Late Night Contemplation
Disclaimer: Still not mine.
Summary: Albert's thoughts after Freddie's death
Pairings/Characters: Freddie/Albert, Jess
Rating: PG(13)?
Sometimes, he dreams of Freddie. He remembers his face, his hands, identical to his, yet different in subtle ways. His fingers are more agile, his smile upturns at the left side of his mouth. Thousands of images fill his mind. He sees his smile, hears his laugh, tastes his kiss.
He wakes up soaked in sweat with the blankets in a heap on these nights. He paces the floor, counting to ten over and over again. He cannot find rest, so he stays awake. Dark circles are ever present beneath his eyes.
Jess is too young to notice. Silently, he thanks God for this one blessing. She is a child and is satisfied that her father is with her once again.
But some days, he sees puzzlement in her wide, blue eyes.
Once she asks when she will see Uncle Fallon again. It takes every ounce of his strength not to burst into tears. He tells her that she will not see him again, he has gone away. Jess does cry and as he cradles her in his arms and comforts her, he cries too. His half-heart breaks in two.
He has yet to sleep through an entire night. After he has had enough pacing, he goes to his daughter’s room and watches her sleep. Jess is as much his as she is Freddie’s.
He has not realized it is possible to smile and cry at the same time. He smiles because he can see parts of Freddie in her and cries for the same reason.
He is utterly and completely alone. Losing Freddie has allowed Sarah’s death to hit him more fully. After Sarah died, he had Freddie to lean on, to help with Jess. Now he is a single parent in the worst kind of way.
He closes the door to his daughter’s room and makes his way back to his own room. He prepares to lie awake for the remainder of the night, when he hears soft footsteps behind him.
He smiles at his, their, little girl. He helps her into his bed and finally, Albert Borden is able to fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.
Summary: Albert's thoughts after Freddie's death
Pairings/Characters: Freddie/Albert, Jess
Rating: PG(13)?
Sometimes, he dreams of Freddie. He remembers his face, his hands, identical to his, yet different in subtle ways. His fingers are more agile, his smile upturns at the left side of his mouth. Thousands of images fill his mind. He sees his smile, hears his laugh, tastes his kiss.
He wakes up soaked in sweat with the blankets in a heap on these nights. He paces the floor, counting to ten over and over again. He cannot find rest, so he stays awake. Dark circles are ever present beneath his eyes.
Jess is too young to notice. Silently, he thanks God for this one blessing. She is a child and is satisfied that her father is with her once again.
But some days, he sees puzzlement in her wide, blue eyes.
Once she asks when she will see Uncle Fallon again. It takes every ounce of his strength not to burst into tears. He tells her that she will not see him again, he has gone away. Jess does cry and as he cradles her in his arms and comforts her, he cries too. His half-heart breaks in two.
He has yet to sleep through an entire night. After he has had enough pacing, he goes to his daughter’s room and watches her sleep. Jess is as much his as she is Freddie’s.
He has not realized it is possible to smile and cry at the same time. He smiles because he can see parts of Freddie in her and cries for the same reason.
He is utterly and completely alone. Losing Freddie has allowed Sarah’s death to hit him more fully. After Sarah died, he had Freddie to lean on, to help with Jess. Now he is a single parent in the worst kind of way.
He closes the door to his daughter’s room and makes his way back to his own room. He prepares to lie awake for the remainder of the night, when he hears soft footsteps behind him.
He smiles at his, their, little girl. He helps her into his bed and finally, Albert Borden is able to fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.