(no subject)
do you know what it feels like to be defeated and keep trying anyway? every time he says something mean i just think about this baby and how i don't want her to end up like me. i want her to have the chance to know her father like i didn't. or to have a mother who is always there like he didn't. i wanted to change the outcome for her. but its just looking like if i stay we will be broke and unhappy and hateful for our entire lives. i don't want her to see that. i don't want to blame her for me going through that. i'm stuck between a rock and a hard place and i don't know how to get out. is it too late for us? i do love him. but i just think i put up with more than i should have to. i don't want to be alone. but i don't want to be unhappy anymore. when she gets here if things don't change i know what my only choice is. i just hope i don't have to make it...