ONTD Original: What the Fuck is a Quibi - Part 3
Quibi has become my favourite disaster. Sure, it launched at the worst possible time, but even without a global pandemic keeping many people at home, I am not sure Quibi would ever have been a hit among their millennials-on-the-go core demographic. It’s been a few months since we last checked in on Quibi, what have they been up to?
Well, for the most part, they’ve been finding ways to keep flushing money down the toilet. From terrible conversion rates on their free trials, to undepaying and devaluing Black creators, and the possibility of a sale, things aren’t going too well for Jeffrey Katzenberg’s pet project. But hey, someone finally decided to pirate some of their content, so at least one person cares!
#HIPANDRELATEABLE
Click to viewOne of the funniest developments over the last few months is the growing realization of just how out-of-touch CEO Meg Whitman (64) and Founder Jeffrey Katzenberg (69) are with their target demographic of millennials (~25 - 40). When asked about what kind of television she enjoys watching, Whitman responded with, "I'm not sure I'd classify myself as an entertainment enthusiast," but did concede that she watched Grant, “on the History Channel. It's about President Grant.”[1] Although it is a mini-series and not a full season of TV, so I guess in a way that is like a ‘quibi’ of content?
Whitman was also a speaker at the Democratic National Convention (hilarious considering she has run for office as a Republican and also didn’t vote for over 20 years)[2], where she was billed as the former CEO of Hewlett-Packard and not the current CEO of Quibi.
Note that the DNC identifies Meg Whitman as the former CEO of HP, not the current CEO of Quibi. https://t.co/wa1gnbhFlQ
- Alex Kotch (@alexkotch) August 17, 2020
Katzenberg, for his part, seems to flounder even more when it comes to what kind of content people are looking for. When Gal Gadot visited the Quibi offices to promote programming that gives a voice to girls and women, Katzenberg remarked that she should do a fitness show for Quibi, in the style of Jane Fonda. “Apparently, [Gadot’s] face fell,” reported an insider.[3]
WHERE HAVE ALL THE SUBSCRIBERS GONE?
Quibi reportedly lost 90 percent of early users after their free trials expired https://t.co/hoc2Bblmwz pic.twitter.com/vItyyLKYkL
- The Verge (@verge) July 8, 2020
Quibi’s subscription numbers were never top-notch, reportedly on track for 2 million users at year’s end (far below their target of 7.4 million).[4] Perhaps part of this can be blamed on a poor marketing campaign - one market researcher found that 70% of the people they surveyed thought Quibi is a food delivery service.[5] But a more significant factor is the abysmal conversion rates Quibi saw from those who signed up for a free trial to paid accounts. One particularly damning report claimed Quibi lost 92% of their free trials users when it came time to pay up.[6] Quibi quickly released a statement countering the claim, stating “Our conversion from download to trial is above mobile app benchmarks, and we are seeing excellent conversion to paid subscribers.”[7] Quibi did not release any measurable data with this claim, and I remain unconvinced.
Perhaps in an effort the stem the bleed of customers leaving the service, Quibi launched a free, ad-supported tier in Australia and New Zealand.[8] No word yet if this will be rolled out in more countries.
QUIBI <3 UNPAID LABOUR
In July, ONTD’s own chescaleigh (Franchesca Ramsey) tweeted about how Quibi is trying to get unpaid work out of creators - apparently their $1.8 billion dollar budget can only go so far. A marketing agency hired by Quibi to promote their truly terrible show Dummy reached out to Ramsey for an “opportunity” to produce uncompensated work that would maybe lead to paid work. Cool cool cool cool cool.
Great news! @Quibi has asked me to submit 2 unpaid pitches by EOD tomorrow for a chance to *possibly* be paid to promote their “feminist-centric” comedy starring Anna Kendrick!
Yeah. Pass. pic.twitter.com/GGem4mJ6xM
- Franchesca Ramsey (@chescaleigh) July 15, 2020
The real cherry on top came later that day, when Ramsey followed up that she had heard from another creator (who is presumably white) that they were offered compensation up front.
small update. another influencer just DM'd to let me know she was offered a flat fee up front (which was then doubled) for this same opportunity, 1 video with no request for unpaid pitches...interesting!
and yes. she is. https://t.co/xtiE2eiIXN
- Franchesca Ramsey (@chescaleigh) July 15, 2020
"QUIBI'S SUBREDDIT IS THE SADDEST PLACE ON EARTH"
I could not come up with a better title for this section than the folks at Input Magazine already did. Writing about the streaming service’s Reddit presence, they state “The sub can generously be described as a mix of limp astroturfing and complaints about the platform's technical issues, lack of content, or its very concept.”[9] /r/Quibi has yet to break 1,000 users - even the much-maligned /r/Peacock has managed to triple their numbers. To their credit, users on /r/Quibi have a good sense of humour about the article.
A FEW BRIGHT SPOTS
In an effort to be a balanced and fair journalist (snarker), I will say Quibi has had some small wins. Three months after launch, users can finally screenshot content! Sure, it’s kinda convoluted but at least it functions, and they understand it is funny.
Everyone! start your meme maker: Mock the Golden Arm with precise photographic evidence! Share your cel-drawn horoscope with the world! Photoshop your own head onto action star @KevinHart4real! That’s right, @quibi has screenshots. Kinda. 1/6
- Tom Conrad (@tconrad) July 23, 2020
Quibi also managed to wrack up ten Emmy nominations, though they ultimately only won two since they were mostly competing against themselves in the web series categories.[10]
Last but not least, someone has finally bothered to pirate Quibi content! What a huge win for Katzenberg, who notoriously despises piracy. I am not going to tell you where, but allegedly you can find the new season of Reno 911! around the internet. No sign of any of their other shows though.
QUIBI FOR SALE?
Writers at the Wall Street Journal reported in September that Quibi is, “exploring several strategic options including a possible sale”[11] as the service has failed to turn a profit or even come close to meeting their subscriber goals. Other possible options include merging with another company or going public[12] - I know I, for one, cannot wait to invest my money during their IPO!
As previously reported, Quibi is facing money woes - executives have taken a paycut and the company needs to raise hundreds of millions of dollars to keep the lights on through the rest of 2020.
It's been about 241,920 minutes since Quibi launched on April 6. At 7 minutes a Quibi, it took about 34,560 Quibis for them to consider a sale https://t.co/77hSfVJdKY
- Michael Leibel (@leibelmichael) September 21, 2020
Very tickled that Quibi has brought in bankers to fix their business instead of, at any point, talking to a single person with experience making short-form internet content
- Siobhan Thompson, mysterious European heiress (@vornietom) October 6, 2020
The Social Network but it’s the Quibi people suing each other, both claiming it was not their idea
- Dan Perlman (@danjperlman) October 18, 2020
Even more recently, news has leaked that Katzenberg is trying to sell of Quibi’s catalogue of shows to competitors like Peacock and Facebook TV, both of which passed.[13] According to the same report, Quibi employees have been scheduling “goodbye drinks”[14] as they expect the operation to fold.
BREAKING NEWS!
Quibi is shutting itself down, according to people familiar with the matter, a crash landing for a once highflying entertainment startup that raised $1.75 billion in capital https://t.co/6RHpuxsFb1
- The Wall Street Journal (@WSJ) October 21, 2020
WORKS CITED
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14
IMAGE SOURCES
1 + me on photoshop, 2, 3, 4, 5
EMBEDDED SOURCES
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10
ONTD, place your bets in the comments: how long until Quibi sells and for how little? I am going to say January, $200 million. ETA: lol nvm