The weekend and beyond...
WARNING! Do not read this if you do not ... I repeat... do not want to know about my life.
I think it has been over a month since I last looked at these pages or even contemplated updating it. I guess I have not really had a lot to say or either I just have not wanted to take the time to put the words down here. Maybe there is some reason behind it all, maybe I do not want to think about everything that has been going on in my life. In all honesty, my life is pretty good... no complaints. So what is the reason I have been feeling down and out? I wish there was some magic note that appeared with the answers written on the it just for you or maybe walk outside and see the answer written in the clouds or the stars. So much for fantasies.
My best friend is leaving for SoCal in a few weeks. I should clarify that... he is moving to Cali to go live. Escaping from the mess that was his marriage, escaping the nightmare that he never saw coming. I know that he needs to go, in fact I am the one that told him that he should leave in order to get his life back on track. Find some peace within himself... screw that... find some distractions that will eventually lead him to acceptance. His marriage is over and with that marriage goes his home, his job, his once future, his once family and his once best friend and once lover - his once wife. Talk about just standing there and having someone walk up and smack you in the side of the head without any warning... that is what his soon to be ex-wife did. I am talking out of the blue "It is over between you and I." What do you do in that circumstance? Where do you turn... actually... when do you stop turning? All I have been doing these last few weeks (months) is giving him support, that is what best friends do right? This is bumming me out, but what can you do?
WARNING! If you are still reading this, you might want to stop now cause now is that part of the journal that deals with my marriage.
For the last 3 years, my wife has been in school. She graduated last week from a prominent University with honors in Nursing. Officially she is finished with school in August, a month that feels like will never get here. I can honestly say that this has been the longest 3 years in my entire life and now that it is almost complete I find myself full of doubt. Which is strange seeing that I should be filled with relief and joy that I am finally getting my life back on track. The last 2 years has been pathetic, insanely pathetic. I am not going to complain about the work that I do around the house, cause I know that it is needed and if I do not do it then it probably not going to clean itself. Cooking the dinners, cleaning, taking care of the dog and cats, making sure the oil changes are up to date, rotating the tires on the vehicles and so on and so on. Those are the things that I am all more then willing to do, cause frankly I enjoy having someone to take care of. Then there is the issue of her and I and where we are at in our marriage. I can tell anyone that the relationship between us is fairly solid in most things... yeah we have had counseling and all the other stuff that goes along with being married, but who hasn't? What bothers me the most is that since she has gone back to school is the lack of attention she gives me physically. I get that the stress level of going back to school goes up because of the studying and such... heck, I know that she is stressed because she also works full time... ughh... what I am trying to say is that all this lack of attention has given me a lot of anxiety. That is not a good thing is it? I really do not think it is and some of the people I have talked to tell me that everything will get better after all of this is over. I can only hope and pray that it will be all fine and dandy.
Other then that, I bought her a brand new spanking vehicle a few weeks ago. A 2007 Subaru Outback and it very pretty to behold! I give her shit that it is a 'station wagon' and not really a 'chick mobile', in which case she tells me that it all okay with her. She must be getting old or something along those lines.
We went to the baseball game last night and had a very good time. Coors field at 6PM, the sun just right and a nice little breeze to help push out those balls over the outfield fence. Rockies did win against the Giants 6 - 2 with a couple of home runs to boot. Seventh Inning Stretch and singing "Take me out to the ball game..." is something everyone should experience at least once in their lives.
Friday night we had gone to my parents billiards and bar where my older sister was working... I was the designated driver for the night (fine with me since I rarely drink). Niki and Jeff got shit-faced which was actually pretty funning watching them play pool and then complaining that I was winning each and every game against them. I guess when the drinks and pool are free, that is the thing to do. We were out until 4 in the morning just having a good time. Finally got home and crashed, only to be up 4 hours later doing massage on Saturday. Fun stuff doing massage when you can barely stand on your own two feet.
WARNING has ended... it is officially okay to go back reading for all those that did not want to know about my more personal life.
I used to play Ultima Online a lot a few years ago, but decided just to up and give most of my items away. That included my much prized over sized pixel house near the Dungeon of Despise and the Wind Entrance. I actually gave my house to someone else then who I originally had planned on giving it to, alas that person and I ended things not quite on note. The person I ended up giving it to has kept the house the same as when I had left it to her. She says I can have it back at anytime I want, but that is not in my plans. I kept my house located in Malas, out in the middle of nowhere and recently redesigned it. Something I enjoy doing a lot on the game is decorating and designing houses for not just myself but for other people. The game is just not the same, the experience has lessened and the connections are gone. Guess that is what happens when you go away from something you truly enjoy. Like salt in a old wound, things cannot go back to how they used to be, no matter how much we wish them to.
