Fic: Gonna Have to Be (Glee, Puck/Kurt)
Title: Gonna Have to Be
Rating: PG
Pairing: Puck/Kurt, Puck/Blaine if you wanna read it that way, though that’s not intended.
Words: 2300
Summary: Kurt isn't at Sectionals because he's in the hospital.
Warnings: Potential spoilers for Unaired episode, Serious Hurt/Comfort, almost Tragedy.
A/N: This is my first Gleefic, and the frst Angst I’ve written in a damn long time (like 3+ years) So please bear with me. This is also unbeta’d. For anyone who’s heard the spoilers for "Original SOng", this is kind of a response.s my interpretation of what could happen.
Song: "Brave" by Idina Menzel
The auditorium was filled with the chatter of the ignorant audience. They had no idea, they didn’t understand the magnitude of the tragedy that had occurred just days before. Rachel turned from peeking out the curtain to Puck. “Are you alright?” she offered to the football player who was absently strumming his guitar. She placed a manicured hand on his shoulder; he turned to look at her but remained silent. She could practically see him thinking through his response. He’s not here. He should be. I miss him. Help me.
“I’m gonna have to be.” He offered plainly. They were his words, but they all felt it. They could tell there was something missing; the last puzzle piece to make the picture whole again. But that one piece had single-handedly been annihilated by a drunk driver on an otherwise ordinary night. She was surprised Puck had even shown up. He hadn’t been in school since the accident, and Lauren had explained to them that he spent most of his time drunk for those days. Finn had said he’d been at the hospital nearly the whole time. When he ambled up to the bus, fifteen minutes before they planned to leave, everyone had been shocked. He looked exhausted, dark circles under his eyes visible even though he was watching his feet.
In the end, the song had been his idea. The bus ride was long, quiet and torturous, everyone knowing that their hearts weren’t in it. Rachel herself had even contemplated telling Puck off when he began strumming his guitar, slow and melancholy. She could hear that the song was missing passion, because it sounded a little off, regardless if it was written for guitar or not. After a moment she noted that he was playing off-tempo, too slow, but she recognized the song regardless. He seemed to give up after the opening instrumental, and the silence was even heavier after the last string had ceased to vibrate. Artie was the first to sing. The pouring rain, a cliché that Rachel almost laughed at, was drown out as Mercedes Joined in. Not all of them knew the song, but there were enough of them to do it justice. Mr. Schue was smiling from his seat at the front, watching them all like a proud father. It really wasn’t the time for smiling. After the bus had been evacuated, Puck had hung back and talked to Mr. Schue.
After pulling some strings, he’d gotten the judges to allow them an extra unjudged song.“Five minutes until show start!” was called across the dressing area. Rachel noticed Puck sitting on a beaten loveseat, crammed in with Finn and Blaine. Finn had taken it hard too. At first, he’d attempted to back to school, but as it turned out had to be sent home after first period. She wasn’t there, but rumor had it he’d been acting out big time; getting in fights and yelling at teachers. He’d sat in the seat behind Puck on the bus, since Puck decided to take up the whole bench; though Puck didn’t talk, he was there, and Puck was there for him. Blaine, on the other hand, was about as bad off as Puck was.
Blaine hadn’t seemed any different in general. He and Rachel were very similar after all. They were performers and they knew that the show must go on. The only clue he’d given to how he was feeling was when he was waiting for New Directions to arrive in the hotel lobby. He’d stood from the chair quickly, and had given each of them a hug in return. She’d watched the exchange between Blaine and Puck. It had to have been the manliest hug she’d ever seen. When Blaine and Finn hugged, Finn barely held onto the smaller male, but Puck had squeezed him tight, burying his face in Blaine’s uniformed shoulder. When they separated, Blaine laughed. “You smell like booze.” He offered, and Puck offered a small smile. Rachel had counted it as progress.
Mr. Schue had ushered them to the side of the stage, and Puck, at Rachel’s side, was getting increasingly fidgety. “It’ll be fine.” Rachel reminded him. He sighed.
