sunday night's dreams
my dream came in 3 parts.
i was in my apartment and 2 people kept trying to break in to kill me. they had a key to the deadbolt, so the only thing holding them back was the chain on the door. if i didn't sit with my back against the door, holding it closed, they opened the door as far as the chain would allow and my cats would start walking out of the apartment. one of the people who wanted to kill me picked up weiner and told me that he would hurt my cat if i didn't let him inside. he started pinching weiner's toes. i ran out and took weiner away from him and brought him back inside, but still weiner and my other cats would go out the door anytime they got it open.
i was trying to call 911. i couldn't hit the right buttons on the phone. then i would hit the right buttons, but it would send me to some sort of answering machine. finally i got through and they said they were sending the police. i waited and waited and finally an officer showed up. she seemed like a really nice person, so i trusted her. she talked to me to find out what was happening, then she went and found the people who wanted to kill me, but she said there was nothing she could do about it. she didn't have reason enough to arrest them. after she left, the people came right back to my door, trying to break it down. i called 911 again, only it put me straight through to the officer who had been there earlier. she said she was on her way back. i waited and waited. i thought they'd kill me before she got there. one of them kept stabbing a knife through the door, so i couldn't lean back on it to keep it closed. they cut open the bottom of my foot. they were sawing away at the security chain, i was bleeding on the floor, and all of my precious cats were missing.
when the cop finally showed up again, she wound up shooting one of the people, and that person was taken away in an ambulance. the officer told me that she didn't think the second person would come after me anymore, because the first person was the one who started everything. i hoped she was right but was still terrified. after she left, i sat in my apartment for a very long time, afraid to go anywhere out of sight from my front door. i knew the second person would come back to kill me. (this dream actually lasted a lot longer, with many more episodes of my killers coming and calling the cops and waiting a long time for the police officer until she showed up and did nothing, etc) i was very scared and couldn't rest...
a nice woman took me into her home. she had a family... a husband and two school-aged sons. she took me in... like i was a homeless kid or something. except i wasn't. but i was glad to be in her home because i finally felt safe. it was in the same neighborhood that my apartment was in. i could see my apartment from her house, but i wasn't afraid anymore because her house was big and strong and had locks on the doors.
(she had an amazon parrot living in the garage but she didn't know how to take very good care of it. the parrot liked me and i felt bad for it. it was in a small, rusty cage and had no toys to play with. and it kept getting cold in the garage.)
i followed the woman around her house because i didn't know what else to do and was still scared that someone was going to kill me. she kept talking to me. i don't remember what she was saying, but it made me feel safe. i wondered how old she thought i was, because i was aware of the fact that adults don't treat each other as nice as they treat kids. we went into the bathroom and she had me take a shower. the water started falling on me before i had my clothes off. i got undressed and stood in the hot shower and thought that i could sit on the floor and stay there and be safe forever as long as no one else knew where i was. i could just sit in the hot shower and be warm and safe...
the woman went to work during the weekdays, and her kids went to school. she also had a baby girl, an infant, and she wanted me to take care of the baby while she was at work. one day i realized that i had been forgetting to take care of the baby for quite a while. i went upstairs to get the thing, and her diaper fell off as soon as i picked her up because she was too thin, and she started peeing everywhere. i didn't know where the clean diapers were, so i forgot about it. i brought her back downstairs and started trying to figure out what i should feed her. i finally found a complicated looking machine that was supposed to make baby formula. it had powder everywhere and lots of buttons and knobs and i didn't know what the fuck i was doing. i started crying because i didn't know how to feed the baby, and i was sure the woman was going to be mad at me when she got home.
suddenly, my mom showed up. she took one look at the baby and started yelling at me, telling me what an incompetent idiot i was, such a cruel person, and what did i think i was doing, taking care of another human being? she said that the woman must not have known how much of a horrible person i was. (go tell her then, mom.) i really did hate that baby, and i hated my mom too, so i gave the baby to my mom and i left and went to leelanau, hoping no one would notice that i already graduated 8 years ago.
