(no subject)
so i have nothing better to do than to update this. im pretty depressed and sad today. i miss my boyfriend and he's off doing whatever he's doing. he usually calls me when he wakes up but today he had his phone off and when i called his moms phone (he uses it a lot) his mom answered. she went to wake him up but he wasnt home, and his parents didnt know that he left. he usually tells them when he's leaving or whatever. i finally got a hold of him and he was at his friends house alone, and he never said why. then he got a call and had to hang up with me. it rly sucks that the way i feel for a whole day can depend on whether he calls me or not or whatever.
i feel fat and lazy and ugly. i know ive gained quite a bit of weight since the beginning of the summer. ppl might not be able to tell but i sure as hell know. i know i need to start doing some kind of exercise but i just dont feel motivated and that sucks.
then of course my social life is totally dead now. my 3 closest friends are goooone. i did hear from matt and adam today though so that made me feel a little bit better knowing that they miss me enough to get a hold of me. plus i might be going down to st. rose in a couple of weeks with liz to see them; so that gives me something to look forward to.
college feels a lot like high school, cept i dont know everyone like i did at rch.
the kids are not to my liking yet. theyre either totally quiet and unapproachable or theyre the kid you know was a jackass or bitch in school. so yeah i havent made any friends yet. the only highlight of my days is that i get to see joel everyday b/c we share 2 classes together.
one thing has surprised me though. history is turning out to be my favorite class and english is tending to be the class that i almost dread going to. i thought i was gonna love sociology, but i dont like the professor which translates into me not rly liking soc. my statistics professor has a pocket protector and uses a handkerchief to blow his nose.
all ive rly had so far for assignments is to read, with the exception of stats which involves like twice as much work as my other classes.
i applied and went for an interview at blockbuster the other day. part of me rly wants the job but then another part doesnt. i know i need a job to start saving up money, be able to pay for my own cell phone, and just for normal stuff that i need. what i really dont want to go through is the awkward stage of not knowing what im doing without someone there telling me what to do. plus im not the greatest with computers and if i get the job, im going to be a clerk and will have to work with them everyday, all the time. not to mention the late hours i'll most likely be working, since its a movie store and stays open until like 12 or 1.
and, finally, to top off my sadness cake: today my sisters best friend keri who moved away to arizona surpirsed us all by showing up here out of the blue. aaand then my moms best friend sabrina who moved away to florida a few years ago just moved back and saw my mom for a the first time in a while. so everyone is seeing the ppl they desperately missed today, but me! i know this is selfish but i cant help feeling sry for myself. thats enough for one day.
i feel fat and lazy and ugly. i know ive gained quite a bit of weight since the beginning of the summer. ppl might not be able to tell but i sure as hell know. i know i need to start doing some kind of exercise but i just dont feel motivated and that sucks.
then of course my social life is totally dead now. my 3 closest friends are goooone. i did hear from matt and adam today though so that made me feel a little bit better knowing that they miss me enough to get a hold of me. plus i might be going down to st. rose in a couple of weeks with liz to see them; so that gives me something to look forward to.
college feels a lot like high school, cept i dont know everyone like i did at rch.
the kids are not to my liking yet. theyre either totally quiet and unapproachable or theyre the kid you know was a jackass or bitch in school. so yeah i havent made any friends yet. the only highlight of my days is that i get to see joel everyday b/c we share 2 classes together.
one thing has surprised me though. history is turning out to be my favorite class and english is tending to be the class that i almost dread going to. i thought i was gonna love sociology, but i dont like the professor which translates into me not rly liking soc. my statistics professor has a pocket protector and uses a handkerchief to blow his nose.
all ive rly had so far for assignments is to read, with the exception of stats which involves like twice as much work as my other classes.
i applied and went for an interview at blockbuster the other day. part of me rly wants the job but then another part doesnt. i know i need a job to start saving up money, be able to pay for my own cell phone, and just for normal stuff that i need. what i really dont want to go through is the awkward stage of not knowing what im doing without someone there telling me what to do. plus im not the greatest with computers and if i get the job, im going to be a clerk and will have to work with them everyday, all the time. not to mention the late hours i'll most likely be working, since its a movie store and stays open until like 12 or 1.
and, finally, to top off my sadness cake: today my sisters best friend keri who moved away to arizona surpirsed us all by showing up here out of the blue. aaand then my moms best friend sabrina who moved away to florida a few years ago just moved back and saw my mom for a the first time in a while. so everyone is seeing the ppl they desperately missed today, but me! i know this is selfish but i cant help feeling sry for myself. thats enough for one day.