If I was a flower growing wild a free, all I'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee
I swear to God if my mother comes into my room one more time to bad mouth my father I will scream. I get he's the devil, and he's done terrible things. But he's my father. I worshipped him for most of my life. We were best friends for most of my life. It's not cool for you to come in here and cry about him. It wouldn't be so bad if you just cried, actually. It's the abuse you pour out about him. It's so fucking unfair that I get looked at in disgust if I don't join in with the insulting.
I mean, Jesus. I hate him too! I hate what he's done to me, and to our family. But I cannot just sit there and call him names. I can't do it. I love him so much more than I probably should considering what he's done. I could never admit to my mother or brother how much I still love him. They don't understand that he's still my fucking father. I won't ever not love him. It's in my blood, this innate affection.
I don't know what to fucking do anymore.
I mean, Jesus. I hate him too! I hate what he's done to me, and to our family. But I cannot just sit there and call him names. I can't do it. I love him so much more than I probably should considering what he's done. I could never admit to my mother or brother how much I still love him. They don't understand that he's still my fucking father. I won't ever not love him. It's in my blood, this innate affection.
I don't know what to fucking do anymore.