a battleship
its two thirty in the morning & im up, at will's apartment, waiting for him to get off work so i'm not sitting here chilling with sebastian by myself. i already walked around rushton park like three times by myself, & i'd walk down to the one next to the donnelly house but it's dark & cold & i dont feel like it.
so, shit, anyway. monday was my birthday. will took me out, it was good. my mom got me a present & has actually been really nice to me lately. i think she must be having some kind of sex spurt with jeff or something. my dad is officially fired from bellsouth & was turned down by social security - for the first time in my entire life, my dad is unemployed. after thirty five years with the same company, no less. i haven't spoken to my nana since st. patrick's day. i've never gone that long with out talking to her in my entire life - i mean she lives right next to me for god's sake. i got texts from three different people on thursday night. usually i would have been all crazy & happy because i got to talk to them but this time it just didn't matter. moving on is magic. there's not a lot shit going on for me other than i've finally learned how to be happy & how to make something out of my life. this fall i'll be going back to uab & hell i might even quit my job & get another kiddy one. im tired of being tied down right now, i'm too young to live my life like im fucking forty. fuck that. my hair is finally growing back out & ive never been so excited. i've got two great friends & i couldn't ask for better people in my life. then there's will & that shit is just plain awesome. for once the military is hot. yesterday was andrew's birthday. i didn't call him because he broke my heart on mine. i never thought after all these years that we would get to a point where phone conversations meant for birthday wishes were rushed & forced. but when he called me on mine i realized how far apart we've grown. i hate to think there will be a time that he won't be in my life anymore but i have this feeling that we're on the brink of that cliff as it is. i can't really think of anymore to say other than i wish i was high right now. it'd be a lot easier to watch mario lopez on extra.
so, shit, anyway. monday was my birthday. will took me out, it was good. my mom got me a present & has actually been really nice to me lately. i think she must be having some kind of sex spurt with jeff or something. my dad is officially fired from bellsouth & was turned down by social security - for the first time in my entire life, my dad is unemployed. after thirty five years with the same company, no less. i haven't spoken to my nana since st. patrick's day. i've never gone that long with out talking to her in my entire life - i mean she lives right next to me for god's sake. i got texts from three different people on thursday night. usually i would have been all crazy & happy because i got to talk to them but this time it just didn't matter. moving on is magic. there's not a lot shit going on for me other than i've finally learned how to be happy & how to make something out of my life. this fall i'll be going back to uab & hell i might even quit my job & get another kiddy one. im tired of being tied down right now, i'm too young to live my life like im fucking forty. fuck that. my hair is finally growing back out & ive never been so excited. i've got two great friends & i couldn't ask for better people in my life. then there's will & that shit is just plain awesome. for once the military is hot. yesterday was andrew's birthday. i didn't call him because he broke my heart on mine. i never thought after all these years that we would get to a point where phone conversations meant for birthday wishes were rushed & forced. but when he called me on mine i realized how far apart we've grown. i hate to think there will be a time that he won't be in my life anymore but i have this feeling that we're on the brink of that cliff as it is. i can't really think of anymore to say other than i wish i was high right now. it'd be a lot easier to watch mario lopez on extra.