At What Point?
Hello boys and girls, it's uncle Brandon again. It's been awhile since my last post but now that the holidays are over and done with me and my soap box are back and ready to get back to work.
This is going to be one of those grey area dividing subjects where it'll be split down the middle between the people who do this shit, and the people who don't...............let's find out.
At what point does a lie count as a lie? At what point does not telling someone something become hiding it, omission turns to the dark side and becomes Darth Liar......privacy leads to omission, omission leads to hiding, hiding leads to lying, and that my dear friends is where we find ourselves at this very moment.
We as human beings, as individuals in this country have the right to privacy, to that which is ours and ours alone. This is something I feel very grateful to have and I use it often. But there are people roaming around out there who abuse this right, this privilage. I'm talking about the people who will blur the line between privacy and lying, using their right to privacy to cover up the fact that they just fucking lied to you............(clears throat)
If your dating someone, and they ask you how many relationships you've been in prior to them, should you be completely honest with them? Should you tell them only the big ones, leaving out that one armed crackhead you dated in high school, or do you just tell them the ones your not ashamed of?
Is not being proud of it, being ashamed of something you did grounds for lying? Is it alright to not tell your new boy or girl that you fucked your way through two counties because you feel like shit about it and are embaressed to tell them, maybe fearful they might not stick around.........is it alright then?
Would you want them to withold the shit they're ashamed of to you, are you content not knowing?..............Well you must not be content other wise you would not have asked them how many people they've been with.......which is what you asked them, and which is what they lied about....or excuse me, what they OMITTED certain details about. Is it out of line to ask questions such as these to someone you are in the midst of developing feelings for, or are these things we should be entitled to know?
I happen to be of the camp that thinks IF ASKED, you should be honest. If they don't ask how many sexual partners you've been with, they don't care that much, no need for you to bring it up. But if they ask you a question, if you say anything other then "I really don't want to talk about that" or something similar, isn't anything else a lie, like you made something up to get out of giving the answer?
I happen to think so.
Now don't go thinking that old uncle Brandon is on an uber moral, holier then though honesty kick. We all lie, myself included, it's an undeniable fact. So I couldn't in all honesty judge someone else for doing the same shit I'm doing, that's a level of hypocricy I'm not yet ready to delve to. What I think is complete and utter bullshit is when someone lies really really poorly. Don't tell someone something that they could very easily find out is a lie without you even having to do anything. You didn't think through your lie...excuse me, omission very well. That's the part that stings worse then anything, the insult to the intelligence.
This is the point at which you'll usually get the defense of "I didn't tell you because it's none of your business" or "why does it fucking matter?" or "it's my life, I don't have to answer to you" or any other assortment of crap that has nothing to do with the real subject at hand.
Let me ask you all a question: Hypothetical, your dating someone, whether it be for two months, two years, whatever. And whoever your dating has a friend......in this case it would probably need to be a friend of the opposite sex, and this friend has never been mentioned in the list of people your guy or girl gave you when you had the "how many" talk (by how many I mean anything from sexual partners, to relationships) so you go along thinking, ok, they got a friend of the opposite sex, no biggy. Then however long down the line, in whatever way, it's made known to you by someone or something other then your guy or gal that that friend and them used to go out.........like more then just friends. This information is usually revealed in the most non chalant way, like no big deal. Which it really wouldn't be, to anyone other then a possesive jerk or bitch. But what makes it a big deal is that your boy or girl OMITTED that part, which I don't know about the rest of you, would make me wonder why? Why not just say so in the appropriate conversation you had about the subject.?
This is the point at which I believe that omission becomes a lie. That's also usually the point at which the arguement gets started about privacy, not having to tell you every thing about their life, that just because they didn't tell you about the two of them dating doesn't mean blah blah blah white noise white noise..........which is what really pisses me off because all the blah blah white noise is really not the point, although they would argue, quite violently most times, that it is.
So I present this issue to you kiddos in the peanut gallery, is it a lie to leave something out when asked about it? Is a half truth also half lie?
Given that I'm straight (you know who you are, shut up) I've experienced this with only females, but to be fair I'm sure there are at least SOME guys who do this shit too. So feel free to chime in with your opinions on the subject. Is having a dark past full of shit you'd rather forget reason to lie to your guy or girl if they ask about it? And if you leave it out and they find out later through some other forum, are they out of line to be pissed off, hurt, offended by it?
