Infinite Playlists
I started crying at school today. I started crying at work today. I started crying at home today.
Diet (times are approximate)
1. 9:00 AM: one peanut butter and jelly sandwich (blood drive)
2. 11:00 AM: 1/6 of a granola bar (peanut butter flavored, from Robert Hudson)
3. 11:45 AM: two chocolate chip cookies (from Michael Green)
4. 12:30 PM: four twizzlers
5. 5:00 PM: one turkey sandwich on pumpernickel bread, with mustard, spicy mustard, and miracle whip because it was closer to the front of the fridge
6. 5:10 PM: six reduced fat cheese-its
7. 7:30 PM: four slices of garlic bread with sauce
**DRINKS: four 8 oz. glasses of orange juice, and water.
Mindset (brain dump)
Really, really sad. I miss people. I don't know why. I really wish I could take what everyone else expects me to be out of the equation and see if that would change me. I never thought it would until today.
School Day (mindset)
Hate Palmer's class. She expects everyone to share her mindset. I am tired of graduated friends telling me how cool her class is. She is cool; her class sucks. Bullshit my way through a pop essay. Get the answer wrong, but so does everyone else, so I feel sort of alright about it.
Can not focus on anything in Jacobs class. Think about how screwed up my guitar is and how I am too retarded to know how to tune it myself. Wish I could be as good as D. Don't want to think about D, so resign to not thinking.
Skip physics B to go to a senior meeting, which Shae and Dan neglect to tell me actually begins forty minutes after class starts, but tell me to skip with them and do the blood drive and that we'll be excused. Do it even though I should be helping my group with the lab. Eat a sandwich. Danielle and Shae ask who bruised my neck. I say I don't know what they're talking about, and they drop it. Go into Palmer's class to try to get people to donate blood and Dakota doesn't notice that I'm in there. His yearbook page looks gross but I don't say anything. Turns out the meeting is canceled, but we get excuses so it doesn't really matter.
Video in psych. That class is boring, but we get new seats and mine is right behind Dakota, who sits behind Alex. I now have no one to make funny expressions at except Sara, who is sort of constantly glazed over. Dakota keeps laying back on my desk and I have this really odd urge to push him off, every time. He hasn't texted me for three days, which is a huge turn around from daily messages for a week and a half. Sara asks me whats up with me and Dakota and I shrug. I don't care anymore. Alex says he's talking to some other girl. Alex texts me to see if I want to hang out after school.
Can't focus in Multimedia; leave for half an hour to walk around the school and buy food for Alyssa B. Go to the bathroom in B wing and cry. Come back and sit by Jeff Wong, who starts looking up baseball tickets. I go back over to my seat and put my head down and cry more and after class Maria asks what is wrong with my eyes because they look puffy. Say it is because of David's house being full of cat fur... partially true so I don't feel bad for lying.
Econ sucks, but Mike gives me cookies because I'm sad.
I play calculator games in Stat, and talk to Robbie about masturbation and why I don't bother with that shit anymore. "It's like wanting chocolate cake and getting jello."
School sucks in general, and I go to work instead of seeing Alex and going to the swim meet to see Dakota, and I come home and my grandparents treat me like shit. I hate this household. I clean, I clean, I listen to some music and cry, I clean, and now I am going to sleep. The End.
Diet (times are approximate)
1. 9:00 AM: one peanut butter and jelly sandwich (blood drive)
2. 11:00 AM: 1/6 of a granola bar (peanut butter flavored, from Robert Hudson)
3. 11:45 AM: two chocolate chip cookies (from Michael Green)
4. 12:30 PM: four twizzlers
5. 5:00 PM: one turkey sandwich on pumpernickel bread, with mustard, spicy mustard, and miracle whip because it was closer to the front of the fridge
6. 5:10 PM: six reduced fat cheese-its
7. 7:30 PM: four slices of garlic bread with sauce
**DRINKS: four 8 oz. glasses of orange juice, and water.
Mindset (brain dump)
Really, really sad. I miss people. I don't know why. I really wish I could take what everyone else expects me to be out of the equation and see if that would change me. I never thought it would until today.
School Day (mindset)
Hate Palmer's class. She expects everyone to share her mindset. I am tired of graduated friends telling me how cool her class is. She is cool; her class sucks. Bullshit my way through a pop essay. Get the answer wrong, but so does everyone else, so I feel sort of alright about it.
Can not focus on anything in Jacobs class. Think about how screwed up my guitar is and how I am too retarded to know how to tune it myself. Wish I could be as good as D. Don't want to think about D, so resign to not thinking.
Skip physics B to go to a senior meeting, which Shae and Dan neglect to tell me actually begins forty minutes after class starts, but tell me to skip with them and do the blood drive and that we'll be excused. Do it even though I should be helping my group with the lab. Eat a sandwich. Danielle and Shae ask who bruised my neck. I say I don't know what they're talking about, and they drop it. Go into Palmer's class to try to get people to donate blood and Dakota doesn't notice that I'm in there. His yearbook page looks gross but I don't say anything. Turns out the meeting is canceled, but we get excuses so it doesn't really matter.
Video in psych. That class is boring, but we get new seats and mine is right behind Dakota, who sits behind Alex. I now have no one to make funny expressions at except Sara, who is sort of constantly glazed over. Dakota keeps laying back on my desk and I have this really odd urge to push him off, every time. He hasn't texted me for three days, which is a huge turn around from daily messages for a week and a half. Sara asks me whats up with me and Dakota and I shrug. I don't care anymore. Alex says he's talking to some other girl. Alex texts me to see if I want to hang out after school.
Can't focus in Multimedia; leave for half an hour to walk around the school and buy food for Alyssa B. Go to the bathroom in B wing and cry. Come back and sit by Jeff Wong, who starts looking up baseball tickets. I go back over to my seat and put my head down and cry more and after class Maria asks what is wrong with my eyes because they look puffy. Say it is because of David's house being full of cat fur... partially true so I don't feel bad for lying.
Econ sucks, but Mike gives me cookies because I'm sad.
I play calculator games in Stat, and talk to Robbie about masturbation and why I don't bother with that shit anymore. "It's like wanting chocolate cake and getting jello."
School sucks in general, and I go to work instead of seeing Alex and going to the swim meet to see Dakota, and I come home and my grandparents treat me like shit. I hate this household. I clean, I clean, I listen to some music and cry, I clean, and now I am going to sleep. The End.