“I’m not worried about the performance.” She glanced at him and couldn’t help but ask what he was worried about, but as she opened her mouth to speak, they were ushered onstage.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, two of the show choirs in performance today have requested to perform a special song. This performance will not be factored into the judging of the competition. Without further ado, I present selected members of New Directions and the Dalton Academy Warblers.” Spoke the head Judge as Blaine led Puck, Rachel, Finn, and Mercedes out on stage, each carrying a stool, Puck with his guitar, and Finn with a second stool. They set their stools up in a semicircle around the standing mic and Finn reached forward, glancing around nervously. He spared a specific look at Puck, who’d begun to find his feet especially interesting.
“Hi, Ladies and Gentlemen. Uh, my name is Finn Hudson-Hummel…” he nodded to Mr. Schue in the front where he was holding up Rachel’s flip camera.
“Hey.” Burt stood from where he sat when he saw Carole and some of the kids approaching. “How’d it go?”
“We asked Mom to take us back early.” Finn said, hugging his stepfather.
“We thought that there was no point in being there for the results. If we won, it wouldn’t really be a win.” Rachel nodded solemnly, “It would be kind of disrespectful to Kurt to worry about if we won rather than if he was okay.”
“Blaine too?” Burt offered, nodding his head to the uniformed teen.
“’Course, Mr. Hummel. I care about him just as much as everyone else.” Blaine offered a smile, but was watching Puck where the football player was propped against the door jamb, arms crossed with his back to the group in the hall, watching Kurt.
“Noah.” Burt sighed, but not quite loud enough for the mohawked teen to hear. He likely wouldn’t have anyway; he seemed to be stuck in his own head for the time being.
“Has there been any change?” Mercedes spoke up. Burt offered a slight smile, “He woke up a few hours ago, but he’s unconscious again.”
“That’s great!” Rachel noted, “It means he’s getting better, right?” She put a hand on the man’s shoulder, he shook his head,
“When he woke up, I told him you had all gone to the competition. Being him, he tried to get up and fell, hit his head.” He offered, seating himself again. “It’s my entire fault. I shouldn’t have told him.” He rubbed his forehead.
“Oh, honey.” Carole sat down next to her husband and rubbed his back. “It’s not your fault. Not at all.”
“The doctor said it could have made the swelling in his brain worse.” Burt choked, then sobbed. Everyone had fallen silent. Puck his disappeared into Kurt’s room. The sound of Burt crying in the hall filled a blank silence, and Mercedes moved across the hall into the room as well, followed by the rest of the teens.
It was strange, Rachel thought, to see Puck hunched over in that probably uncomfortable plastic chair, the way she has seen Kurt not too long ago, only it was Kurt in the bed this time, and his father was the one devastated and scared. Puck had taken hold of Kurt’s limp hand, well manicured courtesy of Mercedes, and kept whispering apologies, about how this is all his fault. Everyone knew Puck thought this was all his fault, even though Kurt had been the one driving and the uninjured, drunk frat boy had been the one to speed through a red signal at thirty over. But Puck insisted he had been the one to practically beg Kurt to come over at one in the morning. Rachel could only assume that he felt doubly guilty for going to Sectionals rather than stay in the hospital. There was no telling what would happen when and… if Kurt woke. Finn had explained enough to Rachel for her to know just how insecure Puck could be about some things, just like he was convinced he was the reason Mr. Puckerman left and his little sister didn’t have a dad. She suspects that that’s the reason the Puck leaves school early and skips football or Glee practice, because he’s trying to make up to his little sister for her loss.
Blaine sat down next to the bed, on the opposite side of Puck and talked to Kurt as if he was wide awake and listening intently. “Kurt, you should have been there, The Warblers were nothing without your solo, but New Directions would have blown us out of the water anyway. They wrote original songs. I mean, how could we even try to compete with that?” He chuckled, sparing a half-smile for Puck, who was watching him silently.
