[FICbit]: A Little Selfishness
Selfless. That’s what everyone called him. Selfless.
Certainly, he did give off that sort of impression. After all, holding back the true power of Tribe King, even knowing it would eventually kill him? And yet knowing this, refusing to pass it on unless absolutely necessary, to spare another from feeling the pain and burden of being the Leader. To go about his business day after day, still managing to give out unbiased, fair, reasonable judgments…it was really something, wasn’t it? No wonder everyone saw him as selfless.
Nope! Definitely not! Selfish! He was definitely selfish! Or at least, that’s what Virgo would have said, if he was asked.
Of course, no one would ever think of asking one of the Regulars of their opinion. They changed too much, too often, to pin down an exact personality or thought or title, and since they all kept the same generic traits of the original hero Rockman, no one seemed to note that Virgo was one of the few that had remained at their position for the whole five years of the Rockman Project.
It was to be expected, of course. Who else could perform the role of the Prince (or to some: Queen, embarrassingly enough) of the Seas, other than one who knew the ocean like the back of their hand? Even if no one did notice that Virgo was just as much a veteran as the so-named “six superiors,” it was always noted that Virgo had a grace and refinement to their abilities that seemed to set themselves apart from the other Regulars. Every Regular had that sort of innocuous personality trait, so it was brushed off as such a thing, but..he did notice. Of course he would have. Leader saw everything, did he not? How else would he be able to make such well-informed decisions?
Of course he saw. Why else would he pin down as Virgo, out of all of them, as the one he felt could stop him at full strength (given some environmental advantages), rather than the Wild Card, or the Master? After all, it was their jobs to be the best, wasn’t it? But no…he picked out Virgo, because he knew. Virgo’s abilities with water, the sea itself, were unparalleled-and while it wasn’t stated out loud, it could be said that his natural affinity with it made him superior to the Master, at least in that regard. The difference was minor, and really was all down to perception, so it wasn’t really a logical sort of decision at all, though. More like…completely emotional.
In the end, even a calm and composed Leader had to vent. And the best place to vent without hurting someone, to his mind, was international waters. No laws. No territories. Just wide expanse of sea and sky.
Venting always starts out the same-an ungodly scream to the skies as the doors to his power unlock, a pillar of light, the silhouette of the Tribe King’s already bulky form getting somehow even more unreasonably bulkier. With all the armor on, he looks hulking, almost monsterlike compared to his usual self; the only thing keeping him from looking like a complete terror is how small his actual body looks under all the armor and decorations. It’s a wonder that he can even move, but he does.
Standing in place is what he does next, just towering imposingly over the water as the power courses through him, burning through its restraints and rushing free in a surge that threatens to overwhelm everything. This too, damages him, but overall it’s the lesser of two evils, isn’t it, burning himself out instead of succumbing over time to illness and restraint and letting the power go loose all at once? No, a continuous gentle vent, whenever possible, was best. It was the best course of action to prolong his life as long as possible and ensure that he could do the most for others. It was the decision of Leader. No one questioned the decisions of Leader. And no one would question this decision of Leader, because no one save Virgo knew of this decision.
A few testing attacks. Good. The stream of power is steady and doesn’t fluctuate. But now comes the hard part. Now that the power is flowing, it is difficult to stop-it will always want to keep moving unless it is stopped by an equally opposing force. But what sort of equally opposing force could match the true power of the Tribe King?
The willpower of the Tribe King, of course. It hadn’t failed yet. Even if the effort to call back the power into restraint exhausts him severely even only after a few minutes, he still is able to pull it back on its own. So far, Virgo’s coming along with him had proven to be useless, if only in that regard.
Still, Virgo came whenever he was asked. Even if they didn’t talk, even if it was just sitting together in silence on top of the waters…he came regardless.
Sometimes, Leader apologizes.
“For me to be causing others below me trouble, that’s not my place…”
Virgo doesn’t respond, usually. He’s always like this when by the ocean, more in tune to it rather than any others who may be around him, moving currents of water without any conscious thought. It’s a soothing mental exercise, and allows him to feel closer to the sea, and so Leader doesn’t begrudge him that. If anything, it makes any confessions easier, as if he’s talking to nothing but the oceans around him, that great impassive body that takes all into its watery embrace without discretion. He doesn’t dislike that trait of Virgo’s, not at all.
One night, his usual apologies go a bit further than usual.
