Going back to England. That makes me wince internally. I obviously said the wrong thing there. I doubt there's much of a force in the world that would get him back to England any time soon. I know *I* probably should never be allowed in that country due to my homicidal feelings towards Mr. Wyndam-Pryce senior. And I'm so not thinking about those right now
( ... )
And we're back to the whole name thing. Which I know Angel thinks should be both our decisions, but I don't agree. I'll never get him to see that though, unless I want to risk another argument. I'm to tired and far to exhausted in fact to actually go through that again. Not even with Lorne as mediator. We seem to be doing fine thus far, but with both of us tired it's like waiting for trouble
( ... )
I smile as Wes muses about the name. If I didn't know that he was so worn out, I might think that he was about to go into lecture mode on the implications of having two last names in Los Angeles versus in England. He probably will someday. And I won't mind then either
( ... )
Oh! Blood! Dammit, I'd forgotten about that. I'm sure with all that's been happening Angel will need some blood. Not sure why I'd think that, since I really don't feel like eating. But I'm not a vampire and Angel is. It works differently with him I think. At any other given time I'd have asked, written it down and be fascinated by it no doubt. Right now though? All I really want is to sleep
( ... )
I smile at the kiss to my nose. Absolutely adorable. Getting up after him, I watch as he plods sleepily back to our suite while I head for the stairs. I'm a little surprised he didn't fall asleep with Connor, but there was so much newness, I can understand how a little fatigue might go unnoticed
( ... )
There's fussing. Not the usual tossing and turning that'll shake the bed. No it's subtle and small but still-- there's fussing. And a heartbeat that's not mine. I keep my eyes closed, feeling as though I barely had a few minutes of sleep. I don't know what time it is, nor do I want to know. Instead I focus on the heartbeat under my hand. There's a heartbeat under my hand. That's-- strange
( ... )
Huh. I didn't even notice I fell asleep. The bed shifts though, and I hear some quiet, repetitive noises next to me, like Wes having a bad dream. I scoot instinctively closer, ready to prod myself up and comfort more fully, but then the noise stops and I relax somewhat. I rub my face against the pillow and curl in closer- Oh, there's talking. What's with the talking? Wes doesn't usually talk. Does he
( ... )
It's not until I stumble into the bathroom and switch on the light - which causes both Connor and I to blink several times - that I realize a few things. One is that I must know this apartment blindly by now to walk over here in complete darkness. The second is that Lorne did indeed put the diapers here, which my subconscious must've figured out. I wonder if we should get Connor his own room, and then have a chancing table there
( ... )
I nod sleepily when Wes asks me to hand him the bag, stepping into the bathroom, and not only seeing Connor smile, but hearing a little gurgling that can only be identified as a giggle. Oh good. Someone to enjoy Wes's sense of humor. He really doesn't have enough people who do. I pull out some of the baby things and set them out for Wes while he holds onto Connor
( ... )
Once the bag is within reach it's easier to get things done one handed. Still, it would be more useful if we'd get one of those commode's where the things we need are even more within reach. Also safer for the child, wont be able to roll of that quickly. God, we're going to need so many bloody things.
I grab a diaper, the bottle of powder things, the-- arse wipes, for lack of a better word. One I have those, I'm able to do this a little beter. Its a lot harder then the first time I did this, since the diaper is now-- well, full. Still, it's almost routine, the actions done automatically.
