Rant/Whine
Some days all I can think about is getting the hell out of Erie and moving out to Bethlehem. A chance to start over. Time to get out and break up my routine. Hanging out and maybe even living with someone I love. Finding a job that I really like. Heck, maybe even start to think about settling down, getting married, and starting a family. That’s what I truly want in life. As much as I view the situation involving Sam, this goes for any moving that I do.
Then reality hits.
How does one afford to just pack up and move? I have a full apartment full of furniture. It’s different when I’m just moving around the city. Now, I’m thinking about moving out 5.5 hours away. That involves getting a moving truck. Who would drive said truck? I know I can’t. I have enough trouble with my own car. I know Rick would help, but he certainly won’t drive it. Maybe Sam would, but that would mean getting him here without a car. I’m guessing I would need at least $3000 just to move. Between trying to find an apartment there and paying the security deposit, the pet deposit, and first month’s rent…ouch! Then setting up utilities and such. Finding a job would be key. Sure, I could transfer to the Outback near by. But I would have to wait for the first paycheck. I’m using all my extra money to go on this cruise.
Then I realize I’m not saving like I should be. And that brings a whole other set of issues.
I’m scared. Maybe that is what this whole journal is about. My comfort zone encompasses Erie, Pennsylvania. Get me outside of it, and I get nervous. I had a very nice little nest egg here until I went and bought my damn car and bought furniture for my apartment. Ever since then I can’t get a hold of enough money to live the way I want. I don’t like the idea of debt. Hell, I didn’t have any credit cards until after I graduated from college. Go figure on that one. I hate that I owe someone or some thing money. Yes, I know the debt I have is no where near the amount that Fish or even Sam has. Yet, at the same time all I want to do is be able to go and get food when I want, and I can’t even do that. I can’t even afford the basic groceries that I used to get in college. And we all know how I used to live in college. Milk is a luxury.
Last month I finally caught up on my cable bill, only so this month I didn’t pay the electric bill. Granted I had a damn extra bill thanks to the car insurance, but when will it end? I won’t even touch the subject of how much it takes to fill my car tank. I have two freaking jobs just to be able to live in a decent apartment. Do I have to add a third? No, don’t ask me how I would or could do that. I get paid this week from Housing, and it’s not even enough to pay my rent for the upcoming month.
Alas, this wasn’t the direction that I wanted this entry to go in. Now it’s turned into a whining entry.
Then reality hits.
How does one afford to just pack up and move? I have a full apartment full of furniture. It’s different when I’m just moving around the city. Now, I’m thinking about moving out 5.5 hours away. That involves getting a moving truck. Who would drive said truck? I know I can’t. I have enough trouble with my own car. I know Rick would help, but he certainly won’t drive it. Maybe Sam would, but that would mean getting him here without a car. I’m guessing I would need at least $3000 just to move. Between trying to find an apartment there and paying the security deposit, the pet deposit, and first month’s rent…ouch! Then setting up utilities and such. Finding a job would be key. Sure, I could transfer to the Outback near by. But I would have to wait for the first paycheck. I’m using all my extra money to go on this cruise.
Then I realize I’m not saving like I should be. And that brings a whole other set of issues.
I’m scared. Maybe that is what this whole journal is about. My comfort zone encompasses Erie, Pennsylvania. Get me outside of it, and I get nervous. I had a very nice little nest egg here until I went and bought my damn car and bought furniture for my apartment. Ever since then I can’t get a hold of enough money to live the way I want. I don’t like the idea of debt. Hell, I didn’t have any credit cards until after I graduated from college. Go figure on that one. I hate that I owe someone or some thing money. Yes, I know the debt I have is no where near the amount that Fish or even Sam has. Yet, at the same time all I want to do is be able to go and get food when I want, and I can’t even do that. I can’t even afford the basic groceries that I used to get in college. And we all know how I used to live in college. Milk is a luxury.
Last month I finally caught up on my cable bill, only so this month I didn’t pay the electric bill. Granted I had a damn extra bill thanks to the car insurance, but when will it end? I won’t even touch the subject of how much it takes to fill my car tank. I have two freaking jobs just to be able to live in a decent apartment. Do I have to add a third? No, don’t ask me how I would or could do that. I get paid this week from Housing, and it’s not even enough to pay my rent for the upcoming month.
Alas, this wasn’t the direction that I wanted this entry to go in. Now it’s turned into a whining entry.