(no subject)
Today is a new day, granted with new days comes new events and the same routine. Yesterday was nothing exciting, although, without knowing it I did see an old friend. Have you ever been so sure that you know someone but, at that moment are not sure from where or how you met? This happens to me a lot, except this time it was a little unexpected. After the realization, I was left feeling confused. I felt at peace yet, wondered if I would have realized who it was, would have felt the same ease. I’m torn between feeling relief and regret. Could I have made myself feel less inferior? Or would I have simply felt uncomfortable and be filled with the same pain I once felt when everything fell apart?
What makes a relationship significant and what makes it insignificant? If a relationship is significant to me, then to be considered significant would the other party have to feel the same way? Or can a relationship be significant to one but, insignificant to the other? Either way, this particular relationship was significant to me. It may not have been long-lasting but none the less all the feelings were there…at least for me.
A part of me wished I would have realized who it was. This way I could have had my chance at revenge, and the other was glad. I’m not sure how I would have felt after seeing him. In truth, I’m not actually sure whether I am completely over what happened, or if I am completely over him. I was so sure that I loved him…
Love is a strong word I know.
I feel like screaming to the world what happened, maybe this way I will feel a bit more at ease. I am not upset, and to be honest I’m not sure how to describe how I am feeling at
this moment. All I am sure of is that he was there, it was real, and so were we.
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New thought,
Am I ready to move on? Am I ready to start a new relationship, and am I ready to put myself out there? I’m unsure of all of these answers. However, I am sure that I would never look back on what has happened and regret what I did, and wish to do it over. I know I made some mistakes, and yes I am scared of making the same mistakes over, but I don’t want fear to control me anymore.
Am I scared of what other people will think? Or am I just scared of my own feelings…knowing that they are growing, and can disappear or evolve as fast as I was hit with them? Again…I’m unsure of the answers.
I’m unsure of a lot of things…