Well, bed time for this little chicken. Lot's of work to do tomorrow and money to be made.
I think it has been over a month since I last looked at these pages or even contemplated updating it. I guess I have not really had a lot to say or either I just have not wanted to take the time to put the words down here. Maybe there is some reason behind it all, maybe I do not want to think about everything that has been going on in my life. In all honesty, my life is pretty good... no complaints. So what is the reason I have been feeling down and out? I wish there was some magic note that appeared with the answers written on the it just for you or maybe walk outside and see the answer written in the clouds or the stars. So much for fantasies.
My best friend is leaving for SoCal in a few weeks. I should clarify that... he is moving to Cali to go live. Escaping from the mess that was his marriage, escaping the nightmare that he never saw coming. I know that he needs to go, in fact I am the one that told him that he should leave in order to get his life back on track. Find some peace within himself... screw that... find some distractions that will eventually lead him to acceptance. His marriage is over and with that marriage goes his home, his job, his once future, his once family and his once best friend and once lover - his once wife. Talk about just standing there and having someone walk up and smack you in the side of the head without any warning... that is what his soon to be ex-wife did. I am talking out of the blue "It is over between you and I." What do you do in that circumstance? Where do you turn... actually... when do you stop turning? All I have been doing these last few weeks (months) is giving him support, that is what best friends do right? This is bumming me out, but what can you do?
WARNING! If you are still reading this, you might want to stop now cause now is that part of the journal that deals with my marriage.
For the last 3 years, my wife has been in school. She graduated last week from a prominent University with honors in Nursing. Officially she is finished with school in August, a month that feels like will never get here. I can honestly say that this has been the longest 3 years in my entire life and now that it is almost complete I find myself full of doubt. Which is strange seeing that I should be filled with relief and joy that I am finally getting my life back on track. The last 2 years has been pathetic, insanely pathetic. I am not going to complain about the work that I do around the house, cause I know that it is needed and if I do not do it then it probably not going to clean itself. Cooking the dinners, cleaning, taking care of the dog and cats, making sure the oil changes are up to date, rotating the tires on the vehicles and so on and so on. Those are the things that I am all more then willing to do, cause frankly I enjoy having someone to take care of. Then there is the issue of her and I and where we are at in our marriage. I can tell anyone that the relationship between us is fairly solid in most things... yeah we have had counseling and all the other stuff that goes along with being married, but who hasn't? What bothers me the most is that since she has gone back to school is the lack of attention she gives me physically. I get that the stress level of going back to school goes up because of the studying and such... heck, I know that she is stressed because she also works full time... ughh... what I am trying to say is that all this lack of attention has given me a lot of anxiety. That is not a good thing is it? I really do not think it is and some of the people I have talked to tell me that everything will get better after all of this is over. I can only hope and pray that it will be all fine and dandy.
Other then that, I bought her a brand new spanking vehicle a few weeks ago. A 2007 Subaru Outback and it very pretty to behold! I give her shit that it is a 'station wagon' and not really a 'chick mobile', in which case she tells me that it all okay with her. She must be getting old or something along those lines.
We went to the baseball game last night and had a very good time. Coors field at 6PM, the sun just right and a nice little breeze to help push out those balls over the outfield fence. Rockies did win against the Giants 6 - 2 with a couple of home runs to boot. Seventh Inning Stretch and singing "Take me out to the ball game..." is something everyone should experience at least once in their lives.
Friday night we had gone to my parents billiards and bar where my older sister was working... I was the designated driver for the night (fine with me since I rarely drink). Niki and Jeff got shit-faced which was actually pretty funning watching them play pool and then complaining that I was winning each and every game against them. I guess when the drinks and pool are free, that is the thing to do. We were out until 4 in the morning just having a good time. Finally got home and crashed, only to be up 4 hours later doing massage on Saturday. Fun stuff doing massage when you can barely stand on your own two feet.
WARNING has ended... it is officially okay to go back reading for all those that did not want to know about my more personal life.
I used to play Ultima Online a lot a few years ago, but decided just to up and give most of my items away. That included my much prized over sized pixel house near the Dungeon of Despise and the Wind Entrance. I actually gave my house to someone else then who I originally had planned on giving it to, alas that person and I ended things not quite on note. The person I ended up giving it to has kept the house the same as when I had left it to her. She says I can have it back at anytime I want, but that is not in my plans. I kept my house located in Malas, out in the middle of nowhere and recently redesigned it. Something I enjoy doing a lot on the game is decorating and designing houses for not just myself but for other people. The game is just not the same, the experience has lessened and the connections are gone. Guess that is what happens when you go away from something you truly enjoy. Like salt in a old wound, things cannot go back to how they used to be, no matter how much we wish them to.
Well, bed time for this little chicken. Lot's of work to do tomorrow and money to be made.