Blasphemy...
I absolutely LOVE saying that word. I dunno why.
So, I was actually social this weekend. I went out both nights... in a ROW! Wow... I had a good time. Didn't really meet any friends or whatever... but you know. The computer has become my friend. At least then someone's always on.
I need to find a roomate!!! I really need the extra cash. Plus, it wouldbe nice to have some human contact every once in a while.
Things never happen how I want them or when I want them to. Life.
Chaz, I can tell isn't as interested in me as he was before. We still see each other. But he doesn't have the passion for me anymore. That lustful look he used to get when he looked in my eyes... utterly to die for. I don't think that I intrigue him enough anymore. He's bored already. If he is, then let it be. At least I got a job out of it. And some good lovin'. He's leaving next month anyways. Just don't want it to be akward... and he seems like he might make it akward.
Burning Man... I'm gonna go. It's not a very big thing in Seattle. People are constantly talking about it here. It'll be a journey... a long awaited one.
Everyday I think about coming home. The pros and cons. Everytime I get to the end of the list... the cons of leaving outway the pros. Maybe not mathmatically... but they just do. It seems smarter to stay here than to go back so soon. I've got this job lined up... it's about to be summer... hopefully I'll have a roommate by then. I just want to be happy. And I'm not feeling it here. I wasn't feeling it in Seattle, and that's why I left.
What the fuck am i suppossed to do? I wish there was a straight forward answer to every question I asked. Things have to be so complicated. All the time. Everything.
I watched Oprah today... that's how lonely I was. She is a complete and utter imbosile. Or at least the writers maek her out to be. Ugh... she makes me sick. Brainwashing all these women to think the same way... to judge others for rediculous reasons.
UGH!
I'm out!
So, I was actually social this weekend. I went out both nights... in a ROW! Wow... I had a good time. Didn't really meet any friends or whatever... but you know. The computer has become my friend. At least then someone's always on.
I need to find a roomate!!! I really need the extra cash. Plus, it wouldbe nice to have some human contact every once in a while.
Things never happen how I want them or when I want them to. Life.
Chaz, I can tell isn't as interested in me as he was before. We still see each other. But he doesn't have the passion for me anymore. That lustful look he used to get when he looked in my eyes... utterly to die for. I don't think that I intrigue him enough anymore. He's bored already. If he is, then let it be. At least I got a job out of it. And some good lovin'. He's leaving next month anyways. Just don't want it to be akward... and he seems like he might make it akward.
Burning Man... I'm gonna go. It's not a very big thing in Seattle. People are constantly talking about it here. It'll be a journey... a long awaited one.
Everyday I think about coming home. The pros and cons. Everytime I get to the end of the list... the cons of leaving outway the pros. Maybe not mathmatically... but they just do. It seems smarter to stay here than to go back so soon. I've got this job lined up... it's about to be summer... hopefully I'll have a roommate by then. I just want to be happy. And I'm not feeling it here. I wasn't feeling it in Seattle, and that's why I left.
What the fuck am i suppossed to do? I wish there was a straight forward answer to every question I asked. Things have to be so complicated. All the time. Everything.
I watched Oprah today... that's how lonely I was. She is a complete and utter imbosile. Or at least the writers maek her out to be. Ugh... she makes me sick. Brainwashing all these women to think the same way... to judge others for rediculous reasons.
UGH!
I'm out!