Ben is in a pickle...
I have girl troubles, for the first time in donkeys years
One of my exes has been talking to me recently and she came over today, and yeah we were talking and then mucking around and then i sorta kissed her...a few times...but nothing else happened. The thing is though i just have a feeling she is using me coz she is recently single and she seems to do that with me, always check if im still single when she becomes single and yeah. And plus i was the one who broke up with her, she isn't really my type and my friends don't agree with it. And i think my 'feelings' for her, if there are any for her are just there coz...well...she is there and single and is just some sort of thing in my head telling me that that's the best i can do and if i don't take it then i'll be alone forever.
And then there is another girl, who im only getting to know, who i am pretty sure i like, but don't have the courage to tell her or ask her out on a 'date' as such as i have such a morbid fear of rejection as i am so damn used to it. And also the fact that she is going through a lot of shit and i dont want it to seem like i am using her problems to get close to her or anything coz that's not what i'm doing, i feel i genuinly like her and yeah, i don't know. And, she is the typical girl i fall for, the girl who is smart, attractive, popular and WAY outta my league, and by telling her or asking her out to do something and being rejected, it would then make things weird, and she is the sorta person who if i couldn't be in a relationship with still remain good friends, and i feel that would ruin things. Also, i have heard the 'i dont want to ruin the friendship' excuse too many times and hearing that one more time may send me over an edge i don't want to go back over...
I realise it was wrong for me to kiss my ex if i don't have any feelings for her (not that i know if i do or not) and i also realise it's chicken for me not to tell the girl my feelings or ask her out somewhere, but i just don't know what to do!
One of my exes has been talking to me recently and she came over today, and yeah we were talking and then mucking around and then i sorta kissed her...a few times...but nothing else happened. The thing is though i just have a feeling she is using me coz she is recently single and she seems to do that with me, always check if im still single when she becomes single and yeah. And plus i was the one who broke up with her, she isn't really my type and my friends don't agree with it. And i think my 'feelings' for her, if there are any for her are just there coz...well...she is there and single and is just some sort of thing in my head telling me that that's the best i can do and if i don't take it then i'll be alone forever.
And then there is another girl, who im only getting to know, who i am pretty sure i like, but don't have the courage to tell her or ask her out on a 'date' as such as i have such a morbid fear of rejection as i am so damn used to it. And also the fact that she is going through a lot of shit and i dont want it to seem like i am using her problems to get close to her or anything coz that's not what i'm doing, i feel i genuinly like her and yeah, i don't know. And, she is the typical girl i fall for, the girl who is smart, attractive, popular and WAY outta my league, and by telling her or asking her out to do something and being rejected, it would then make things weird, and she is the sorta person who if i couldn't be in a relationship with still remain good friends, and i feel that would ruin things. Also, i have heard the 'i dont want to ruin the friendship' excuse too many times and hearing that one more time may send me over an edge i don't want to go back over...
I realise it was wrong for me to kiss my ex if i don't have any feelings for her (not that i know if i do or not) and i also realise it's chicken for me not to tell the girl my feelings or ask her out somewhere, but i just don't know what to do!