A rant never read...le sigh
AAAGGGHHH! i hate my life right now. i mainly hang out with this girl laura, and i really just do not like her. her and that group of people hang out in her room, which is right next to mine. i'll go to hang in there, but nothing is happening, which is fine. but i'll sorta be laying down, and you know, dozing off, and she keeps screaming at me not to go to sleep and will hit/jab me to keep me awake. now, it's not like i say "hey everybody, i'm trying to take a nap, so could you please keep it down?" if you know me you know i'm always good if you talk to me, even shake me awake to tell me stuff, or start talking to me, whatever. but if you are sitting there, doing nothing, leave me the hell alone. don't wake me up to tell me not to sleep. she does this everywhere. like, it pisses her off if i fall asleep in-transit to somewhere, like on the plane or bus, and she will continuosly wake me up and bitch at me like the fact that i can sleep makes me less of a person than her. AND because i can do this, if i ever complain about being tired, she's like, don't talk to me about being tired, you get sleep all the time, and she's seriously all accusatory and hostile about it. and it's like, hmmm...if i were well rested would i be able to go to sleep at the drop of a hat? i think not! and, am i even saying i'm MORE tired than you? no! seriously, i hate people that can't just listen to you complain and not turn it into some type of retarded competition. and it's not like i complain all the time or something. besides, if you can't say in a whiney voice to your 'friends' on the way to an 8:30 class, "I'mm soooooo tiiiired!" then what the fuck? they are not your friends. well, they're not my friends anyway.
new requirement for my friends:
1)if we live together (ie dorm situation or whatever) you need to be chill with me sleeping if you're not in the middle of pouring out your soul to me. DAMN IT! this seriously annoys the shit out of me still. i am so lax! like, even when i'm asleep in my room or whatever i've told everyone that they can wake me up to ask me if i want to do something, or like if they have a question, or whatever. like, i don't mind being woken up ever, if it's for some purpose. that's how i am, if something is going on, i want to be up for it, please wake me up. I can stay up for three days straight if there's a combination of fun stuff to do and work that has to be done, but if nothing is going on, then what better time could there be to sleep? and why all the hostility? what about seeing me asleep for like 20 min on a bus makes her seeth with annoyance?
--anyway, here's why i love my real friends back in the states, there was this party in this girl's room, and they were like, you have to come you have to come, even though i was really tired. and so i went, even though i was seriously tired because it was during or right after midterms. so i lied down on the bottom bunk, and yeah, was out in like 2 minutes, and there was a million people in and out of the room, big party or whatever, and i slept through the whole thing, and they just took pictures of me because i'd undone my belt to be more comfortable sleeping and my arm was out to the side so they said i looked like a crack whore, and the whole thing was just funny. i yeah, actually love that, sleeping in the presense of friends, i don't know, i'm weird, but it just makes me feel good/safe.
2) do NOT try to compete with me for who has the shittier life. i'm not saying i win, cause i probably don't. i don't have that bad of a life. but guess what, we all need to bitch sometimes, and that's what you do with your friends. some people do it to anyone they meet. namely, me (as in people seem to think i want to hear them bitch) but even I can listen to nondiscript bitching if it doesn't go on too long. like, any "i'm tired, i don't wanna take this test, i hate that teacher, this food sucks" type comments, bring them on. it is not that difficult to be like "yeah, you're right" or "yeah, i'm tired to" or whatever. what do people have to prove who's response to "i feel sick" is "whatever, don't talk to ME about sick. there's no way you feel as bad as i do!" ...like they invented being sick. like, me not feeling well, and having the audacity to voice it is somehow attacking their fucking kingdom of having the shittiest life in the whole world. christ.
okay, i think that's it for rules and rantings, i'm sure most of you didn't read this post anyway, but i'm just in a venting mood.
new requirement for my friends:
1)if we live together (ie dorm situation or whatever) you need to be chill with me sleeping if you're not in the middle of pouring out your soul to me. DAMN IT! this seriously annoys the shit out of me still. i am so lax! like, even when i'm asleep in my room or whatever i've told everyone that they can wake me up to ask me if i want to do something, or like if they have a question, or whatever. like, i don't mind being woken up ever, if it's for some purpose. that's how i am, if something is going on, i want to be up for it, please wake me up. I can stay up for three days straight if there's a combination of fun stuff to do and work that has to be done, but if nothing is going on, then what better time could there be to sleep? and why all the hostility? what about seeing me asleep for like 20 min on a bus makes her seeth with annoyance?
--anyway, here's why i love my real friends back in the states, there was this party in this girl's room, and they were like, you have to come you have to come, even though i was really tired. and so i went, even though i was seriously tired because it was during or right after midterms. so i lied down on the bottom bunk, and yeah, was out in like 2 minutes, and there was a million people in and out of the room, big party or whatever, and i slept through the whole thing, and they just took pictures of me because i'd undone my belt to be more comfortable sleeping and my arm was out to the side so they said i looked like a crack whore, and the whole thing was just funny. i yeah, actually love that, sleeping in the presense of friends, i don't know, i'm weird, but it just makes me feel good/safe.
2) do NOT try to compete with me for who has the shittier life. i'm not saying i win, cause i probably don't. i don't have that bad of a life. but guess what, we all need to bitch sometimes, and that's what you do with your friends. some people do it to anyone they meet. namely, me (as in people seem to think i want to hear them bitch) but even I can listen to nondiscript bitching if it doesn't go on too long. like, any "i'm tired, i don't wanna take this test, i hate that teacher, this food sucks" type comments, bring them on. it is not that difficult to be like "yeah, you're right" or "yeah, i'm tired to" or whatever. what do people have to prove who's response to "i feel sick" is "whatever, don't talk to ME about sick. there's no way you feel as bad as i do!" ...like they invented being sick. like, me not feeling well, and having the audacity to voice it is somehow attacking their fucking kingdom of having the shittiest life in the whole world. christ.
okay, i think that's it for rules and rantings, i'm sure most of you didn't read this post anyway, but i'm just in a venting mood.