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[ohlittledeath]

i made this slightly angry/frustrated angst post a few hours ago, but decided to delete it, because...it was stupid. i'm still angry and frustrated, but i'd rather keep these feelings to myself. i'm off to work in a few hours, to talk things over with my boss. if all goes well, he won't fire me. and if he does...well, i'll worry about that later. :

Comments

[ohlittledeath]

i read this over a few times, and i think you're right about a lot of things. i know my friends from eindhoven aren't exactly the best friends i could have, mainly because, as you said before, they're involved in a totally different life/world/scene. partying, boyfriends, studying. that's pretty much all they do, and, to me, there's so much more in life than just that.

(well, i've tried to break free from them, but...well, i'm a sucker, and they managed to win me back.)

about the alcohol and medication....yes, i know. it's something i'm a bit too easy in. i know i should take into consideration that i can't drink too much, because of my medication use. but then all sense of right and wrong just shuts off in my brain, and i just do it. but you know, as long as nothing goes wrong, i'll continue drinking while under medication. typical, you know.

and i've also noticed you seem a lot more relaxed than before, other than the occasional ramblins (about youknowwho and youknowwhat, LOL!) and i'm happy to see the change.

aaaand it's okay, man! thanks for your advice and stuff. :-)

[toshiyarnr]

i know it's hard to just turn down friends. maybe you don't really need to shut off contact with them. but i guess they should realize how to treat you.
the thing that one time, with Esmee (i believe) that she got mad at you because i didn't want to come along partying. but well, they'll eventually tone down from the partying and sexing around or something.

i'm already glad you changed from partying 3 or 4 nights a week to 1 or 2. i'm not really sure about how much you go out these days.

and my occasional ramblings is just my gordon complaint side. XD i can't live without complaining.

[ohlittledeath]

i remember that night, that they were all furious that i didn't come and drag you with me. "sociale verplichtingen" better known as social control. :-/

well, i hardly really go out anymore lately...and if i do, it's just chillin' at somebody's house! so don't worry about the partying/exsessive drinking...i'm pretty much over the binge drinking. :-)

LOL i know, i know, and i'm a bit of a gordon myself...though, a bit like gerard, too. IDK IDK! you're the gordon to my gerard! LOL