“You missed your solo.” Rachel spoke sadly. “You wanted it so bad. Remember when you came to me to ask for advice for your audition? Turned out I kind of screwed you over.” She offered a slight laugh. “I mean, it wasn’t intentional, but you remember when I asked you if you ever thought about your own funeral?”
“Rachel!” Finn barked, Puck glared, “I don’t think that’s something that really needs to be mentioned right now…” The taller football player hissed, watching Puck carefully.
“I have a point, Finn.” Rachel explained. “Kurt, I know it’s not your funeral or anything, but the Judges let us sing a song for you.” She said.
“And we did a damn good job, too.” Mercedes laughed, “Too bad they couldn’t judge us on it.”
“Mr. Schuester recorded it so we could show you if you wake up.” Rachel continued as if she hadn’t been interrupted.
“When you wake up.” Blaine noted, a smile still ghosting his cheeks.
“I think we should play it now.” Finn piped up after a short silence, “I mean, just because he’s not responding doesn’t mean he’s not listening, right?”
“I agree.” Mercedes confirmed. “I’ll go get Mr. Hummel.” She nodded before leaving the room. Crowding all seven of them into the room around the bed was no small feat, but they managed somewhat comfortably. Blaine, who was now holding the camera under the TV pushed the play button.
“Hi, Ladies and Gentlemen. Uh, my name is Finn Hudson-Hummel. Just a few days ago, my brother was in a car accident with a drunk driver.” Finn paused, looked at his feet.
“He was supposed to be here tonight,” Blaine spoke up, “Performing with the Warblers. But because he can’t be, the five of us wanted to make him a video. Kurt, you’re my best friend, and I’m sure Mercedes and Rachel would say the same. And we are so lucky to have you as our friend.”
“Yeah, I mean, you’re the best brother I could ask for. You’ve dealt with a lot more than any of us have. So, I guess this song says it all.” Finn continued, smiling at Blaine. The two sat down next to their companions, leaving one empty stool, cliché and symbolic. Puck, watching his own hands began to strum before Blaine started the first verse.
“I don’t know just where I’m going and tomorrow is a little overwhelming, and the air is cold, but I’m not the same anymore…”
Carole sniffed and Burt hugged her close as Finn watched her sympathetically. Rachel was in awe of how easily they’d fallen into being a family, Carole worried for Kurt just as much as she would be worried for Finn. Puck was laying his head on his folded arms on the side of the bed, his eyes closed and breathing even. He was finally getting some well-deserved rest that Rachel suspected had been three days coming.
When Rachel looked back at the screen, the first chorus, sung by Mercedes, had already been finished and Puck was beginning the second voice
“All along, all I ever wanted, was to be the light when your life was daunting.” That much was true. Rachel had known how much Puck cared for Kurt the moment Kurt transferred. Santana had claimed to have known all along, but Rachel was suspicious of that. Halfway through the verse, Puck had given up and Rachel took over,
“Well who's to blame, are we making the right choices? Cause we can't be sure if we're hearing our own voices.” She could remember what she was thinking as she sang. She had been so awful to Kurt, once upon a time. Hell, she’d been so awful to everyone at some point or another. She likes to think she’s better now.
Finn sang the bridge before they all chimed in for the final chorus. They really sounded good together, harmonizing despite how impromptu the song had been. “I can't be afraid, Cause it's my turn to be brave.” That was the point of the song. They had to be brave for-
“Is he asleep?” Rachel turned in shock. Kurt was awake. Everyone was smiling at him, beaming really. His voice is so frail, but she could hear the amusement in the question. Rachel laughed slightly, realizing that the first thing Kurt’s worried about is his sleeping boyfriend.
“Yeah he is, he hasn’t really slept since the accident.” Burt piped up, beaming at his son.
“I’ll wake him.” Mercedes offered, reaching forward to rouse the football player.
“No, he’s okay.” Kurt offered. He didn’t look great. He was barely moving, kind of half-out of it, blinking a lot. He lifted his hand and put it on Puck’s arm. “So, who won?”
