unfriendly friends
so another friend who is friends with my former so-called "friends" didn't want to be friends anymore too because she wanted to be friends with those who I weren't friends anymore with... well, if they did consider me a friend at all. I actually never felt like I was a friend, so whatever.
I respect this person because at least she had the guts to tell me that I was being selfish and shit. Yeah, I am selfish. everyone is. It's sad that she didn't want to be friends anymore because I never had an issue with her. Apparently, I insulted someone and I'm the wickedest wicked witch of the wonderland. Think what they want, I don't even remember what I ate last night. Nobody told me I was being a turd until now, which took me by surprise and chuckles.
I don't exactly know why I'm being pestered about it now more than ever, maybe because some shithead told other shitheads some crap about me, but hey... I have haters now. I'm fucking famous. I don't even have any spite towards these people. They've merely transformed their social relationship with me as being an acquaintance instead of a friend, which in my opinion, was what it was for the past 800 years. I felt like an acquaintance to them since forever.
She also mentioned that I should look at my current relationships now and maybe realize something. Yup, I've realized that I have real friends who would take a bullet for me if the situation arises. It just so happens that they live far away. The thing is, I don't like being civil about being liked or hated. I don't like hanging out with people who don't like me anyway, I just tried to be friends, but it didn't work out. That's it. If I've insulted anyone, I've never mentioned names so it's either your conscience or it's your paranoia, but it's definitely your fault for reading my fucking journal. THIS IS WHAT I FEEL.
I was also asked why I haven't been the one asking about why I'm being treated like turd. The thing is, as much as I hate confrontations, I don't like being the one to grovel and ask about why I'm being treated like shit. If I get treated like shit, then I go away. Simple. If they'd been the ones who asked why I'm being a bitch, I might have answered properly. But it's over now, and it doesn't matter what they say or think anymore because I'm done. I've been treated like shit too many times, and it's not just me who have noticed. In fact, I was asked by friends a couple of years ago why I'm friends with these people... and I couldn't answer. That's how bad it was since before.
Maybe I've been insulting and fuck faced recently, but that's just so I can do this. I'm not brave enough before, but it's not worth it anymore (shit, that sounds like a good song there). Unlike them, I can't act like nothing's happened when in fact I loathe every moment spent with someone. I just can't be in the same room with someone I don't like.
I respect this person because at least she had the guts to tell me that I was being selfish and shit. Yeah, I am selfish. everyone is. It's sad that she didn't want to be friends anymore because I never had an issue with her. Apparently, I insulted someone and I'm the wickedest wicked witch of the wonderland. Think what they want, I don't even remember what I ate last night. Nobody told me I was being a turd until now, which took me by surprise and chuckles.
I don't exactly know why I'm being pestered about it now more than ever, maybe because some shithead told other shitheads some crap about me, but hey... I have haters now. I'm fucking famous. I don't even have any spite towards these people. They've merely transformed their social relationship with me as being an acquaintance instead of a friend, which in my opinion, was what it was for the past 800 years. I felt like an acquaintance to them since forever.
She also mentioned that I should look at my current relationships now and maybe realize something. Yup, I've realized that I have real friends who would take a bullet for me if the situation arises. It just so happens that they live far away. The thing is, I don't like being civil about being liked or hated. I don't like hanging out with people who don't like me anyway, I just tried to be friends, but it didn't work out. That's it. If I've insulted anyone, I've never mentioned names so it's either your conscience or it's your paranoia, but it's definitely your fault for reading my fucking journal. THIS IS WHAT I FEEL.
I was also asked why I haven't been the one asking about why I'm being treated like turd. The thing is, as much as I hate confrontations, I don't like being the one to grovel and ask about why I'm being treated like shit. If I get treated like shit, then I go away. Simple. If they'd been the ones who asked why I'm being a bitch, I might have answered properly. But it's over now, and it doesn't matter what they say or think anymore because I'm done. I've been treated like shit too many times, and it's not just me who have noticed. In fact, I was asked by friends a couple of years ago why I'm friends with these people... and I couldn't answer. That's how bad it was since before.
Maybe I've been insulting and fuck faced recently, but that's just so I can do this. I'm not brave enough before, but it's not worth it anymore (shit, that sounds like a good song there). Unlike them, I can't act like nothing's happened when in fact I loathe every moment spent with someone. I just can't be in the same room with someone I don't like.