In Control
The past few times I have gone out, I have gotten hit on by very pretty women. One had a wedding ring, which I pointed out after I'd already bought her a drink. She then proceeded to introduce me to her husband, who very creepily said, "Oh, its okay. We do this all the time."
Nope. Not even a little bit.
The second was adorable. We ended up making out, in a crowded bar, at which point she tried to take me home, at which point I pointed out that we were both really, really drunk and it was not a good idea.
And so, I felt like a gentleman. But I can't remember her name, which makes me feel like an asshole.
All of this confused my roommate greatly, who said, "Yeah, we just can't tell with you."
Indeed.
There was a point in time where my sexuality confused me. This is no longer the case. The word bisexual is an unlikable label at best, so I guess going with the word 'fluid' is a much better vocabulary choice. With women I feel like a man, with men I feel like a woman.
Being single is fucking awesome, btw. There are definitely moments of sheer loneliness, coupled with thoughts of missing myself defined as a couple. But overall, the non-monogamous nature that I'd so enjoyed while in my earlier twenties and late teens is creeping back, and its making me realize how little monogamy suits me.
That's not to say that I want to have some weird triangular relationship again, or am sleeping around. Maybe, maybe not. But it is to say that its not in my nature to settle for one person alone.
I am not the marrying kind. Certainly not the mothering kind. Definitely more suited to situational and short-lived love affairs. Which is just fine and dandy.
And dogs. Because I am crazy.
The past few days I have worked. And I've been sick. And its all taking a toll on my body. Lots of pain, with prescription strength ibuprofen and antibiotics. Blah.
In spite of that, I have managed to finish a rentable bedroom. Yes. The walls are painted, the trim all neat and...trim...the flooring done and done. Its a bedroom. A nice bedroom.
And afterwards, I began to paint the rest of the front hallway. I'd painted the walls a few weeks ago, but last night, I painted most of the trim, the doors, the fronts of the stairs, and began to paint the banister. The banister is a pain because of all of the individual spindles, but they are getting there. I did not finish because exhaustion took over.
The hall floor is next. Got the tiles already, just need to lay them down.
That will not happen tonight. Or should not happen tonight, because of the aforementioned exhaustion. What should happen tonight is some Bailey's, some ice cream and my blender.
Nope. Not even a little bit.
The second was adorable. We ended up making out, in a crowded bar, at which point she tried to take me home, at which point I pointed out that we were both really, really drunk and it was not a good idea.
And so, I felt like a gentleman. But I can't remember her name, which makes me feel like an asshole.
All of this confused my roommate greatly, who said, "Yeah, we just can't tell with you."
Indeed.
There was a point in time where my sexuality confused me. This is no longer the case. The word bisexual is an unlikable label at best, so I guess going with the word 'fluid' is a much better vocabulary choice. With women I feel like a man, with men I feel like a woman.
Being single is fucking awesome, btw. There are definitely moments of sheer loneliness, coupled with thoughts of missing myself defined as a couple. But overall, the non-monogamous nature that I'd so enjoyed while in my earlier twenties and late teens is creeping back, and its making me realize how little monogamy suits me.
That's not to say that I want to have some weird triangular relationship again, or am sleeping around. Maybe, maybe not. But it is to say that its not in my nature to settle for one person alone.
I am not the marrying kind. Certainly not the mothering kind. Definitely more suited to situational and short-lived love affairs. Which is just fine and dandy.
And dogs. Because I am crazy.
The past few days I have worked. And I've been sick. And its all taking a toll on my body. Lots of pain, with prescription strength ibuprofen and antibiotics. Blah.
In spite of that, I have managed to finish a rentable bedroom. Yes. The walls are painted, the trim all neat and...trim...the flooring done and done. Its a bedroom. A nice bedroom.
And afterwards, I began to paint the rest of the front hallway. I'd painted the walls a few weeks ago, but last night, I painted most of the trim, the doors, the fronts of the stairs, and began to paint the banister. The banister is a pain because of all of the individual spindles, but they are getting there. I did not finish because exhaustion took over.
The hall floor is next. Got the tiles already, just need to lay them down.
That will not happen tonight. Or should not happen tonight, because of the aforementioned exhaustion. What should happen tonight is some Bailey's, some ice cream and my blender.