Everyone laughed.
Rating: PG
Pairing: Puck/Kurt, Puck/Blaine if you wanna read it that way, though that’s not intended.
Words: 2300
Summary: Kurt isn't at Sectionals because he's in the hospital.
Warnings: Potential spoilers for Unaired episode, Serious Hurt/Comfort, almost Tragedy.
A/N: This is my first Gleefic, and the frst Angst I’ve written in a damn long time (like 3+ years) So please bear with me. This is also unbeta’d. For anyone who’s heard the spoilers for "Original SOng", this is kind of a response.s my interpretation of what could happen.
Song: "Brave" by Idina Menzel
The auditorium was filled with the chatter of the ignorant audience. They had no idea, they didn’t understand the magnitude of the tragedy that had occurred just days before. Rachel turned from peeking out the curtain to Puck. “Are you alright?” she offered to the football player who was absently strumming his guitar. She placed a manicured hand on his shoulder; he turned to look at her but remained silent. She could practically see him thinking through his response. He’s not here. He should be. I miss him. Help me.
“I’m gonna have to be.” He offered plainly. They were his words, but they all felt it. They could tell there was something missing; the last puzzle piece to make the picture whole again. But that one piece had single-handedly been annihilated by a drunk driver on an otherwise ordinary night. She was surprised Puck had even shown up. He hadn’t been in school since the accident, and Lauren had explained to them that he spent most of his time drunk for those days. Finn had said he’d been at the hospital nearly the whole time. When he ambled up to the bus, fifteen minutes before they planned to leave, everyone had been shocked. He looked exhausted, dark circles under his eyes visible even though he was watching his feet.
In the end, the song had been his idea. The bus ride was long, quiet and torturous, everyone knowing that their hearts weren’t in it. Rachel herself had even contemplated telling Puck off when he began strumming his guitar, slow and melancholy. She could hear that the song was missing passion, because it sounded a little off, regardless if it was written for guitar or not. After a moment she noted that he was playing off-tempo, too slow, but she recognized the song regardless. He seemed to give up after the opening instrumental, and the silence was even heavier after the last string had ceased to vibrate. Artie was the first to sing. The pouring rain, a cliché that Rachel almost laughed at, was drown out as Mercedes Joined in. Not all of them knew the song, but there were enough of them to do it justice. Mr. Schue was smiling from his seat at the front, watching them all like a proud father. It really wasn’t the time for smiling. After the bus had been evacuated, Puck had hung back and talked to Mr. Schue.
After pulling some strings, he’d gotten the judges to allow them an extra unjudged song.“Five minutes until show start!” was called across the dressing area. Rachel noticed Puck sitting on a beaten loveseat, crammed in with Finn and Blaine. Finn had taken it hard too. At first, he’d attempted to back to school, but as it turned out had to be sent home after first period. She wasn’t there, but rumor had it he’d been acting out big time; getting in fights and yelling at teachers. He’d sat in the seat behind Puck on the bus, since Puck decided to take up the whole bench; though Puck didn’t talk, he was there, and Puck was there for him. Blaine, on the other hand, was about as bad off as Puck was.
Blaine hadn’t seemed any different in general. He and Rachel were very similar after all. They were performers and they knew that the show must go on. The only clue he’d given to how he was feeling was when he was waiting for New Directions to arrive in the hotel lobby. He’d stood from the chair quickly, and had given each of them a hug in return. She’d watched the exchange between Blaine and Puck. It had to have been the manliest hug she’d ever seen. When Blaine and Finn hugged, Finn barely held onto the smaller male, but Puck had squeezed him tight, burying his face in Blaine’s uniformed shoulder. When they separated, Blaine laughed. “You smell like booze.” He offered, and Puck offered a small smile. Rachel had counted it as progress.
Mr. Schue had ushered them to the side of the stage, and Puck, at Rachel’s side, was getting increasingly fidgety. “It’ll be fine.” Rachel reminded him. He sighed.
