[True_writers prompt: 1. What are the three “nevers” in your life?]
OOC: Sam is from an AU!verse in which he's living with Kara Thrace and Leoben Conoy.
1. What are the three “nevers” in your life?
1. Never ask me if I've slept with Leoben.
I don't care if we're both living with the same woman. I don't care much that he's frakking my wife. I don't care if we're both in the same room when it happens, okay? I'm not sleeping with him. And I don't plan on it. I'm going to forget that thing Kara said when she was drunk the other night involving he and I and showers, and if Leoben doesn't stop smirking at me, I'm going to punch him in the face when Kara's not home.
And look, before you think I'm being some kind of jerk, it's not because Leoben's a guy--though that's not really my thing, I admit it. It's because he's Leoben. If you don't know what I mean, go talk to him for two minutes. You'll understand.
2. Never call my wife any.kind.of.name.
I don't care if you don't like what she's doing. It's her life. I don't like it either, most of the time. I love Kara. That's all that matters.
Besides, if you do call her names, she'll probably hit you. She hits hard, believe me.
3. For the love of Gods, don't ask me about being a Cylon.
Look, I don't know why I'm a Cylon, I don't understand it, I don't even know if I was born or what. I don't have copies. I'm just me. And I was a gods-damned good Pyramid player, and no, it wasn't because I'm a Cylon. I didn't even know that until recently, anyway.
Besides, I don't really have any super-Cylon-powers. Not that I know of, anyway. And if you think you have some suggestions for finding them, then frak you. I don't want to hear it.
1. What are the three “nevers” in your life?
1. Never ask me if I've slept with Leoben.
I don't care if we're both living with the same woman. I don't care much that he's frakking my wife. I don't care if we're both in the same room when it happens, okay? I'm not sleeping with him. And I don't plan on it. I'm going to forget that thing Kara said when she was drunk the other night involving he and I and showers, and if Leoben doesn't stop smirking at me, I'm going to punch him in the face when Kara's not home.
And look, before you think I'm being some kind of jerk, it's not because Leoben's a guy--though that's not really my thing, I admit it. It's because he's Leoben. If you don't know what I mean, go talk to him for two minutes. You'll understand.
2. Never call my wife any.kind.of.name.
I don't care if you don't like what she's doing. It's her life. I don't like it either, most of the time. I love Kara. That's all that matters.
Besides, if you do call her names, she'll probably hit you. She hits hard, believe me.
3. For the love of Gods, don't ask me about being a Cylon.
Look, I don't know why I'm a Cylon, I don't understand it, I don't even know if I was born or what. I don't have copies. I'm just me. And I was a gods-damned good Pyramid player, and no, it wasn't because I'm a Cylon. I didn't even know that until recently, anyway.
Besides, I don't really have any super-Cylon-powers. Not that I know of, anyway. And if you think you have some suggestions for finding them, then frak you. I don't want to hear it.