“…But what can I do? I say that I’m ready, that I can do this for all my life…I know that every second of my life is borrowed. I can only do so much, right…?”
Still no response. As expected from the graceful and steady Prince of the Seas.
“I don’t want to die.” It’s said in his usual tone, a tired yet warm sort of voice, and yet it’s tinged with a fear and a loneliness that isn’t becoming of such a lofty position. “I say these things, that I’m ready for whatever happens, that I’ll burden whatever it takes, but…I’m scared to die, like everyone else…” There’s a peal of soft laughter, even as he’s floating aimlessly on his back on the surface of the water, the barest hint of tears welling up from his eyes.
“So much for the awe-inspiring and selfless leader, ah…?”
It’s always strange, seeing Leader this way. Not that it’s unfamiliar to Virgo, no, not at all. But for the composed, businesslike, awe-inspiring Leader to be acting like a scared child…it would always be jarring, no matter what.
The water moves, currents ebbing and flowing around Leader and yet not soaking his clothes, running the fine line between dry and wet. Droplets of water splash across his face and yet don’t stick, instead drawing the tears to the ocean and letting them drain away without any trace of water on his skin.
“It doesn’t matter. When you die, you die.” The first words that Virgo has spoken at all that night.
Ahh, perhaps he’s tired of such mutterings already? He never did think positively, not much, and my preference does him no favors, of course.
The waters continue to move, almost in a caressing motion, and Leader finds that his body is in fact being gently rocked by the currents, soothing his aching muscles and his body that is so unwilling to move after the ordeal he has put it through yet again.
“But…worrying about such a thing from time to time…that’s not a problem. We all have those moments.”
This gets a weak chuckle out of Leader as he turns his head slightly, watching Virgo sit on the waves with seemingly impenetrable grace.
“Is that so…”
A companionable silence surrounds the two of them as they relax under the moon. Being alone with their thoughts like this isn’t unpleasant for either one, as morbid as they can get sometimes. Not so long as they’re together like this, anyways.
It’s moments like these that Virgo can forgive Leader for insistently snatching him away for such a tiresome task, sometimes without thought for his own comfort or safety.
A little selfishness, from time to time, isn’t unacceptable, is it?
0-0-FIN-0-0
[A/N]: uwaah hanun i'm so sorry for the terrible aaahhhhh
Certainly, he did give off that sort of impression. After all, holding back the true power of Tribe King, even knowing it would eventually kill him? And yet knowing this, refusing to pass it on unless absolutely necessary, to spare another from feeling the pain and burden of being the Leader. To go about his business day after day, still managing to give out unbiased, fair, reasonable judgments…it was really something, wasn’t it? No wonder everyone saw him as selfless.
Nope! Definitely not! Selfish! He was definitely selfish! Or at least, that’s what Virgo would have said, if he was asked.
Of course, no one would ever think of asking one of the Regulars of their opinion. They changed too much, too often, to pin down an exact personality or thought or title, and since they all kept the same generic traits of the original hero Rockman, no one seemed to note that Virgo was one of the few that had remained at their position for the whole five years of the Rockman Project.
It was to be expected, of course. Who else could perform the role of the Prince (or to some: Queen, embarrassingly enough) of the Seas, other than one who knew the ocean like the back of their hand? Even if no one did notice that Virgo was just as much a veteran as the so-named “six superiors,” it was always noted that Virgo had a grace and refinement to their abilities that seemed to set themselves apart from the other Regulars. Every Regular had that sort of innocuous personality trait, so it was brushed off as such a thing, but..he did notice. Of course he would have. Leader saw everything, did he not? How else would he be able to make such well-informed decisions?
Of course he saw. Why else would he pin down as Virgo, out of all of them, as the one he felt could stop him at full strength (given some environmental advantages), rather than the Wild Card, or the Master? After all, it was their jobs to be the best, wasn’t it? But no…he picked out Virgo, because he knew. Virgo’s abilities with water, the sea itself, were unparalleled-and while it wasn’t stated out loud, it could be said that his natural affinity with it made him superior to the Master, at least in that regard. The difference was minor, and really was all down to perception, so it wasn’t really a logical sort of decision at all, though. More like…completely emotional.
In the end, even a calm and composed Leader had to vent. And the best place to vent without hurting someone, to his mind, was international waters. No laws. No territories. Just wide expanse of sea and sky.
