50 Shades Darker: Chapter 10 and 11
The amount of rage I have for this book knows no bounds. No bounds at all. This might be the two most rage-inducing chapters so far - and that says a lot.
“Captain, eh?” he says dryly. “Well, I am master of this vessel.”
I cock my head to one side. “You are master of my heart, Mr. Grey.”
Maya: So we pick up where we left off, with Ana and Christian post-boat sex and Ana being all "He told me he loved me, so I don't think I could ever leave him no matter what." Which, EW
Ing: Yeah she basically says she would never leave no matter what he did which is just kind of terrible
Maya: LOOK AT YOUR LIFE, LOOK AT YOUR CHOICES
Ing: EXACTLY
Maya: And then they go back to his apartment and Christian loses his shit over her having a basic conversation with Taylor and informs her not to be friendly with the staff. Because talking = flirting obvs
“You’re fond of Taylor,” Christian says, eyeing me with speculation.
“I suppose I am.” His question derails me. He frowns. “I’m not attracted to him, if that’s why you’re frowning. Stop.”
Christian is almost pouting-sulky.
Jeez, he’s such a child sometimes. “I think Taylor looks after you very well. That’s why I like him. He seems kind, reliable and loyal. He has an avuncular appeal to me.”
Ing: God, she was just joking with him. I fucking hate Christian, he's a goddamn tool
Maya: RIGHT. And then she mentions going to work the next day and I can't, I just can't
Ing: Oh god, he's like DON'T GO TO WORK, LEILA IS OUT THERE and she's like... I can take care of myself at work, thanks and he's like NO, NO YOU CAN'T GO and she gets angry. But then they have sex on the pool table anyway cause they always have sex even when he's an idiot and she's angry
Maya: Basically, he's like iIHAVE MONEY AND I WILL TAKE CARE OF YOU BECAUSE YOU DON'T NEED TO WORK and she's like "...but I want to" and he's basically like "BE BAREFOOT IN THE KITCHEN NOW PLS" and ugggggggh
Ing: Basically. And she's like WE'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR 5 WEEKS and I'm like YES. YOU'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR 5 WEEKS. OPEN YOUR EYES
“But Leila-she’s out there,” he pauses. “I don’t want you to go to work.”
What? “That’s ridiculous, Christian. I have to go to work.”
“No, you don’t.”
“I have a new job, which I enjoy. Of course I have to go to work.” What does he mean?
“No, you don’t,” he repeats, emphatically.
“Do you think I am going to stay here twiddling my thumbs while you’re off being Master of the Universe?”
“Frankly . . . yes.”
Oh, Fifty, Fifty, Fifty . . . give me strength.
“Christian, I need to go to work.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yes. I. Do.” I say it slowly as if he’s a child.
He scowls at me. “It’s not safe.”
“Christian . . . I need to work for a living, and I’ll be fine.”
“No, you don’t need to work for a living-and how do you know you’ll be fine?” He’s almost shouting.
What does he mean? He’s going to support me? Oh, this is beyond ridiculous-I’ve known him for what-five weeks?
Maya: She agrees to go to work and not leave the office until he picks her up. But then she's like YAY OKAY WE HAVE SEX NOW
I can’t help my moan as desire twists and turns inside me. And I try, really try, to think about where I should hit the black with the white. I shift slightly to my right, and he follows me. I bend over the table once more. Using every last vestige of inner strength-which has diminished considerably since I know what will happen once I strike the white ball-I take aim and hit the white again. Christian smacks me once more, hard.
Ow! I miss again. “Oh no! ” I groan.
“Once more, baby. And if you miss this time, I’m really going to let you have it.”
Ing: And they have boring spanky sex on the pool table, just to ruin people's kinks just a little bit more. They're like teeeasing each other but IT'S SO UNSEXY. Then she gets dropped off at work and her boss is like *waggles eyebrows* YOU COME WITH ME TO NYC CONFERENCE
Maya: And she's like "Yes, I have never been to NYC! Let me go let Christian know so he's not worried when I don't show up for dinner then!" At which point he FORBIDS HER FROM GOING. CATEGORICALLY. AND WHEN SHE REFUSES TO ACCEPT NO, HE SHUTS DOWN THE COMPANY'S SPENDING FUND SO SHE CAN'T BUY A TICKET
From: Christian Grey
Subject: You Haven’t Seen Shouty Yet.
