Surrogate offered $10,000 to abort baby

Mar 04, 2013 18:46

(CNN) -- Crystal Kelley ran through the calendar once again in her head ( Read more... )

adoption, **trigger warning, abortion

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Comments 358

soliano March 5 2013, 11:49:33 UTC
What a heart wrenching story. Touches on just about every issue regarding surrogacy.

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natyanayaki March 5 2013, 12:28:28 UTC
I know :-(

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mahasin March 5 2013, 12:01:54 UTC
I'd add crappy surrogates, but that's cause I think Kelley is a crappy person.

It wasn't her choice to make.

And honestly, I hate people who are against abortion but a-ok with IVF. Fucking hypocrites.

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natyanayaki March 5 2013, 12:32:35 UTC
I agree and I disagree. On the one hand, she did sign a contract in which she waived her privacy rights and agreed to an abortion under certain conditions, on the other hand it's her body and nothing should be done to it without her consent. So which consent is paramount? Her consent at the time of signing, or her consent right before the abortion? I don't think she should be forced to have an abortion against her will, even though she signed the contract, even though it's not her child, but if she goes against the wishes of the said parents, then does she forfeit her salary? Should she be required to return her fee?

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mahasin March 5 2013, 13:20:23 UTC
I think that when you agree to be a surrogate you are kind of giving up the decision making regarding your own uterus and body. I mean, lets say in order to ensure a healthy birth of the baby she needed to get some sort of shot, does she have the right to refuse those shots if it means the fetus wouldn't survive ( ... )

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natyanayaki March 5 2013, 13:42:23 UTC
If she's morally against abortion, then why sign a contract with an abortion clause? Why ask for more money?

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cindyanne1 March 5 2013, 12:31:07 UTC
In my opinion, if you are offering your uterus up for surrogacy, then you are temporarily giving the decision-making regarding said uterus to someone else. That's kind of what surrogacy is, isn't it?

When the surrogate is also a bio parent, yes... I think there is more of an argument for the surrogate's wishes. In this case, though... I think the surrogate was in the wrong.

It bothers me that the bio parents could force an abortion on their surrogate, because it bothers me that anyone could force an abortion on anyone. But yet it ALSO bothers me that the surrogate could force a birth of a bio child on the parents. That shouldn't happen either.

And just because of the nature of surrogacy (uterus for rent, basically) I feel the people doing the "hiring" should have more say as to what happens to what was to be their child. Sure the surrogate might feel terrible about what happens, but IMO it was what she was agreeing to when she ventured into surrogacy.

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natyanayaki March 5 2013, 12:37:46 UTC
Yeah, I'm having a hard time deciding actually. On the one hand, she did sign a contract in which she waived her privacy rights and agreed to an abortion under certain conditions, on the other hand it's her body and nothing should be done to it without her consent. So which consent is paramount? Her consent at the time of signing, or her consent right before the abortion? I don't think she should be forced to have an abortion against her will, even though she signed the contract, even though it's not her child, but if she goes against the wishes of the said parents, then does she forfeit her salary? Should she be required to return her fee?

I don't have the answers, but that's not a big deal. The problem is, our legal society hasn't caught up to the technology, there's no uniform consensus and things like this happen. It's kind of a mess...

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cindyanne1 March 5 2013, 13:03:51 UTC
Yeah, it's just messed up all around. :(

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mingemonster March 5 2013, 13:59:11 UTC
So which consent is paramount? Her consent at the time of signing, or her consent right before the abortion?

If a woman signed a contract like that before entering into a relationship, would you support the fathers rights to force her into an abortion?

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shadwrayvn March 5 2013, 12:42:17 UTC
I feel really conflicted over this since surrogacy is technically a business transaction & the child really isnt her & the parent are paying for it but at the same time no one should be forced to have an abortion. This is a horrible situation all around.

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natyanayaki March 5 2013, 13:00:56 UTC
I know what you mean. On the one hand, it seems that she waived her rights when she agreed to an abortion under certain conditions, on the other hand it is her (hormonal) body and she should be able to change her mind. Ugh, but it is a business transaction...a breach of contract, so if the incubator (I know that sounds horrible but in surrogacies...) changes her mind, does she then forfeit her salary? Should she have to give a refund?

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tnganon March 6 2013, 06:33:29 UTC
i love how you said up above that you didn't think of her as an incubator, and then you actually fucking call her that.

psa that voice that says it sounds horrible? you should try listening to it.

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natyanayaki March 6 2013, 06:58:58 UTC
I have said several times that I have a bias against surrogacy for profit for many reasons, including the fact that it essentially reduces a woman to her reproductive bits, and that it does not sit well with me that it's legal anywhere in the world (at least until proper standards can be established).

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wrestlingdog March 5 2013, 12:43:42 UTC
Sort of OT, but I didn't realize you could pick up a cleft lip/palate on an ultrasound.

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13oct March 5 2013, 12:45:45 UTC
It's a 3d scan from what I can tell. It's been around a for at least 5yrs or so.

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