raining tho...and i love the rain, there is nothing more peaceful...or beautiful and mysterious at the same time....so melancholy, but i love it....(soft gentle smile) thinks of a friend...(giggles)(slight blush)(smiles) yeps im a dork...lol anyway...its late, im tired....sleep is good..
then i wonder if my car can make it through a road trip....lol ya......"oooo look a kitty" i cant take a road trip....there is no way....i would need someone to go with me....and yes yes this is not just any road trip, this is one to see a boy...yes yes i know i know....its kinda scary tho...i mean not scary but...im wary...seeing this guy....i dont know.....its kinda quick....well ok...maybe im just kinda slow....HA! ok so thats not it.....lol this guy seems so cool....god please let him be what he seems....oh please lord.....lol im only half joking.....i really was praying...lol i can just see it being sooooo great till something happens.......sigh......i guess what im trying to say(and failing miserably) is that its so great talking to this guy, it so,...almost perfect.....and anytime anything ever starts that way...it makes me wary... tho i believe that i have good reason(smiles) "mr i believe in communication"my ass.......humf lol well he screwed me over....kind like chris...but oh well....im not bitter *cousunofabitchgh* sigh....lol im always so wary anymore...so hesitant...what happened to the hey what the heck sure i'll do it, i'll try it....hmmmmm oh ya thats right im sick of failing and falling....till i hit face first with no cushion. gee how could i forget
OWWWWWWWWW I just banged my knee on the stupid desk..........dang it that hurt!.....ow....lol
im wasting my time....sigh what a great song....thanks to kool people who have kool websites, who play kool music, who are kool enough to know how/put up kool music on their kool websites cuz they're kool.........lol
oh...where is my staind cd when i want it....."cuz its always raining in my head" as the rain keeps pouring down, down on my window down on my life, if only it could soak me, fill me let it take me as i drift away down deep and peace finally comes and quiet is all around and sleep finds a home...thats when i'll be whole again...........ya....feeling a bit poetic tonight...it is raining tho...and i love the rain, there is nothing more peaceful...or beautiful and mysterious at the same time....so melancholy, but i love it....(soft gentle smile) thinks of a friend...(giggles)(slight blush)(smiles) yeps im a dork...lol anyway...its late, im tired....sleep is good..