“I’m not worried about the performance.” She glanced at him and couldn’t help but ask what he was worried about, but as she opened her mouth to speak, they were ushered onstage.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, two of the show choirs in performance today have requested to perform a special song. This performance will not be factored into the judging of the competition. Without further ado, I present selected members of New Directions and the Dalton Academy Warblers.” Spoke the head Judge as Blaine led Puck, Rachel, Finn, and Mercedes out on stage, each carrying a stool, Puck with his guitar, and Finn with a second stool. They set their stools up in a semicircle around the standing mic and Finn reached forward, glancing around nervously. He spared a specific look at Puck, who’d begun to find his feet especially interesting.
“Hi, Ladies and Gentlemen. Uh, my name is Finn Hudson-Hummel…” he nodded to Mr. Schue in the front where he was holding up Rachel’s flip camera.
“Hey.” Burt stood from where he sat when he saw Carole and some of the kids approaching. “How’d it go?”
“We asked Mom to take us back early.” Finn said, hugging his stepfather.
“We thought that there was no point in being there for the results. If we won, it wouldn’t really be a win.” Rachel nodded solemnly, “It would be kind of disrespectful to Kurt to worry about if we won rather than if he was okay.”
“Blaine too?” Burt offered, nodding his head to the uniformed teen.
“’Course, Mr. Hummel. I care about him just as much as everyone else.” Blaine offered a smile, but was watching Puck where the football player was propped against the door jamb, arms crossed with his back to the group in the hall, watching Kurt.
“Noah.” Burt sighed, but not quite loud enough for the mohawked teen to hear. He likely wouldn’t have anyway; he seemed to be stuck in his own head for the time being.
“Has there been any change?” Mercedes spoke up. Burt offered a slight smile, “He woke up a few hours ago, but he’s unconscious again.”
“That’s great!” Rachel noted, “It means he’s getting better, right?” She put a hand on the man’s shoulder, he shook his head,
“When he woke up, I told him you had all gone to the competition. Being him, he tried to get up and fell, hit his head.” He offered, seating himself again. “It’s my entire fault. I shouldn’t have told him.” He rubbed his forehead.
“Oh, honey.” Carole sat down next to her husband and rubbed his back. “It’s not your fault. Not at all.”
“The doctor said it could have made the swelling in his brain worse.” Burt choked, then sobbed. Everyone had fallen silent. Puck his disappeared into Kurt’s room. The sound of Burt crying in the hall filled a blank silence, and Mercedes moved across the hall into the room as well, followed by the rest of the teens.
It was strange, Rachel thought, to see Puck hunched over in that probably uncomfortable plastic chair, the way she has seen Kurt not too long ago, only it was Kurt in the bed this time, and his father was the one devastated and scared. Puck had taken hold of Kurt’s limp hand, well manicured courtesy of Mercedes, and kept whispering apologies, about how this is all his fault. Everyone knew Puck thought this was all his fault, even though Kurt had been the one driving and the uninjured, drunk frat boy had been the one to speed through a red signal at thirty over. But Puck insisted he had been the one to practically beg Kurt to come over at one in the morning. Rachel could only assume that he felt doubly guilty for going to Sectionals rather than stay in the hospital. There was no telling what would happen when and… if Kurt woke. Finn had explained enough to Rachel for her to know just how insecure Puck could be about some things, just like he was convinced he was the reason Mr. Puckerman left and his little sister didn’t have a dad. She suspects that that’s the reason the Puck leaves school early and skips football or Glee practice, because he’s trying to make up to his little sister for her loss.
Blaine sat down next to the bed, on the opposite side of Puck and talked to Kurt as if he was wide awake and listening intently. “Kurt, you should have been there, The Warblers were nothing without your solo, but New Directions would have blown us out of the water anyway. They wrote original songs. I mean, how could we even try to compete with that?” He chuckled, sparing a half-smile for Puck, who was watching him silently.