"Hmmm? I did?" Confused I glance at Connor, who seems to be far happier, if not once again sleepier now that he's clean. I made him laugh? He didn't do that before? I think he did, but it's not as though I was paying attention to that perse. I'm betting Lorne beat us both to the laughing thing, considering he's-- Lorne. Remarkably good with babies too he was. Is
( ... )
Hmm. I try to think back. Okay, so most of it is clouded with Wes and our lack of communication, but I'm pretty sure.... "Don't think so," I murmur back, still feeling a cloud of sleep around us. "It's pretty cute when he laughs though, isn't it?" I say looking at Connor like- like the adoring parent I'm already turning into
( ... )
The look of sleepy confusion on his face when I hand him Connor is utterly adorable. It makes a smile slip on my face. One I suppose is equally as tired, though far less adorable. If not at all. He looks so... normal when he holds his son. Almost human if you will. Anyone not knowing what Angel is would never have guessed there is a demon lurking inside him. The way he looks at his son with some much love is almost painful
( ... )
I start to get worried when Wes doesn't agree with me right away, since it's not like I know what I'm doing but he...seems to think better of it? and says he'll get the bottle. Oh, that's good. I wouldn't know what I was doing if I had to get one. He'll have to show me when it's not the middle of the night and we're both half asleep. I'm so amazed how well he seems to be taking to this. Like he's trying to- Like he's trying to prove himself? Like he's trying to prove that he can do at least this for me now. Is that what he thinks? He's turned his faithful servant vow in another direction now that- now that Connor's here? To replace himStopping. Stopping that thought process right there. This is how all this miscommunication starts. My imagination runs wild and there are just too many thoughts. It's late, there's a brand new baby here, who knows what kinds of thoughts are running through my head, and here they are coming up with this. There's no way I'm saying anything about this. Not a peep. It's just me being crazy
( ... )
Where are my glasses? I keep - Or Angel keeps I should say - putting them on the most inconvenient places lately that I find myself looking for them everywhere. Which is why I almost want to slap myself when I notice them on the nightstand. Where they should be. Where I no doubt put them myself when I went to bed. Sometimes I'm such an idiot. Sighing inwardly at my own stupidity I pad over to the nightstand and slip them on
( ... )
"Okay," I murmur, slightly worried at being left alone with Connor - with my own son - but Wes is already walking out the door. Lorne is around somewhere. I'm sure he'd coming running if something happened
( ... )
A smile slips out at those words and I wonder why they sound different now then the many times he's said them before. Perhaps because it's 'we' instead of the usual 'I'. There's a brief wonder if from now on it'll always be 'we' for Angel, meaning Connor and him, instead of 'I'. Then there's a darker side of me if 'we' will ever mean Angel and I.
I push it aside quickly, hoping these sort of doubts are all just part of this phase we're going to have to go through. The part were we're all going to have to get used to the fact that there now is a child here. Angel's son. His *actual* son. The son of two vampires and my mind still cannot wrap around that. Fingers itching to hunt down books and research this. Now.
There are other important things though. Such as feeding a child that might go hungry, even though Connor looks rather sleepy instead of hungry. I've no idea if we're doing anything right, but we're doing the best we can. There's a child at stake. *Your* best is not going to be good enough"I'll be right over," I murmur,
( ... )
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I grab a diaper, the bottle of powder things, the-- arse wipes, for lack of a better word. One I have those, I'm able to do this a little beter. Its a lot harder then the first time I did this, since the diaper is now-- well, full. Still, it's almost routine, the actions done automatically.
"Hmmm? I did?" Confused I glance at Connor, who seems to be far happier, if not once again sleepier now that he's clean. I made him laugh? He didn't do that before? I think he did, but it's not as though I was paying attention to that perse. I'm betting Lorne beat us both to the laughing thing, considering he's-- Lorne. Remarkably good with babies too he was. Is ( ... )
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I push it aside quickly, hoping these sort of doubts are all just part of this phase we're going to have to go through. The part were we're all going to have to get used to the fact that there now is a child here. Angel's son. His *actual* son. The son of two vampires and my mind still cannot wrap around that. Fingers itching to hunt down books and research this. Now.
There are other important things though. Such as feeding a child that might go hungry, even though Connor looks rather sleepy instead of hungry. I've no idea if we're doing anything right, but we're doing the best we can. There's a child at stake. *Your* best is not going to be good enough"I'll be right over," I murmur, ( ... )
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