For those of you out there who might read this and get pissy and defensive about it, that most likely means your one of them, think about that for a second.
I'm off
This is going to be one of those grey area dividing subjects where it'll be split down the middle between the people who do this shit, and the people who don't...............let's find out.
At what point does a lie count as a lie? At what point does not telling someone something become hiding it, omission turns to the dark side and becomes Darth Liar......privacy leads to omission, omission leads to hiding, hiding leads to lying, and that my dear friends is where we find ourselves at this very moment.
We as human beings, as individuals in this country have the right to privacy, to that which is ours and ours alone. This is something I feel very grateful to have and I use it often. But there are people roaming around out there who abuse this right, this privilage. I'm talking about the people who will blur the line between privacy and lying, using their right to privacy to cover up the fact that they just fucking lied to you............(clears throat)
If your dating someone, and they ask you how many relationships you've been in prior to them, should you be completely honest with them? Should you tell them only the big ones, leaving out that one armed crackhead you dated in high school, or do you just tell them the ones your not ashamed of?
Is not being proud of it, being ashamed of something you did grounds for lying? Is it alright to not tell your new boy or girl that you fucked your way through two counties because you feel like shit about it and are embaressed to tell them, maybe fearful they might not stick around.........is it alright then?
Would you want them to withold the shit they're ashamed of to you, are you content not knowing?..............Well you must not be content other wise you would not have asked them how many people they've been with.......which is what you asked them, and which is what they lied about....or excuse me, what they OMITTED certain details about. Is it out of line to ask questions such as these to someone you are in the midst of developing feelings for, or are these things we should be entitled to know?
I happen to be of the camp that thinks IF ASKED, you should be honest. If they don't ask how many sexual partners you've been with, they don't care that much, no need for you to bring it up. But if they ask you a question, if you say anything other then "I really don't want to talk about that" or something similar, isn't anything else a lie, like you made something up to get out of giving the answer?
I happen to think so.
Now don't go thinking that old uncle Brandon is on an uber moral, holier then though honesty kick. We all lie, myself included, it's an undeniable fact. So I couldn't in all honesty judge someone else for doing the same shit I'm doing, that's a level of hypocricy I'm not yet ready to delve to. What I think is complete and utter bullshit is when someone lies really really poorly. Don't tell someone something that they could very easily find out is a lie without you even having to do anything. You didn't think through your lie...excuse me, omission very well. That's the part that stings worse then anything, the insult to the intelligence.
This is the point at which you'll usually get the defense of "I didn't tell you because it's none of your business" or "why does it fucking matter?" or "it's my life, I don't have to answer to you" or any other assortment of crap that has nothing to do with the real subject at hand.
Let me ask you all a question: Hypothetical, your dating someone, whether it be for two months, two years, whatever. And whoever your dating has a friend......in this case it would probably need to be a friend of the opposite sex, and this friend has never been mentioned in the list of people your guy or girl gave you when you had the "how many" talk (by how many I mean anything from sexual partners, to relationships) so you go along thinking, ok, they got a friend of the opposite sex, no biggy. Then however long down the line, in whatever way, it's made known to you by someone or something other then your guy or gal that that friend and them used to go out.........like more then just friends. This information is usually revealed in the most non chalant way, like no big deal. Which it really wouldn't be, to anyone other then a possesive jerk or bitch. But what makes it a big deal is that your boy or girl OMITTED that part, which I don't know about the rest of you, would make me wonder why? Why not just say so in the appropriate conversation you had about the subject.?
This is the point at which I believe that omission becomes a lie. That's also usually the point at which the arguement gets started about privacy, not having to tell you every thing about their life, that just because they didn't tell you about the two of them dating doesn't mean blah blah blah white noise white noise..........which is what really pisses me off because all the blah blah white noise is really not the point, although they would argue, quite violently most times, that it is.
So I present this issue to you kiddos in the peanut gallery, is it a lie to leave something out when asked about it? Is a half truth also half lie?
Given that I'm straight (you know who you are, shut up) I've experienced this with only females, but to be fair I'm sure there are at least SOME guys who do this shit too. So feel free to chime in with your opinions on the subject. Is having a dark past full of shit you'd rather forget reason to lie to your guy or girl if they ask about it? And if you leave it out and they find out later through some other forum, are they out of line to be pissed off, hurt, offended by it?
For those of you out there who might read this and get pissy and defensive about it, that most likely means your one of them, think about that for a second.
I'm off