“You missed your solo.” Rachel spoke sadly. “You wanted it so bad. Remember when you came to me to ask for advice for your audition? Turned out I kind of screwed you over.” She offered a slight laugh. “I mean, it wasn’t intentional, but you remember when I asked you if you ever thought about your own funeral?”
“Rachel!” Finn barked, Puck glared, “I don’t think that’s something that really needs to be mentioned right now…” The taller football player hissed, watching Puck carefully.
“I have a point, Finn.” Rachel explained. “Kurt, I know it’s not your funeral or anything, but the Judges let us sing a song for you.” She said.
“And we did a damn good job, too.” Mercedes laughed, “Too bad they couldn’t judge us on it.”
“Mr. Schuester recorded it so we could show you if you wake up.” Rachel continued as if she hadn’t been interrupted.
“When you wake up.” Blaine noted, a smile still ghosting his cheeks.
“I think we should play it now.” Finn piped up after a short silence, “I mean, just because he’s not responding doesn’t mean he’s not listening, right?”
“I agree.” Mercedes confirmed. “I’ll go get Mr. Hummel.” She nodded before leaving the room. Crowding all seven of them into the room around the bed was no small feat, but they managed somewhat comfortably. Blaine, who was now holding the camera under the TV pushed the play button.
“Hi, Ladies and Gentlemen. Uh, my name is Finn Hudson-Hummel. Just a few days ago, my brother was in a car accident with a drunk driver.” Finn paused, looked at his feet.
“He was supposed to be here tonight,” Blaine spoke up, “Performing with the Warblers. But because he can’t be, the five of us wanted to make him a video. Kurt, you’re my best friend, and I’m sure Mercedes and Rachel would say the same. And we are so lucky to have you as our friend.”
“Yeah, I mean, you’re the best brother I could ask for. You’ve dealt with a lot more than any of us have. So, I guess this song says it all.” Finn continued, smiling at Blaine. The two sat down next to their companions, leaving one empty stool, cliché and symbolic. Puck, watching his own hands began to strum before Blaine started the first verse.
“I don’t know just where I’m going and tomorrow is a little overwhelming, and the air is cold, but I’m not the same anymore…”
Carole sniffed and Burt hugged her close as Finn watched her sympathetically. Rachel was in awe of how easily they’d fallen into being a family, Carole worried for Kurt just as much as she would be worried for Finn. Puck was laying his head on his folded arms on the side of the bed, his eyes closed and breathing even. He was finally getting some well-deserved rest that Rachel suspected had been three days coming.
When Rachel looked back at the screen, the first chorus, sung by Mercedes, had already been finished and Puck was beginning the second voice
“All along, all I ever wanted, was to be the light when your life was daunting.” That much was true. Rachel had known how much Puck cared for Kurt the moment Kurt transferred. Santana had claimed to have known all along, but Rachel was suspicious of that. Halfway through the verse, Puck had given up and Rachel took over,
“Well who's to blame, are we making the right choices? Cause we can't be sure if we're hearing our own voices.” She could remember what she was thinking as she sang. She had been so awful to Kurt, once upon a time. Hell, she’d been so awful to everyone at some point or another. She likes to think she’s better now.
Finn sang the bridge before they all chimed in for the final chorus. They really sounded good together, harmonizing despite how impromptu the song had been. “I can't be afraid, Cause it's my turn to be brave.” That was the point of the song. They had to be brave for-
“Is he asleep?” Rachel turned in shock. Kurt was awake. Everyone was smiling at him, beaming really. His voice is so frail, but she could hear the amusement in the question. Rachel laughed slightly, realizing that the first thing Kurt’s worried about is his sleeping boyfriend.
“Yeah he is, he hasn’t really slept since the accident.” Burt piped up, beaming at his son.
“I’ll wake him.” Mercedes offered, reaching forward to rouse the football player.
“No, he’s okay.” Kurt offered. He didn’t look great. He was barely moving, kind of half-out of it, blinking a lot. He lifted his hand and put it on Puck’s arm. “So, who won?”
Everyone laughed.