i was in my apartment and 2 people kept trying to break in to kill me. they had a key to the deadbolt, so the only thing holding them back was the chain on the door. if i didn't sit with my back against the door, holding it closed, they opened the door as far as the chain would allow and my cats would start walking out of the apartment. one of the people who wanted to kill me picked up weiner and told me that he would hurt my cat if i didn't let him inside. he started pinching weiner's toes. i ran out and took weiner away from him and brought him back inside, but still weiner and my other cats would go out the door anytime they got it open.
i was trying to call 911. i couldn't hit the right buttons on the phone. then i would hit the right buttons, but it would send me to some sort of answering machine. finally i got through and they said they were sending the police. i waited and waited and finally an officer showed up. she seemed like a really nice person, so i trusted her. she talked to me to find out what was happening, then she went and found the people who wanted to kill me, but she said there was nothing she could do about it. she didn't have reason enough to arrest them. after she left, the people came right back to my door, trying to break it down. i called 911 again, only it put me straight through to the officer who had been there earlier. she said she was on her way back. i waited and waited. i thought they'd kill me before she got there. one of them kept stabbing a knife through the door, so i couldn't lean back on it to keep it closed. they cut open the bottom of my foot. they were sawing away at the security chain, i was bleeding on the floor, and all of my precious cats were missing.
when the cop finally showed up again, she wound up shooting one of the people, and that person was taken away in an ambulance. the officer told me that she didn't think the second person would come after me anymore, because the first person was the one who started everything. i hoped she was right but was still terrified. after she left, i sat in my apartment for a very long time, afraid to go anywhere out of sight from my front door. i knew the second person would come back to kill me. (this dream actually lasted a lot longer, with many more episodes of my killers coming and calling the cops and waiting a long time for the police officer until she showed up and did nothing, etc) i was very scared and couldn't rest...
a nice woman took me into her home. she had a family... a husband and two school-aged sons. she took me in... like i was a homeless kid or something. except i wasn't. but i was glad to be in her home because i finally felt safe. it was in the same neighborhood that my apartment was in. i could see my apartment from her house, but i wasn't afraid anymore because her house was big and strong and had locks on the doors.
(she had an amazon parrot living in the garage but she didn't know how to take very good care of it. the parrot liked me and i felt bad for it. it was in a small, rusty cage and had no toys to play with. and it kept getting cold in the garage.)
i followed the woman around her house because i didn't know what else to do and was still scared that someone was going to kill me. she kept talking to me. i don't remember what she was saying, but it made me feel safe. i wondered how old she thought i was, because i was aware of the fact that adults don't treat each other as nice as they treat kids. we went into the bathroom and she had me take a shower. the water started falling on me before i had my clothes off. i got undressed and stood in the hot shower and thought that i could sit on the floor and stay there and be safe forever as long as no one else knew where i was. i could just sit in the hot shower and be warm and safe...
the woman went to work during the weekdays, and her kids went to school. she also had a baby girl, an infant, and she wanted me to take care of the baby while she was at work. one day i realized that i had been forgetting to take care of the baby for quite a while. i went upstairs to get the thing, and her diaper fell off as soon as i picked her up because she was too thin, and she started peeing everywhere. i didn't know where the clean diapers were, so i forgot about it. i brought her back downstairs and started trying to figure out what i should feed her. i finally found a complicated looking machine that was supposed to make baby formula. it had powder everywhere and lots of buttons and knobs and i didn't know what the fuck i was doing. i started crying because i didn't know how to feed the baby, and i was sure the woman was going to be mad at me when she got home.
suddenly, my mom showed up. she took one look at the baby and started yelling at me, telling me what an incompetent idiot i was, such a cruel person, and what did i think i was doing, taking care of another human being? she said that the woman must not have known how much of a horrible person i was. (go tell her then, mom.) i really did hate that baby, and i hated my mom too, so i gave the baby to my mom and i left and went to leelanau, hoping no one would notice that i already graduated 8 years ago.