[G3] Not Like Other Boys
Title: Not Like Other Boys
Series: Gokusen 3
Pairing: Kazayama (Ren/Yamato)
Rating: G
Genre: Angst, romance
Word count: 1,261
Disclaimer: Not mine, damnit.
Summary: Yamato muses on his lack of interest in girls, his upcoming graduation...and Ren.
Not Like Other Boys
It isn't until he's in his final year of high school that Ogata Yamato has his suspicions confirmed.
He's not like other boys.
Except that he is, in all the ways that count. He puts his pants on one leg at a time, takes an inordinate amount of time to do his hair in the mornings, cuts class when he feels like it and doesn't run scared from a fight. His friends are the same, though he suspects Kamiya might actually take longer over his hair.
What sets Yamato apart from the rest is how he feels about girls. Or rather, how he doesn't feel about girls. They're just...there. Sure, they might be pretty to look at, and even fun to spend time with, but Yamato just can't bring himself to get excited at the thought. When group dates are arranged and the rest of 3-D go crazy with elation, he slouches over his desk and wonders what the big deal is.
Maybe it's because they don't spend a lot of time with females other than family members and teachers, and there's nothing worth making a fuss over there. To hear the others talk, sometimes, one would think attending an all-boys school was tantamount to being stuck at sea - adrift in an ocean of masculinity without hope of being saved by a warm, soft lifeboat with curves in all the right places.
He's pretty sure that's how Ren views the situation, but Ren's primary female influence is his brash, outspoken older sister, with whom he has a surprising amount in common, and his thoughts on girls are naturally skewed as a result. Ren likes girls, and Yamato knows this because he's always one of the first to volunteer himself for group dates, because he gets so hyper whenever the subject of girls is even mentioned. That makes everyone else fired up too - when Ren throws himself into something, everyone else wants in on it too. It's part of what makes it so easy for him to be a leader.
Yamato doesn't think they're in competition anymore. He does things his way and Ren does things Ren's way and a lot of the time, they seem to be going in the same direction, so they go together. They weren't friends before, but they are now and they're happier for it. A gang of six is warmer than a gang of three - more fun to be had, more people to watch your back in a fight, more people talking and laughing and taking your mind off your problems.
Family is a big problem for Yamato, and it's not one he can talk about. His stern, teacher father who blames him for everything, the perfect brother he's not even supposed to dream of being as good as, and his kind, worried mother who loves them all and desperately tries to keep them together. There's a divorce coming, Yamato's sure of it, and he knows his father wouldn't even contemplate asking for custody.
That's just fine. If they never see each other again, that's fine too. Yamato doesn't see the point in wasting time with people who hate him, who think he's useless trash. It's why he used to skip school so much. If it wasn't for Yankumi, he'd probably still be doing it.
Not that she can take all the credit for it. Yamato comes to school because it's fun, because he gets to spend all day with his friends.
Because he can watch the way Kazama Ren's cool smirk becomes a manic grin, how he drops his sullen, I-can-do-just-fine-by-myself facade in favour of animated, exhilarated, boundless energy, not caring if he looks dorky or even demented because he's too wrapped up in the moment.
Yamato likes watching that - likes watching Ren, deliberately eyecatching with his hair and clothing choices, clearly wanting people to watch him, to take notice. No one can help noticing Ren. He's too tall, too bright.
Too much.
In comparison, Yamato sometimes feels like he's been left in the shade, walking in Ren's shadow. He's not as loud, not as overt, and when people meet them for the first time, it's Ren they remember.
Yamato can understand that; he thinks he's got Ren's face memorised, imprinted on his brain, waiting behind his eyes for him to fall asleep and dream in red and blond and purple. Fresh, purple bruises and blond streaks dyed red by blood - there has always been violence in their dealings with each other, but now they're fighting on the same side.
It's taken them this long to get here. Graduation is mere months away, and no one knows what will happen after that. They know they'll make it there together, though. All of them.
Then they'll start their separate lives, and even if they still see each other, it won't be the same. They won't be together everyday anymore.