Date: June 13, 2011 09:35
To: Anastasia Steele
Tell me.
If it’s with the sleazeball you work with, then the answer is no, over my dead body.
Christian Grey
CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc.
My heart sinks. Shit-it’s like he’s my dad.
From: Anastasia Steele
Subject: No YOU haven’t seen shouty yet.
Date: June 13, 2011 09:46
To: Christian Grey
Yes. It is with Jack.
I want to go. It’s an exciting opportunity for me.
And I have never been to New York.
Don’t get your knickers in a twist.
Anastasia Steele
Assistant to Jack Hyde, Commissioning Editor, SIP
From: Christian Grey
Subject: No YOU haven’t seen shouty yet.
Date: June 13, 2011 09:50
To: Anastasia Steele
Anastasia
It’s not my fucking knickers I am worried about.
The answer is NO.
Ing: OMG I WAS RAGING.I WAS RAGING. HE CHANGES COMPANY POLICY. TO MAKE SURE SHE CAN'T GO. THIS IS SOME FUCKING ABUSIVE BEHAVIOUR. NO ONE CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE
“Ana!” Jack shouts, startling me. “Don’t book that flight!”
“Oh, too late. I’ve done it,” I reply as he strides out of his office over to me. He looks mad.“Look, there’s something going on. For some reason, suddenly, all travel and hotel expenses for staff have to be approved by senior management. This has come right from the top. I am going up to see old Roach. Apparently, a moratorium on all spending has just been implemented. I don’t understand it.” Jack pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes.
Most of the blood drains from my face and knots form in my stomach . Fifty!
Maya: I LEGITIMATELY CANNOT UNDERSTAND HOW PEOPLE DON'T SEE THIS AS ABUSIVE. LIKE, I KNOW HE'S NOT HITTING HER, WHICH IS HOW MOST PEOPLE CLASSIFY ABUSE. BUT HE WON'T LET HER TALK TO OTHER PEOPLE. HE WON'T LET HER GO OUTSIDE WITHOUT HIS PERMISSION. HE HAS HER FOLLOWED AND YELLS AT HER FOR GOING TO GET FOOD
From: Christian Grey
Subject: What have you done?
Date: June 13, 2011 10:46
To: Anastasia Steele
I am just protecting what is mine.
The e-mail that you so rashly sent is wiped from the SIP server now, as are my e-mails to you.
Incidentally, I trust you implicitly. It’s him I don’t trust.
Christian Grey
CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc.
Ing: THAT'S A FUCKING ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP AND I WILL NOT - WILL NOT - EVER SAY IT'S SEXY OR WHATEVER. PEOPLE TEND TO FORGET EMOTIONAL ABUSE, THOUGH.
Maya: THEY DO. BUT I JUST HATE THAT PEOPLE ARE CALLING THIS SEXY. IT'S NOT
Ing: AND IT'S NOT JUST THAT HE'S PROTECTIVE OR JEALOUS. PEOPLE CAN BE PROTECTIVE OR JEALOUS WITHOUT ACTING ON IT. BUT HE'S ACTIVELY STOPPING HER FROM LIVING HER LIFE THE WAY SHE WANTS TO. AND THAT'S ABUSE
“You assured me you wouldn’t go out,” Christian interrupts me, his voice cold and hard.My heart sinks for the millionth time this day. Shit. How the hell does he know?
“Jack sent me out for some lunch. I couldn’t say no. Are you having me watched?” My scalp prickles at the notion. No wonder I felt so paranoid-someone was watching me. The thought makes me angry.
“This is why I didn’t want you going back to work,” Christian snaps.
“Christian, please. You’re being”- So Fifty-“so suffocating.”
“Suffocating?” he whispers, surprised.
“Yes. You have to stop this. I’ll talk to you this evening. Unfortunately, I have to work late because I can’t go to New York.”
“Anastasia, I don’t want to suffocate you,” he says quietly, appalled.
Maya: Christian is so much worse than Edward. Like, I'm feeling fond of Edward rn, ngl
Ing: Seriously. Give me Edward 100 times
Maya: In between all the abuse, Ana gets an email from Mrs. Robinson about grabbing lunch and refers to her as a bitch-troll. Like, her hatred is getting OUT OF CONTROL
“You don’t seem to have many friends. Why is that?”
He shrugs and frowns. “I told you, I don’t really have time. I have business associ-ates-though that’s very different from friendships, I suppose. I have my family and that’s it. Apart from Elena.”
