(no subject)
I just had a "bad" dream.
I had a dream that I went back in time to the beginning of my senior year of college and just gave myself a "Whoa holy shit dude. Let me tell you what happens to YOU in the next 2 and a half years!" The whole "Your mom ends up in the hospital and a nursing home for months and months and you have no career opportunities and you are making more money right now than you are 3 years from now and oh yeah, Stacey doesn't actually love you and ends up leaving you for another guy after 3 years and you live with your dad and you get swindled buying your first car and you have to give up Kaiba to a humane society" which is so not to mention all the little things that happen like losing a $700 check and my car accident and the fact that SEATTLE loses a SUPERBOWL to the STEELERS and what not. I was remembering every single little thing I ever said wrong and or didn't think through, too. I'm HARSH to my dream self.
It dawns on me that I can not actually remember any single point in my life where I did not have some major regret about something. Man, if I could go to myself on my 18th birthday? The things I could tell me. "Don't ever visit Punchline's message board!" Heh.
And when I woke up, the first thing I thought of is..."God. What could possibly happen to me in the next two and a half years that I'd want to come back and tell me from then!"
Positive thinking is something of a weakness of mine. :)
Weird dream, though. Like I said...I am a very regretful person. I've been pondering exactly what my opinion of my relationship with Stacey is. And my ability to be forward-thinking these days is...obscured.
Who knows what regrets tomorrow will bring?
Also, I have decided I wish I had a therapist. Not because I'm crazy, but because I wish I had someone I could download to. I could really use someone I could talk to unabashedly without having any social contact with.
I had a dream that I went back in time to the beginning of my senior year of college and just gave myself a "Whoa holy shit dude. Let me tell you what happens to YOU in the next 2 and a half years!" The whole "Your mom ends up in the hospital and a nursing home for months and months and you have no career opportunities and you are making more money right now than you are 3 years from now and oh yeah, Stacey doesn't actually love you and ends up leaving you for another guy after 3 years and you live with your dad and you get swindled buying your first car and you have to give up Kaiba to a humane society" which is so not to mention all the little things that happen like losing a $700 check and my car accident and the fact that SEATTLE loses a SUPERBOWL to the STEELERS and what not. I was remembering every single little thing I ever said wrong and or didn't think through, too. I'm HARSH to my dream self.
It dawns on me that I can not actually remember any single point in my life where I did not have some major regret about something. Man, if I could go to myself on my 18th birthday? The things I could tell me. "Don't ever visit Punchline's message board!" Heh.
And when I woke up, the first thing I thought of is..."God. What could possibly happen to me in the next two and a half years that I'd want to come back and tell me from then!"
Positive thinking is something of a weakness of mine. :)
Weird dream, though. Like I said...I am a very regretful person. I've been pondering exactly what my opinion of my relationship with Stacey is. And my ability to be forward-thinking these days is...obscured.
Who knows what regrets tomorrow will bring?
Also, I have decided I wish I had a therapist. Not because I'm crazy, but because I wish I had someone I could download to. I could really use someone I could talk to unabashedly without having any social contact with.