muses_w_remotes | 8.11. La Femme Nikita
8.11. "There's been entirely too much externalizing of emotion lately."
| La Femme Nikita
Co-written with paramedically
[Follows THIS and THIS]
Luke managed to look about 30% sheepish when Andrew answered the door of his apartment and found his cousin standing there. Luke shrugged a little, hands planted firmly in his pockets. “Surprise?” he offered, although not particularly apologetically. He didn’t miss Andrew’s appearance, though. Unshaven, still in pyjamas at two in the afternoon, looking very much like he had either just woken up or had been crying. Luke didn’t feel an iota of guilt for crashing Andrew’s place when he had specifically requested to be left alone.
“Jesus,” Andrew mumbled and turned away to go back into the apartment. He left the door open, however. He didn’t really have enough energy to debate the situation. He flopped down onto the sofa, put his feet up on the coffee table and proceeded to stare blankly at his toes.
Luke nudged the door closed behind him and then took the armchair a few paces away. “Am I going to have to resort to Chinese water torture to get this out of you? You had me worried…”
Andrew threw him a mere glance and went back to looking at his feet. “Worried that I’d be trying to drown in the bottom of a bottle again?” he murmured and then shook his head. “I learnt my lesson with that.”
“I wouldn’t blame you if you were,” Luke admitted. “I just didn’t want to find your unconscious paraletic arse wasted on the bathroom floor again. I’ve got two mates in hospital already. I don’t need another one.”
“How are they? Your mates?” Andrew asked, folding his arms protectively across his chest.
Luke frowned a little in concern. “Don’t change the subject, mate,” he pleaded softly. He leaned forward so he could try to meet his cousin’s gaze. “Can I trust you to be on your own?”
There was moment of hesitation, but it was reactionary. “Yeah, you can. I haven’t had a drink in eight months. I am capable of being depressed without writing myself off these days,” Andrew mumbled and then sighed. “I’ll be alright in a few days. Can’t a guy wallow in peace? Alone.”
“You said it wasn’t to do with your Dad,” Luke pointed out. “What’s happened? Isn’t it better to talk about it?”
“Not with you,” Andrew returned and met Luke’s eyes.
Luke’s frown deepened. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t want to be repeatedly bashed with ‘I told you so’s’, alright?” Andrew snapped with a dismissive wave of his hand. “You were right. Woo-fucking-hoo.”
Luke’s stomach flipped a little at this. “The woman with the kid,” he guessed. “What has she fucking done to you?”
Andrew shot Luke a furious glare. “Nothing! She didn’t do anything! I can’t believe you. She’s a single mother going through a fucking arsehole of a time and you automatically think she’s going to sully poor naïve and idiotic Andy who can’t get a date to fucking save himself! Well, I fucked up again, okay? You were right. Now you can go back to your girlfriend and be merry in your wonderful relationship. I’m staying here - alone - with my bottle of chocolate sauce and a very large spoon. So piss off and leave me to it. I have a date with Dr Phil. He’s going to tell me how to manage a career and children without cheating on my wife.”
Luke was politely silent for all of twenty seconds. “You asked her out.”
Andrew scowled and the rubbed his hands over his face. “That probably would have been the logical first step. Then she could’ve told me to fuck off without being forced into something she didn’t want.”
Luke blinked, not making any sense of it. “What then?”
“I kissed her,” Andrew said in a tiny voice. “And I liked it.”
“Fuck, mate…” Luke mumbled, brushing his hand over his mouth helplessly. “What happened?”
Andrew drew a breath and let it out slowly. “She kissed back at first,” he admitted but his shoulders slumped. “Then pushed me away and freaked out. She didn’t want it, demanded to know what I was doing and then told me to forget we ever met before slamming the door in my face. I told you I fucked up. Royally. And hurt her in the process. I never meant to hurt her, I wanted to help her.”
Luke wet his lips as he watched his cousin closely. “Well, you obviously wanted to kiss her and she obviously wanted to kiss you back…” he began.
“It just happened,” Andrew corrected. “They do say shit happens. Look, I know you just want to help, but there is no rationalising it. I fucked up. I should never have taken advantage of her, especially not at the point in her life she is at right now. I should never have done anything beyond deliver her safely to the labour ward.”
“Sometimes you do just need to take risks, mate,” Luke told him quietly. “You like her.”
Andrew kept his gaze averted. “What does it fucking matter? I’m never going to see her again. I’m writing this whole last week off as one huge, stupid and idiotic error of judgement.”
“But she kissed back,” Luke had to emphasise.
“Then she made a huge mistake too,” was all Andrew said and fell into a dull silence.
