Treasures from around the internet!
1. Hey, look! ds_workshop is back, and I made a whole post about the RCMP. Guys, I want to be a Mountie. Except they make you do stuff like run laps and drive fast and arrest people. But the hats! I think the hats would make up for that whole "apparatus of state power" thing, and the forced exercise. Maybe.
2. Speaking of exercise, I braved the Snow Day conditions outside to troop down the YWCA, where I did weights for an hour and then, insanely, did lengths in the pool for a half hour. I am now made of solid muscle! Okay, no, not yet. I am still a tentacle creature despite the efforts of my young teenage swim coach (she called me "m'am!" I'm only 24!) but I've mastered the back crawl enough to be trusted on my own in the pool. The front crawl continues to inspire anxiety in the lifeguards on duty, but I'm steadily improving. Still. Breathing + moving arms + kicking? Worse than dancing! And I am a really, really bad dancer.
3. I saw a commercial for the new MacBook Air last night, and holy Jesus, do I ever want. I mean, I'm a simple girl. When I consider what I'd save from a fire, I think it would just be the cat, the boyfriend, the laptop, and my writing journals. Everything else can be replaced. So I'm not really much of a materialist, but dear lord, the MacBook Air is a very sexy machine. 3.0 pounds! About the width of an index finger! So what if it's too expensive and my current iBook works just fine? It's shiny and pretty and made of aluminum and I could carry it places! *drools*
4. This Sarah Silverman video (completely hilarious and not worksafe in the slightest) inspired the following exchange between scarfe and I:
Me: Just so you know, I'm not fucking Matt Damon.
scarfe: Just so you know, I am.
Me: That's an outrageous lie.
scarfe: Yeah. But I'd be tempted. He is The Bourne.
Me: Really? If you could do one guy, it'd be Matty D?
scarfe: [thinks] Well, no. Not unless Affleck was there too.
Me: Kinky.
5. Today I will write porn. It may even be kinky porn. And while I was trudging home through the blizzard on the way back from the gym, I thought to myself, "Hey, self, you know what would be fun? If instead of writing horrific Wilby Wonderful stories that involve pain and humiliation for the characters, how about you write something cute, like Duck and Dan joining a misfit bowling team? Duck wants Dan to feel more at home in Wilby, and Dan wants to spend more time with Duck, and they decide to join the local league. At first there is resistence from the local Small Town Types (colourful characters all) but gradually they are accepted. And then the team make it to the championships in Halifax and they're up against Big-Time Homophobic Jerks, and everyone is convinced that the team won't win, but Duck pulls the everyone together and Dan turns out to be an amazing bowler and they combat homophobia through 10-pin strikes and spares!
That would be a cute story, right? I thought it would be fun to write, but then a snowplow went by, and I realized it was just a hop, skip and a jump from that bunny to writing something like Kingpin where someone loses a hand in the ball return. I decided that I don't know enough about a) bowling or b) humour to make that story worthwhile. But still! I do think about these things. It's not all pain and suffering, y'know? Sometimes there are bowling balls.
6. My C6D Valentine's Day card came in the mail today! And dudes, I cannot even. There is a drawing. Which illustrates a promise made in the card's inscription. It is F/K, and I think it may in fact be the best thing in the entire world. I will post a scan as soon as isiscolo gives the okay. *dies*
In conclusion? I like snow days.
2. Speaking of exercise, I braved the Snow Day conditions outside to troop down the YWCA, where I did weights for an hour and then, insanely, did lengths in the pool for a half hour. I am now made of solid muscle! Okay, no, not yet. I am still a tentacle creature despite the efforts of my young teenage swim coach (she called me "m'am!" I'm only 24!) but I've mastered the back crawl enough to be trusted on my own in the pool. The front crawl continues to inspire anxiety in the lifeguards on duty, but I'm steadily improving. Still. Breathing + moving arms + kicking? Worse than dancing! And I am a really, really bad dancer.
3. I saw a commercial for the new MacBook Air last night, and holy Jesus, do I ever want. I mean, I'm a simple girl. When I consider what I'd save from a fire, I think it would just be the cat, the boyfriend, the laptop, and my writing journals. Everything else can be replaced. So I'm not really much of a materialist, but dear lord, the MacBook Air is a very sexy machine. 3.0 pounds! About the width of an index finger! So what if it's too expensive and my current iBook works just fine? It's shiny and pretty and made of aluminum and I could carry it places! *drools*
4. This Sarah Silverman video (completely hilarious and not worksafe in the slightest) inspired the following exchange between scarfe and I:
Me: Just so you know, I'm not fucking Matt Damon.
scarfe: Just so you know, I am.
Me: That's an outrageous lie.
scarfe: Yeah. But I'd be tempted. He is The Bourne.
Me: Really? If you could do one guy, it'd be Matty D?
scarfe: [thinks] Well, no. Not unless Affleck was there too.
Me: Kinky.
5. Today I will write porn. It may even be kinky porn. And while I was trudging home through the blizzard on the way back from the gym, I thought to myself, "Hey, self, you know what would be fun? If instead of writing horrific Wilby Wonderful stories that involve pain and humiliation for the characters, how about you write something cute, like Duck and Dan joining a misfit bowling team? Duck wants Dan to feel more at home in Wilby, and Dan wants to spend more time with Duck, and they decide to join the local league. At first there is resistence from the local Small Town Types (colourful characters all) but gradually they are accepted. And then the team make it to the championships in Halifax and they're up against Big-Time Homophobic Jerks, and everyone is convinced that the team won't win, but Duck pulls the everyone together and Dan turns out to be an amazing bowler and they combat homophobia through 10-pin strikes and spares!
That would be a cute story, right? I thought it would be fun to write, but then a snowplow went by, and I realized it was just a hop, skip and a jump from that bunny to writing something like Kingpin where someone loses a hand in the ball return. I decided that I don't know enough about a) bowling or b) humour to make that story worthwhile. But still! I do think about these things. It's not all pain and suffering, y'know? Sometimes there are bowling balls.
6. My C6D Valentine's Day card came in the mail today! And dudes, I cannot even. There is a drawing. Which illustrates a promise made in the card's inscription. It is F/K, and I think it may in fact be the best thing in the entire world. I will post a scan as soon as isiscolo gives the okay. *dies*
In conclusion? I like snow days.