Yamato will miss seeing Ren's smile - even more so when sometimes, he's the one who puts it there. He looks too long, then. It can't be normal, he's sure, this business of always watching, then turning away when he might get caught. That's how Yamato knows he's not like other boys - the other boys *he* knows, anyway - because it's crazy to agree to go on a group date with girls you don't really want to meet just so you can watch your friend attempt to be charming and fail in ways that you consider...adorable?
It makes him feel weird just thinking about why he does this, so by and large, he tries not to. (Thinking is not the strong point of anyone in 3-D, though they manage well enough on instinct.) It's his own little secret, something to be treasured and kept close to his chest. Yamato's friends are used to him being less than enthusiastic on the subject of girls, and they're okay with that - it means less competition. He's not sure they're ready to hear that he - might, just possibly - like Ren.
He's not sure he's ready to hear it either, and Ren certainly isn't. Right now, he's standing behind Yamato's chair, fist in the air, reciting the rules for group dates like they're holy commandments. Yamato hasn't been paying attention, so he's not even sure where they're going, who they're meeting, what their cover story is this time. It doesn't matter, really. Ren's got it all under control. Yamato'll just show up when he's supposed to, say nice things to nice girls, and wait for the inevitable gang of thugs to show up and ruin the whole night.
That part, he can actually look forward to. Not the fight, but afterwards, when the six of them are walking home, full of adrenaline and smiling despite the bruises, when Ren will walk next to him, their jacket sleeves brushing in the dark.
Ren's next to him now, one hand propped on his desk, and Yamato blinks in surprise.
"You're coming too, right?" Ren says.
Yamato flicks his hair back over his shoulder, plays it casual like he's heard every word and he knows exactly what he's agreeing to. "Of course. Should be fun."
The grin he receives in reply makes it worth the waste of an evening. Ren's mouth is wide and his eyes are sparkling, and he's looking at Yamato like Yamato's just given him the best birthday present ever.
Yamato thinks that if other boys don't enjoy being looked at like that, then he doesn't want to be like other boys.
Series: Gokusen 3
Pairing: Kazayama (Ren/Yamato)
Rating: G
Genre: Angst, romance
Word count: 1,261
Disclaimer: Not mine, damnit.
Summary: Yamato muses on his lack of interest in girls, his upcoming graduation...and Ren.
Not Like Other Boys
It isn't until he's in his final year of high school that Ogata Yamato has his suspicions confirmed.
He's not like other boys.
Except that he is, in all the ways that count. He puts his pants on one leg at a time, takes an inordinate amount of time to do his hair in the mornings, cuts class when he feels like it and doesn't run scared from a fight. His friends are the same, though he suspects Kamiya might actually take longer over his hair.
What sets Yamato apart from the rest is how he feels about girls. Or rather, how he doesn't feel about girls. They're just...there. Sure, they might be pretty to look at, and even fun to spend time with, but Yamato just can't bring himself to get excited at the thought. When group dates are arranged and the rest of 3-D go crazy with elation, he slouches over his desk and wonders what the big deal is.
Maybe it's because they don't spend a lot of time with females other than family members and teachers, and there's nothing worth making a fuss over there. To hear the others talk, sometimes, one would think attending an all-boys school was tantamount to being stuck at sea - adrift in an ocean of masculinity without hope of being saved by a warm, soft lifeboat with curves in all the right places.
He's pretty sure that's how Ren views the situation, but Ren's primary female influence is his brash, outspoken older sister, with whom he has a surprising amount in common, and his thoughts on girls are naturally skewed as a result. Ren likes girls, and Yamato knows this because he's always one of the first to volunteer himself for group dates, because he gets so hyper whenever the subject of girls is even mentioned. That makes everyone else fired up too - when Ren throws himself into something, everyone else wants in on it too. It's part of what makes it so easy for him to be a leader.
