(no subject)
EERRR yea you may or may not have noticed but my mood right now is annoyed and frustrated... yes i'm annoyed and frustrated don't see that happen very much but i am, why? well for those who don't know circumstances have been kinda hard I've been trying to work hard at my job for some of my own personal goals that i've been really trying to get down for my own self satisfaction, it's just well i can't really get them done cause my lolo died, now don't get me wrong that's not what's annoying me at all. In fact i feel sad that lolo is gone may he rest in peace. however i'm still trying to squeeze in whatever work i need done. And also i'm a camp counselor at OLP summer camp which is probalby more tiring than a 5 hour tennis match i take care of the kinder and first graders and they are a handful! So as you can see my schedule is on a very tight and it's very stressful and i'm trying my best do everything but of course things always change or don't go as planned and it's just tough.
So this is what's frustrating or annoying to me: the closest people in my life who i count on for support and stability in my life sometimes just make it worse. They either create new stressors, or do things that have in the past already annoyed me or is a problem. And what annoys me about it is they don't want to admit it and the people around me are too scared or don't want to confront them about it. And what really gets me fired up is they think they're right and doing the right thing and just frustrates me. And if they aren't doing that then they're making me feel bad about things i can't controll or criticize my decisions,make me feel stupid, belittle my decisions or just make me feel guilty and regret whatever choice i make, and even if it maybe out of concern it doesn't help when i'm trying to balance everything and all they can say or imply is you're not balancing everything properly and it sucks cause it comes from the people i really count on for support, which at least i don't think i ask for very often and if i do well thank you for giving it to me just right now this is how i feel.
And if you're reading this and are wondering gosh i wonder who "they" are it could be anybody it could be you it could be someone else, and they are not a specific gender or age group, they could be old and young pretty much anyone. I'm using they cause i'm not here to put anyone on blast just let out my feelings cause although these feelings are being written out now, they're feelings i've experienced before it's just the circumstances are making the experience more intollerable okae anyway that's it for now i'll have a less annoyed update sometime....
p.s. writing out you feelings can really help sometimes
So this is what's frustrating or annoying to me: the closest people in my life who i count on for support and stability in my life sometimes just make it worse. They either create new stressors, or do things that have in the past already annoyed me or is a problem. And what annoys me about it is they don't want to admit it and the people around me are too scared or don't want to confront them about it. And what really gets me fired up is they think they're right and doing the right thing and just frustrates me. And if they aren't doing that then they're making me feel bad about things i can't controll or criticize my decisions,make me feel stupid, belittle my decisions or just make me feel guilty and regret whatever choice i make, and even if it maybe out of concern it doesn't help when i'm trying to balance everything and all they can say or imply is you're not balancing everything properly and it sucks cause it comes from the people i really count on for support, which at least i don't think i ask for very often and if i do well thank you for giving it to me just right now this is how i feel.
And if you're reading this and are wondering gosh i wonder who "they" are it could be anybody it could be you it could be someone else, and they are not a specific gender or age group, they could be old and young pretty much anyone. I'm using they cause i'm not here to put anyone on blast just let out my feelings cause although these feelings are being written out now, they're feelings i've experienced before it's just the circumstances are making the experience more intollerable okae anyway that's it for now i'll have a less annoyed update sometime....
p.s. writing out you feelings can really help sometimes