I ignore the mention of the bitch-troll. “No male friends your own age that you can go out with and let off steam?”
Ing: OMG I died LOLing. bitch-troll, REALLY?
Maya: BEST EPITHET EVER, RIGHT?
Ing: CLEARLY. Another thing that pissed me off. Ana got rightfully angry at Christian for cutting her off from NYC. and he did it because her boss is a sleaze or whatever. And then she goes to talk to her boss and he's being creepy about her not coming to NYC like he wanted something mooore. and Ana acts almost as if this justifies the shit Christian pulled. AND SHE CALLS HIM OUT ON HOW HE SUFFOCATES HER AND HE GOES ALL SAD AND WOUNDED BIRD ON HER AND SHE'S LIKE AWWW HE'S SAD AND I'M LIKE, FUCK EVERYTHING
“Are you still mad?” he asks.
“I don’t know,” I murmur. He raises my hand and lightly grazes my knuckles with soft butterfly kisses.
“It’s been a shitty day,” he says.
“Yes, it has.” But for the first time since he left for work this morning, I begin to relax.
Just being in his company is a soothing balm, and all the shit from Jack, and the snarky e-mails to and fro, and the nuisance that is Elena fade into the background. It’s just me and my control freak in the back of the car.
Maya: Like, she has flashes of sense, but then she feels lust and IT ALL FALLS TO PIECES. THE FUCK
Ing: IT'S ALL JUST HORRIFYING. ALL OF THESE PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT HOW EMPOWERING THESE BOOKS ARE. Oh yes, having controlling, abusive boyfriends is so empowering. OH BUT HE'S SO NICE WHEN HE'S NICE. Everyone is nice when they're nice. It's when they're not nice that the issues begin, you fucking morons
Maya: Even physical abusers are nice when they're nice. It does not justify what happens when they're mean
Ing: The amount of raging I did over these chapters. You guys should've seen my offline messages to Maya. I thought I was gonna burst
Maya: Oh man, she was losing her shit. It was NOT PRETTY
Ing: I just can't deal with my hatred for this. My seething, burning hatred for this awful, awful book and this fucked up relationship that people romanticise as if it's the best thing since idk... chocolate
The elevator arrives and in we step. Christian glances down at me, his gray eyes unreadable. Oh, he just looks glorious-tousled hair, white shirt, dark suit. And suddenly it’s there, from nowhere, that feeling. Oh my-the longing, the lust, the electricity. If it were visible, it would be an intense blue aura around and between us it’s so strong. His lips part as he gazes at me.
“Do you feel it?” he breathes.
“Yes.”
“Oh, Ana.” He groans and he grabs me, his arms snaking around me, one hand at the nape of my neck, tipping my head back as his lips find mine. My fingers are in his hair and caressing his cheek as he pushes me back against the elevator wall.
Maya: Like, my problem is I'm not sure what people are responding to here. Is it the sex? Is it Christian? Is it the BDSM? Is it the relationship? I think I'm so blinded by hatred and the problems of the book that I just can't physically figure out what people like about it. And none of the mainstream articles are helping. Maybe I need to talk to someone who genuinely enjoyed it and figure out WHY.
Ing: Yeah, seriously. I don't understand. I have a feeling it might be Christian? Which is terrifying. But he's like...rich and coveted by everyone and he picks ANA and is so protective that he can't deal with her talking to everyone else and that thought is nice in fantasy for some people, I guess? it just skeeves me out though
Maya: I think it's their supposed emotional connection. But I just see it as so completely fucked up, I can't even understand how you could read them and find it involving.
Ing: It's not like I haven't read books about fucked up relationships before and even enjoyed some of them. I mean, I like Wuthering Heights just fine (mostly), even though the characters are despicable people and they're messed in the head. but that's the thing: it's never pretended that they're good people or that their relationship is awesome. The whole point is that they're horrible, but still love each other (in destructive ways).
Maya: I'm just tired of this perpetuation that being protective = constant jealousy and seeking to control every aspect of your life. THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS
Ing: Yeah, seriously? He's not just being protective. He's being an abusive asshole who controls every minute detail of her life and sabotages her career because of his own crippling insecurities. I'm afraid for the people who love this
Maya: I'm afraid for the people who love this because they think their relationship is awesome. Newsflash: IT ISN'T