Venting always starts out the same-an ungodly scream to the skies as the doors to his power unlock, a pillar of light, the silhouette of the Tribe King’s already bulky form getting somehow even more unreasonably bulkier. With all the armor on, he looks hulking, almost monsterlike compared to his usual self; the only thing keeping him from looking like a complete terror is how small his actual body looks under all the armor and decorations. It’s a wonder that he can even move, but he does.
Standing in place is what he does next, just towering imposingly over the water as the power courses through him, burning through its restraints and rushing free in a surge that threatens to overwhelm everything. This too, damages him, but overall it’s the lesser of two evils, isn’t it, burning himself out instead of succumbing over time to illness and restraint and letting the power go loose all at once? No, a continuous gentle vent, whenever possible, was best. It was the best course of action to prolong his life as long as possible and ensure that he could do the most for others. It was the decision of Leader. No one questioned the decisions of Leader. And no one would question this decision of Leader, because no one save Virgo knew of this decision.
A few testing attacks. Good. The stream of power is steady and doesn’t fluctuate. But now comes the hard part. Now that the power is flowing, it is difficult to stop-it will always want to keep moving unless it is stopped by an equally opposing force. But what sort of equally opposing force could match the true power of the Tribe King?
The willpower of the Tribe King, of course. It hadn’t failed yet. Even if the effort to call back the power into restraint exhausts him severely even only after a few minutes, he still is able to pull it back on its own. So far, Virgo’s coming along with him had proven to be useless, if only in that regard.
Still, Virgo came whenever he was asked. Even if they didn’t talk, even if it was just sitting together in silence on top of the waters…he came regardless.
Sometimes, Leader apologizes.
“For me to be causing others below me trouble, that’s not my place…”
Virgo doesn’t respond, usually. He’s always like this when by the ocean, more in tune to it rather than any others who may be around him, moving currents of water without any conscious thought. It’s a soothing mental exercise, and allows him to feel closer to the sea, and so Leader doesn’t begrudge him that. If anything, it makes any confessions easier, as if he’s talking to nothing but the oceans around him, that great impassive body that takes all into its watery embrace without discretion. He doesn’t dislike that trait of Virgo’s, not at all.
One night, his usual apologies go a bit further than usual.
“…But what can I do? I say that I’m ready, that I can do this for all my life…I know that every second of my life is borrowed. I can only do so much, right…?”
Still no response. As expected from the graceful and steady Prince of the Seas.
“I don’t want to die.” It’s said in his usual tone, a tired yet warm sort of voice, and yet it’s tinged with a fear and a loneliness that isn’t becoming of such a lofty position. “I say these things, that I’m ready for whatever happens, that I’ll burden whatever it takes, but…I’m scared to die, like everyone else…” There’s a peal of soft laughter, even as he’s floating aimlessly on his back on the surface of the water, the barest hint of tears welling up from his eyes.
“So much for the awe-inspiring and selfless leader, ah…?”
It’s always strange, seeing Leader this way. Not that it’s unfamiliar to Virgo, no, not at all. But for the composed, businesslike, awe-inspiring Leader to be acting like a scared child…it would always be jarring, no matter what.
The water moves, currents ebbing and flowing around Leader and yet not soaking his clothes, running the fine line between dry and wet. Droplets of water splash across his face and yet don’t stick, instead drawing the tears to the ocean and letting them drain away without any trace of water on his skin.
“It doesn’t matter. When you die, you die.” The first words that Virgo has spoken at all that night.
Ahh, perhaps he’s tired of such mutterings already? He never did think positively, not much, and my preference does him no favors, of course.
The waters continue to move, almost in a caressing motion, and Leader finds that his body is in fact being gently rocked by the currents, soothing his aching muscles and his body that is so unwilling to move after the ordeal he has put it through yet again.
“But…worrying about such a thing from time to time…that’s not a problem. We all have those moments.”
This gets a weak chuckle out of Leader as he turns his head slightly, watching Virgo sit on the waves with seemingly impenetrable grace.
“Is that so…”
A companionable silence surrounds the two of them as they relax under the moon. Being alone with their thoughts like this isn’t unpleasant for either one, as morbid as they can get sometimes. Not so long as they’re together like this, anyways.
It’s moments like these that Virgo can forgive Leader for insistently snatching him away for such a tiresome task, sometimes without thought for his own comfort or safety.
A little selfishness, from time to time, isn’t unacceptable, is it?
0-0-FIN-0-0
[A/N]: uwaah hanun i'm so sorry for the terrible aaahhhhh