Use of Surrogate Sex Partners Rising Among Women

[superfan1]

Sex therapists talk with their patients to help them confront their sexual problems and improve their sex lives. But some patients need more than talk therapy. They need practice in the bedroom, and have no spouse or partner to turn to.

Comments

[lickety_split]

Where the fuck do I even begin?

[lickety_split]

I guess my main beef with this is who qualifies someone to be a paid fuck buddy surrogate sex partner? What's the training? The certification? Is there a board you can complain to? How does anyone know they're good at fucking anyway? Do they fuck the therapist first as proof? Eat her out? Suck his dick? How do they prove they're the Sexual Spartan they're supposed to be to these vulnerable people? I mean, clearly this isn't regulated so who makes sure that these men aren't passing on diseases to their clients?

I dunno it just sounds... predatory, somehow.

If the patient becomes attached, "That is great, it's awesome because the client never allowed herself to open her heart and fall in love with someone before," Rotem said.Mmmm, no. And I'd think that as someone engaging in this would recommend the patient see a new surrogate if this happened, just like any other professional whose client has developed romantic feelings for them. I mean clearly, this man doesn't have one fucking clue how damaging this could be to a

[tin_foil_hat]

I think regulation is important (by the correct bodies), you don't want Mr. Sleaze claiming to be a sexual surrogate just to get laid. I presume testing would be regulated similar to sex work. Over here you have to have an STI test every two months.

I suspect (or strongly hope) that that is a hippy way of gently saying "it's ok that you feel open and attached, it's really positive you can feel those emotions, but you realise this is a professional relationship and those feelings are coming from X, right" rather than scaring the client and going "Ew no! I'm only doing this because you pay me".

your icon...

[hey_mayonegg]

[romp]

Rotem said becoming emotionally attached to someone is part of the therapy, and the patient is always aware the relationship is temporary.

If the patient becomes attached, "That is great, it's awesome because the client never allowed herself to open her heart and fall in love with someone before," Rotem said. "Being able to fall in love is a skill, it's something we learn." Rotem said. "No one can take this skill from [the patient]."

Yikes. That sounds problematic to me. It sounds like some idealized temple prostitute concept. Hands-on to learn how to trust and fall in love?

[juunanagou18]

I don't really agree with becoming emotionally attached and "fall in love" with someone who basically a casual sex partner. It sounds like it could lead to more problems in the relationship down the road.

But, hey, maybe it does work for the women involved.

[dangerousdame]

If it works, great. But the psych student in me is thinking that this is way too personal a therapist-patient relationship (not to mention the fact that you're giving them what they want, rather than teaching them how to get it.)

[tin_foil_hat]

I think it's less about 'giving them sex' and more about teaching them skills, either for their own sexual pleasure, or their partner's.

[tin_foil_hat]

"Cooper said even if she could refer patients to surrogate partners, in most situations, she would not. Often times, particularly with men who are late virgins, it's more important to address underlying social issues than simply "cure" a patient of his virginity, she said. Um... you totally missed the point. That would be the same as sending someone to a regular sex-worker. The point is to help fix sexual issues, not just get them laid.

However, Mr. Hippie Sexual Surrogate does sound like he's muddling up love and sex.