Socialising and shagging
In the last few days I have had two people come back to my place for frolics after picking them up in fairly geeky environments. It's not a personal record or anything, but I thought I'd grown out of that. Anyhow, it's been fun.
I made it to the Pembury last Sunday. I'd been meaning to go for ages, but I was so nervous about it. I get so shy about asking people if they want to play a game with me, especially if I am in an environment where games are being played/expected to be played. I worry about social rejection so much. I'm trying to get over that though. Anyway, I was involved in a game rather than having to initiate one, so that was easier; and people were friendly and didn't stare at me when I got anxious. I shall go again, but not this weekend as I will be in Nottingham.
I'm not quite ready for it yet, but I am developing 'Operation Clubbing'. My aim is to make it to a club¹ sometime in the next two months. I'll need to do various psychological preparation, I have a lot of negative feelings to deal with. It boils down to insecurity and a fear of social rejection. Also, I don't quite know the social norms that exist within clubs. I don't want to use alcohol to make myself feel comfortable, because that comes with the risk that I'll make a tit out of myself. Things to do to prepare: talk myself out of insecurity, have some appropriate positive affirmations ready, have an exit strategy, find someone reliable to take me, have some clothes that make me feel confident, do some practice at observing people while not doing much², study self-help books a bit more, ask people for help. I want to do this for personal development and maybe even fun!
¹ Not a sex club though, I'm perfectly comfortable in those kind of establishments
² AKA hanging out
I made it to the Pembury last Sunday. I'd been meaning to go for ages, but I was so nervous about it. I get so shy about asking people if they want to play a game with me, especially if I am in an environment where games are being played/expected to be played. I worry about social rejection so much. I'm trying to get over that though. Anyway, I was involved in a game rather than having to initiate one, so that was easier; and people were friendly and didn't stare at me when I got anxious. I shall go again, but not this weekend as I will be in Nottingham.
I'm not quite ready for it yet, but I am developing 'Operation Clubbing'. My aim is to make it to a club¹ sometime in the next two months. I'll need to do various psychological preparation, I have a lot of negative feelings to deal with. It boils down to insecurity and a fear of social rejection. Also, I don't quite know the social norms that exist within clubs. I don't want to use alcohol to make myself feel comfortable, because that comes with the risk that I'll make a tit out of myself. Things to do to prepare: talk myself out of insecurity, have some appropriate positive affirmations ready, have an exit strategy, find someone reliable to take me, have some clothes that make me feel confident, do some practice at observing people while not doing much², study self-help books a bit more, ask people for help. I want to do this for personal development and maybe even fun!
¹ Not a sex club though, I'm perfectly comfortable in those kind of establishments
² AKA hanging out