Ali Sullivan [agentsullivan] referenced with permission
Word Count | 884
| La Femme Nikita
Co-written with paramedically
[Follows THIS and THIS]
Luke managed to look about 30% sheepish when Andrew answered the door of his apartment and found his cousin standing there. Luke shrugged a little, hands planted firmly in his pockets. “Surprise?” he offered, although not particularly apologetically. He didn’t miss Andrew’s appearance, though. Unshaven, still in pyjamas at two in the afternoon, looking very much like he had either just woken up or had been crying. Luke didn’t feel an iota of guilt for crashing Andrew’s place when he had specifically requested to be left alone.
“Jesus,” Andrew mumbled and turned away to go back into the apartment. He left the door open, however. He didn’t really have enough energy to debate the situation. He flopped down onto the sofa, put his feet up on the coffee table and proceeded to stare blankly at his toes.
Luke nudged the door closed behind him and then took the armchair a few paces away. “Am I going to have to resort to Chinese water torture to get this out of you? You had me worried…”
Andrew threw him a mere glance and went back to looking at his feet. “Worried that I’d be trying to drown in the bottom of a bottle again?” he murmured and then shook his head. “I learnt my lesson with that.”
“I wouldn’t blame you if you were,” Luke admitted. “I just didn’t want to find your unconscious paraletic arse wasted on the bathroom floor again. I’ve got two mates in hospital already. I don’t need another one.”
“How are they? Your mates?” Andrew asked, folding his arms protectively across his chest.
Luke frowned a little in concern. “Don’t change the subject, mate,” he pleaded softly. He leaned forward so he could try to meet his cousin’s gaze. “Can I trust you to be on your own?”
There was moment of hesitation, but it was reactionary. “Yeah, you can. I haven’t had a drink in eight months. I am capable of being depressed without writing myself off these days,” Andrew mumbled and then sighed. “I’ll be alright in a few days. Can’t a guy wallow in peace? Alone.”
“You said it wasn’t to do with your Dad,” Luke pointed out. “What’s happened? Isn’t it better to talk about it?”
“Not with you,” Andrew returned and met Luke’s eyes.
Luke’s frown deepened. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t want to be repeatedly bashed with ‘I told you so’s’, alright?” Andrew snapped with a dismissive wave of his hand. “You were right. Woo-fucking-hoo.”
Luke’s stomach flipped a little at this. “The woman with the kid,” he guessed. “What has she fucking done to you?”
Andrew shot Luke a furious glare. “Nothing! She didn’t do anything! I can’t believe you. She’s a single mother going through a fucking arsehole of a time and you automatically think she’s going to sully poor naïve and idiotic Andy who can’t get a date to fucking save himself! Well, I fucked up again, okay? You were right. Now you can go back to your girlfriend and be merry in your wonderful relationship. I’m staying here - alone - with my bottle of chocolate sauce and a very large spoon. So piss off and leave me to it. I have a date with Dr Phil. He’s going to tell me how to manage a career and children without cheating on my wife.”
Luke was politely silent for all of twenty seconds. “You asked her out.”
Andrew scowled and the rubbed his hands over his face. “That probably would have been the logical first step. Then she could’ve told me to fuck off without being forced into something she didn’t want.”
Luke blinked, not making any sense of it. “What then?”
“I kissed her,” Andrew said in a tiny voice. “And I liked it.”
“Fuck, mate…” Luke mumbled, brushing his hand over his mouth helplessly. “What happened?”
Andrew drew a breath and let it out slowly. “She kissed back at first,” he admitted but his shoulders slumped. “Then pushed me away and freaked out. She didn’t want it, demanded to know what I was doing and then told me to forget we ever met before slamming the door in my face. I told you I fucked up. Royally. And hurt her in the process. I never meant to hurt her, I wanted to help her.”
Luke wet his lips as he watched his cousin closely. “Well, you obviously wanted to kiss her and she obviously wanted to kiss you back…” he began.
“It just happened,” Andrew corrected. “They do say shit happens. Look, I know you just want to help, but there is no rationalising it. I fucked up. I should never have taken advantage of her, especially not at the point in her life she is at right now. I should never have done anything beyond deliver her safely to the labour ward.”
“Sometimes you do just need to take risks, mate,” Luke told him quietly. “You like her.”
Andrew kept his gaze averted. “What does it fucking matter? I’m never going to see her again. I’m writing this whole last week off as one huge, stupid and idiotic error of judgement.”
“But she kissed back,” Luke had to emphasise.
“Then she made a huge mistake too,” was all Andrew said and fell into a dull silence.
Ali Sullivan [agentsullivan] referenced with permission
Word Count | 884