Yamato doesn't think they're in competition anymore. He does things his way and Ren does things Ren's way and a lot of the time, they seem to be going in the same direction, so they go together. They weren't friends before, but they are now and they're happier for it. A gang of six is warmer than a gang of three - more fun to be had, more people to watch your back in a fight, more people talking and laughing and taking your mind off your problems.
Family is a big problem for Yamato, and it's not one he can talk about. His stern, teacher father who blames him for everything, the perfect brother he's not even supposed to dream of being as good as, and his kind, worried mother who loves them all and desperately tries to keep them together. There's a divorce coming, Yamato's sure of it, and he knows his father wouldn't even contemplate asking for custody.
That's just fine. If they never see each other again, that's fine too. Yamato doesn't see the point in wasting time with people who hate him, who think he's useless trash. It's why he used to skip school so much. If it wasn't for Yankumi, he'd probably still be doing it.
Not that she can take all the credit for it. Yamato comes to school because it's fun, because he gets to spend all day with his friends.
Because he can watch the way Kazama Ren's cool smirk becomes a manic grin, how he drops his sullen, I-can-do-just-fine-by-myself facade in favour of animated, exhilarated, boundless energy, not caring if he looks dorky or even demented because he's too wrapped up in the moment.
Yamato likes watching that - likes watching Ren, deliberately eyecatching with his hair and clothing choices, clearly wanting people to watch him, to take notice. No one can help noticing Ren. He's too tall, too bright.
Too much.
In comparison, Yamato sometimes feels like he's been left in the shade, walking in Ren's shadow. He's not as loud, not as overt, and when people meet them for the first time, it's Ren they remember.
Yamato can understand that; he thinks he's got Ren's face memorised, imprinted on his brain, waiting behind his eyes for him to fall asleep and dream in red and blond and purple. Fresh, purple bruises and blond streaks dyed red by blood - there has always been violence in their dealings with each other, but now they're fighting on the same side.
It's taken them this long to get here. Graduation is mere months away, and no one knows what will happen after that. They know they'll make it there together, though. All of them.
Then they'll start their separate lives, and even if they still see each other, it won't be the same. They won't be together everyday anymore.
Yamato will miss seeing Ren's smile - even more so when sometimes, he's the one who puts it there. He looks too long, then. It can't be normal, he's sure, this business of always watching, then turning away when he might get caught. That's how Yamato knows he's not like other boys - the other boys *he* knows, anyway - because it's crazy to agree to go on a group date with girls you don't really want to meet just so you can watch your friend attempt to be charming and fail in ways that you consider...adorable?
It makes him feel weird just thinking about why he does this, so by and large, he tries not to. (Thinking is not the strong point of anyone in 3-D, though they manage well enough on instinct.) It's his own little secret, something to be treasured and kept close to his chest. Yamato's friends are used to him being less than enthusiastic on the subject of girls, and they're okay with that - it means less competition. He's not sure they're ready to hear that he - might, just possibly - like Ren.
He's not sure he's ready to hear it either, and Ren certainly isn't. Right now, he's standing behind Yamato's chair, fist in the air, reciting the rules for group dates like they're holy commandments. Yamato hasn't been paying attention, so he's not even sure where they're going, who they're meeting, what their cover story is this time. It doesn't matter, really. Ren's got it all under control. Yamato'll just show up when he's supposed to, say nice things to nice girls, and wait for the inevitable gang of thugs to show up and ruin the whole night.
That part, he can actually look forward to. Not the fight, but afterwards, when the six of them are walking home, full of adrenaline and smiling despite the bruises, when Ren will walk next to him, their jacket sleeves brushing in the dark.
Ren's next to him now, one hand propped on his desk, and Yamato blinks in surprise.
"You're coming too, right?" Ren says.
Yamato flicks his hair back over his shoulder, plays it casual like he's heard every word and he knows exactly what he's agreeing to. "Of course. Should be fun."
The grin he receives in reply makes it worth the waste of an evening. Ren's mouth is wide and his eyes are sparkling, and he's looking at Yamato like Yamato's just given him the best birthday present ever.
Yamato thinks that if other boys don't enjoy being looked at like that, then he doesn't want to be like other boys.